To want a home birth?

[InMemoryOfSleep]

I’m not pregnant (yet), but chatting to my mum and some friends recently I mentioned I’d like a home birth next time. Their reactions weren’t positive, to say the least - despite me explaining that, for a 2nd baby, home birth is as safe as an MLU, and both are safer than a hospital. They’ve made me really doubt myself - having read the research and stats I was convinced it’s the best option, but am I missing something?!

I can think of anything worse.

It wouldn't be relaxing for me knowing I was an ambulance ride away from anaesthetists, consultants, paediatricians and an operating theatre. I'd be an anxious mess. I don't understand women who say it's more relaxing. Even if you are more relaxed...it's not a spa weekend. The aim is to deliver the baby with mother and baby both alive at the end of it.

I'd imagine there's women in the developing world who'd think we were completely mad to consider this when we don't have to.

I hadn't heard that before about labours being longer in this generation. That is really interesting and I wonder what causes it?
Or were previous generations so stoical that they just put up with it and didn't think of it as labour until they were about 5cm?
I do take the point about women being neglected in busy wards in hospital and not having dedicated care or monitoring.

windchimesabotage that is simply not true. There is a dedicated theatre team for true emergency sections. In the event of a true emergency there is always a team available. Lower priority 'emergency sections ' are managed to ensure there is a theatre available for those that are true emergencies.
In essence the ones that were waiting could wait, and it was safe to wait.

Violette "Statistics are manipulated by the fact most women at home are low risk in the first place". No. It's called adjusting for case mix. It's a standard statistical practice that helps weed out the factors that may unduly influence the result.

Minty I work with a lot of drs and they all say the same thing - they would never chose a homebirth due to their experience of witnessing births gone wrong. I totally understand this perspective. I'm sure I'd have gone for an ELCS if I'd had that experience too. It's a valid choice. As is homebirth for those who are low risk and haven't repeatedly witnessed birth trauma.

At end of the day everyone can make their own choices. There is no more risk to home birthing #2 than there is giving birth in hospital in the UK. Thanks to amazing MWs. Women can choose where they feel more relaxed to give birth (this releases oxytocin which promotes labour and more relaxed you are less interventions and so less risks) or a women can have a ELCS if that's how she feels most comfortable. If women can all have good births, how she wants and feels supported, then there will be less PD and PTSD.

We were offered with first but opted for MW led unit.

Had HB with second and it was a much better experience - and I recovered very quickly possibly by avoiding the awful postnatal ward. It hadn’t occurred to us to tell friends and family it was a discussion between DH and I and my MW - few local friends who it was mentioned to in passing were very anti. Afterwards family were very shocked.

Third new team and booked HB - was fine with then later in pg they suddenly weren’t and we started to have to wade through lies and misinformation. At same time family, who knew about previous HB, were trying to pressure us to be sensible and have a hospital birth.

We waded through all that was told HB was fine and that came from the absolute top of hospital and MW manager – went into labour and they proceeded to utterly let us down.

They failed to turn up to well after birth with no explanation.

Our friend and family all seem to think we’d asked for that by opting for a HB and tried to dwell on the negative outcomes – we complained again and moved on.

I heard some pretty horrific hospital birth stories along similar lines including a preventable stillbirth but the parents there were all seen as unlucky to be let down by HCP not so with us.

We’ve never felt able to face another pg and birth so can’t say whether we’d have opted for another HB after that.

YANBU - but I think you'll find people in general really don't like HB and won't be swayed by any evidence.

scaredofthecity but in that case how often are true 'emergency sections' performed? My friend had an 'emergency section' that she was told she needed because her baby was distressed and she was still waiting for an hour or so from the first mention of a section to actually being moved into theatre. I just dont think that there are that many scenarios in which a decision over a section is made in a matter of minutes. Maybe that does sometimes happen but no one ive ever heard from personally had a section in 0-3 mins as some people on here are suggesting may happen. I honestly think if you live ten mins away from a hospital and you are being constantly monitored by midwives there will not be much time difference in your access to an emergency section as there will be for people actually in the hospital. Im sure the midwives monitoring you at home do not wait until they think you and the baby are on deaths door to suggest you might need a section.. im pretty sure that at the first sign of you maybe needing one they will advise you to transfer to hospital.

That was my point. You are actually monitored continuously at home as well, more than you would be in hospital (unless you were induced or are high risk etc) So if you live within easy distance of a hospital I really dont think theres much in it in terms of risks being increased.

And indeed the statistics would agree with me.
Of course there are always times when birth goes very badly wrong but actually that can just as easily happen in a hospital.

If all women can all have good births, how she wants and feels supported

This is key. I'm 7 months pregnant and I'm very pro women having the choice to home birth if they want to. For my particular circumstances however, a good birth looks most likely to come from a planned CS. I'm going to have to fight for this.

I think the stats are always going to be somewhat skewed given the fact that most women give birth in hospital (so of course there is going to be a higher incidence of negative outcomes in hospital)

Before I was diagnosed with GD, a home birth was being quite aggressively pushed. So glad it never happened as DC3 ended up in neonatal. The walk from labour ward to neonatal (interconnected on same floor so took moments) was a hell of a lot preferable than being bluelighted with a sick baby.

I've had a birthing centre birth, which is on a different floor but in the same hospital as labour ward / neonatal and it was a lovely experience. A very happy middle ground for me, although I get why it's not ideal for the OP.

Best friend had a home birth with her first. Ended up in an ambulance / emergency c-section and now has PTSD.

**windchimesabotage

Agree with your post - that’s how I understand it.

I think also that theatre and the dedicated team need to prepare / scrub up (? Excuse lack of knowledge on terms) so if they knew ambulance phoned and you were on way they would be doing this and ready when arrived.

I assume also a tf to theatre from hb would qualify as an emergency theatre team needed?

No it doesn't happen that often, but it can and does happen regularly enough that a dedicated team is available 24/7.
It is a very personal choice, but I think it's important that women are given all the facts. The fact is that if you needed emergency intervention it is going to be longer coming from home than if you were already in hospital.
I'm not trying to sway anybody's decisions, I'm just trying to quash incorrect anacdotal information.

@Crunchymum with the best will in the world - RTFT! Stats definitely are not skewed.

I firmly believe that it is your birth and your choice. I do think it's important to do plenty of research and listen to the medical team looking after you (for example I do think it would be irresponsible to insist on a home birth if it is advised against for medical reasons) but assuming that the majority of people would, presumably, agree with that I think it has to be up to the induvidual.

I was 100 times more relaxed in hospital than at home, to be honest if they had offered to admit me for the duration of my pregnancy I would seriously have considered taking them up on it. But I had a horrible, stressful pregnancy, I appreciate it won't be the same for everyone.

I ended up with an emcs and ds was swimming in meconium (there had been no outward sign of this, the section was for failure to progress) and had to go straight to scbu so ultimately it was probably best for us that we were in hospital. I had a very positive hospital experience with a nice room and 2 midwives in permanant attendance. If we have another I've already decided on an elcs!

InMemoryOfSleep sorry but my emergency c section was less than five mins from ordering to delivery - crash section.

bigKiteFlying

Sorry to hear about your experience. Not just being let down by hcp but by people thinking it was because you chose hb.

I am part of the theatre team, we can and do perform sections in minutes. We are trained to perform a section as quick as possible if necessary.

My experience of the NHS seems definitely at odds with everyone else's because they (Drs and midwives) were so determined not to intervene, they half killed me and put ds in NICU.

I think home birth can be an okay choice especially if previous deliveries were relatively quick/problem free and I'd rate it above a standalone MLU especially if your house is closer to the hospital than the unit based on the experience of friends and the death of a baby in the one closest to us because as someone else said in this thread, it's not treated as an emergency in the truest sense of the word even if it is.

I think not fixing to any particular plan completely is the best way forward though. I have friends who still haven't got over subsequent babies being breech and one who planned a section was less than happy to arrive at hospital already at 8 cms to be pointed at the labour ward and told to get on with it (she'd gone as soon as she realised it was labour).

Ultimately only you can make the decision and whatever you decide, someone will criticize you for it. I'm having a planned section in June because of my experiences with ds and when it came up at one of ds's toddler classes, opinions were wide, varied and given by everyone.

OP if your choice is to have a Home birth that is 20 mins from a hospital or a MLU birth that is 40 mins from a hospital then it seems like an easy decision for me.

No one would question you going to a MLU and a home birth gives you the same level of care, but in your case you are closer to emergency care if you need it.

I would hazard a guess that most doctors would opt for hospital deliveries
But their view (and yours) is skewed by the type of deliveries you get involved in. I had two friends pregnant at the same time as me, one whose husband was an anaesthetist who wouldn't consider giving birth in any way without an epidural because of the experience of her husband and one who was a lawyer handling medical injury claims who would never under any circumstances have an epidural because of her experience of dealing with claims for women where it had gone horribly wrong. They were both influenced by their own experiences of birth stories but in totally opposite directions. Which one was right?
A third friend was an experienced midwife, guess what she chose for her birth?

I've had two home births, they were brilliant. I had the attendance and attention of two midwives the entire time.

My third birth was a planned home birth, nothing to do with watching netflix during labour or being 'woke'. It was because my second baby was nearly born in the back of the car with no assistance whatsoever.
As it happens my third birth was even quicker and my labour happened during rush hour, no way would I have made it to hospital.
I took the advice of my very experienced midwife. I would suggest you do the same, OP, and go from there. No need to discuss it with family members or people on the internet.

I feel like I can now admit that I have literally no idea what being ‘woke’ means

windchimesabotage I had a Category 1 Crash c-section i.e immediate threat to mother or baby, baby must be delivered in under 30 minutes from decision made. I had a birth reflections type thing a while ago where the timings were made clear, placental abruption was diagnosed at 19:21, live infant delivered 19:36. In between these times, theatre was prepped and i was put under general anesthetic.

Cat 1 is immediately life threatening and so would be prioritised, anything not Cat 1 is not immediately life threatening, but as i said, i went from low risk, progressing well to placental abruption with no warning at all.

InMemorySleep it's a word they use on tumblr a lot, it means being socially aware and politically correct. I'm not sure exactly how it connects to home births though.

Yes strax my opinion is skewed, of course it is. And anyone is free to ignore it.

Dinosauratemydaffodils I can relate they very much don’t intervene when maybe sometimes they should. Similarly to you ds ended up in SCBU because of this as well.