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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To hope Ant

162 replies

Theresasmayshoes11 · 21/03/2018 09:28

Gets the help he needs and gets his life back on track. Glad no one was hurt in the incident and hope to see him back on the TV with Dec as soon as he’s better. To not sneer and be gleeful at the implosion of another human being or so glad that a ‘national treasure’ has shown himself to be fragile.

OP posts:
QuiteLikely5 · 21/03/2018 10:32

Ant is getting a trial by MN! Grin

QuiteLikely5 · 21/03/2018 10:32

Clearly some on here have inside knowledge

Alexkate2468 · 21/03/2018 10:33

OP I'm with you. What he did was wreckless and dangerous and completely wrong. However his choice to get in that car didn't come from a mentally healthy place. Depression and anxiety and addiction completely screw your thinking. I'd like to think of he was mentally well, he would never have got behind the wheel.

We spend so long raising awareness of mental illness and trying to get rid of the stigma then persecute someone in distress. We can condem his actions and respond to those with the appropriate actions (he should have charges etc) without writing him off as a person. I'd bet he's not exactly feeling proud of what he did.

I do hope he gets help and is well soon. I also hope he sees that what he did was unacceptable and never does it again.

CuboidalSlipshoddy · 21/03/2018 10:34

I think it just goes to show that you can have fame, wealth and privilege but still get ripped apart by your demons.

Or, of course, that you can have fame, wealth and privilege and still be an arsehole who likes a skinful and doesn't care if driving is illegal.

Here's a fame, wealth, etc man who supposedly had "demons". He beat his girlfriend to death and pretty much got away with it.

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bertrand_Cantat

OyO · 21/03/2018 10:35

but he'd fallen asleep. He didnt make that choice...Ant chose to drink

Bizarre Confused

The driver CHOSE to get in the car well aware he was too tired to concentrate on the journey.

As far as Ant is concerned:

  1. Failing the roadside breathalyser does not mean you are illegally over the limit, he could have passed the second test at the station. Police have to go with the lowest reading.
  1. He hasn’t been charged, suggesting he wasn’t drunk at the wheel.
  1. He has an addiction problem. Obviously this will impact on his ability to make rational decisions such as getting in a car and driving when he may not be safe to do so.
IanRushesInadequateFlushes · 21/03/2018 10:35

Nobody else was taken to the police station, quite. They were taken to the HOSPITAL though.

IanRushesInadequateFlushes · 21/03/2018 10:37

If he'd done nothing wrong, he wouldn't have rushed off to rehab without finishing the series and risked all that damage to his career etc.

We don't know what happened. There's enough to say he's not an innocent perfect driver. As it happens, the outcome should be the best possible - nobody seriously hurt and ant able to get help. But it could have ended very differently.

HollyBayTree · 21/03/2018 10:39

Enough of the waht-ifs.

What if I left for work this morning and a plane fell out of the sky - it does happen

What if .....

... well it didnt happen.

italiancortado · 21/03/2018 10:44

Where is the evidence that it was his fault?

Fuck sake. That takes the defending to another level.

He was over the legal drink drive limit when he was breath tested at the road side.

Nice to try and suggest he didn't cause the accident, as if that some how absolves him of any wrong doing.

Even if there was NO accident, he is still an arrogant dick head who has to be held responsible for his own actions.

Gromance02 · 21/03/2018 10:47

Hopefully one day people will have the same disgust for drink driving as those that use their mobile phone at the wheel. Slightly off-topic but I just wanted to make the point.
An idiot drove in to the back of DH's car last year as they were checking their phone. He couldn't work for about 2 months and is still suffering with pain. There is NOTHING I wouldn't wish on the vile creature that did this to him.

Idontdowindows · 21/03/2018 10:53

Your daughter was hurt by a drunk driver and you're sympathetic to drunk drivers?

My sibling was killed by one and I think they should be locked up for life.

juddyrockingcloggs · 21/03/2018 10:55

I love Ant & Dec and whether you like them on the telly or not is simply a matter of opinion.

Ant has committed a crime, an irresponsible one that endangered not only his own life but also the lives of others including children - that needs dealing with legally in exactly the same way that anyone else, famous or not, would be dealt with. He is worth millions of pounds and he could afford a taxi or a driver every day of his life he made a decision and peoples negative opinions are to be expected and he needs to take them on the chin.

However, having said that it's clear that he has mental health issues and I truly truly hope that he gets the help he needs. I don't like to see anyone bulled up and then ripped down which is something our media does and does it with relish. It loves nothing more than seeing people fall from a great height.

I do hope that he sorts his demons and I hope to see him back on the telly one day because I enjoy his and Decs shows but I don't think that now they will be the 'golden boys' that many people had them down has.

retirednow · 21/03/2018 10:57

Does jo public get offered rehab the day after they are arrested for drink driving. No. I am sorry he clearly has problems but he's lucky to be able to get help. Many don't.

ivenoideawhatimdoing · 21/03/2018 10:58

I despise drink driving, I think it's one of the worst every day crimes people commit.

I resent the insinuation everyone has done similar. Yes, I have made mistakes, but I have never made a mistake which could physically harm someone else.

He could have killed people and I'd put my house on it it isn't the first time he has driven drunk and I really won't be surprised if it isn't the last.

I hope he never gets back of telly, it's not just 'making a mistake', like rape isn't 'making a mistake', or domestic abuse isn't 'making a mistake'.

He is a grown man capable of making decisions. Being drunk is not an excuse, that is why you are still recognised as being competent of deciding your own actions. He could have killed someone; fuck the fact he's a national treasure. So was Jimmy Saville.

I hope he gets the book thrown at him.

Seafoodeatit · 21/03/2018 11:07

YABU. I find the duo about as funny as paint drying, their personal lives I don't really give a shit about either. I don't see much sneering, I think they comments on drink driving would be the same regardless, why should his fame solicit sympathy? make a living out of being in the public eye though and you'll errr be in the public eye for better or for worse.

'National treasure' is extremely nauseating.

JaneJeffer · 21/03/2018 11:09

You can't compare him to Jimmy Saville FFS!

Aeroflotgirl · 21/03/2018 11:11

Yes she should be punished like everybody else, being famous should not lessen that, but it is obvious he needs to get professional help now.

mirime · 21/03/2018 11:15

@ShowOfHands

I have found the crass statements on here about levels of income and talent baffling.

Level of income is relevant in a way though. Given how hard it can be to access NHS substance misuse services, even if you're desperate for help while he has the money to book himself into rehab whenever he wants.

And I don't care about him being a celebrity, I've not watched anything with Ant & Dec in since Byker Grove and am always mildly surprised that they're still on tv.

PaddyF0dder · 21/03/2018 11:16

Nope.

Like other people here...

  • I hope he recovers from his mental health difficulties
  • I hope he faces the full extent of the law for being a drunk driver
  • I hope his career doesn’t recover. He can do something else with his life. He can’t have the old one back.
sundowners · 21/03/2018 11:19

I know this stretch of road very well. From reports, and my own experience it sounds like he took the mini roundabout too fast (it is pretty dodgy/has too fast flowing traffic from all sides that often don't stop). Then soon after taking it comes a very sharp bend round in the road so after taking roundabout too fast as perhaps no other traffic to halt him, then didn't prepare/have control taking the next bend. As the position of all cars/damage indicates- flew round the corner and into the 1st mini in the opposite lane/oncoming traffic and then car continued/was only stopped by banging into the BMW 4X4, also on the other side of the road. It was a snowy/ice day in London so wander if that contributed perhaps too.

Speculations aside if he was well over the limit- no excuse at all. Also think the way his issues with addiction/depression was handled was utterly appallingly. Listening back to the clip on radio yesterday where Dec and him on "I'm a Celeb..." completely MAKE LIGHT OF/brush over/take the piss about his near year long absence due to addiction and rehab- he had the chance re. his position as a presenter,mainly to younger audiences who would sit up and listen to him- to use this and address the issues in a serious way and highlight it. But it was glossed over and joked about as an embarrassing secret by him and Dec, as so much is.

Also agree ITV and the way they completely mishandled his issues/treatment/continued recovery has clearly been absolutely shocking.

italiancortado · 21/03/2018 11:20

What level of mentality are we at when jimmy fucking saville is the response.

Seriously. This is nothing to do with, or even remotely similar to, jimmy saville.

ShowOfHands · 21/03/2018 11:33

@mirime I've actually only seen income statements regarding Dec. Refusing to see that he might be understandably upset at the career turn as "fuck him, he's rich, he'll cope". I should have been clearer.

Tringley · 21/03/2018 11:46

He made a terrible mistake. We all make terrible mistakes in life.

A terrible mistake is when you put laundry detergent in the toilet and bleach in the washing machine. He committed a deliberate, awful crime that endangered the lives and safety of everyone who had the misfortune to be in his vicinity. An alcoholic has a dreadful compulsion to drink they do not have a dreadful compulsion to drive. I have a degree of sympathy for the former. The latter is an unforgivable crime and I really, really, really hope he sees jail time.

Awwlookatmybabyspider · 21/03/2018 11:49

A family including a 3 year old baby could have been killed or suffered life changing injuries. I don't think anyone will be "gleefully" sneering.

LittleLionMansMummy · 21/03/2018 11:57

I think addiction and mental ill health drives people to do harmful, reckless things that they probably wouldn't do in normal circumstances. Therefore I think it's in everyone's best interests that such people, including celebrities, get the help they need when necessary. Addiction destroys lives.

But he also did a foolish, dangerous and potentially life changing/ life ending thing. Part of his eventual rehab involves understanding the consequences of his actions, including the punitive element.

I wish him well, as I do the thousands of others out there who are not so fortunate to have the means he does to seek help.