To want a home birth?

[InMemoryOfSleep]

I’m not pregnant (yet), but chatting to my mum and some friends recently I mentioned I’d like a home birth next time. Their reactions weren’t positive, to say the least - despite me explaining that, for a 2nd baby, home birth is as safe as an MLU, and both are safer than a hospital. They’ve made me really doubt myself - having read the research and stats I was convinced it’s the best option, but am I missing something?!

Giving birth has always been dangerous for women, but as I am the one pushing the baby out I felt I had the right to choose where I did that. I have had three successful pregnancies, 2 hospital births and 1 home birth. I had my first in a hot, dirty, london hospital with a seemingly constant shifting set of midwives and Drs, all the drugs, stress etc. But as it resulted in a healthy boy (now 13) I couldn't complain.

For no 2 I planned and had a home birth, pretty straightforward, labour in birthpool, birth on dry land, no pain relief, less stress, went straight upstairs to bed. Midwives discretely disposed of mess. More consistent midwife care, one throughout, two joined for last "push" including a student. All good. Though I wouldn't recommend stitches without pain relief. Worse than the birth.

Third, planned Hb but had baby in hospital, meconium in waters. But midwives respected my birthplace and left me to it pretty much, caught the baby and passed her to me. Probably the easiest birth and easiest baby. Could have done it at home but no regrets.

Do what you want to op. It is your decision and your baby. No one can predict what will happen or how you will feel on the day.

twittle There are no stats that show that someone in a hospital with a dead baby would have had a different outcome birthing at home.
None.

However there is very real evidence that when things go wrong during homebirth, the outcome would have been very different in hospital with easy access to theatres and doctors and life saving opeations

Thank you Betty! I just wish people would be sensible with this.

Yeah if someone could provide evidence for a hospital death that could’ve been prevented by a home birth I’d like to see it.

**VioletteValentia some of your posts aid discussion, others just baffle me.

I support your choice for a section in hospital.

I support keeping a balance between doctors specialising in emergency delivery and midwives specialising in less medical births.

I support those that wish to choose a medical approach for whatever reason I don’t question them.

The skills of both dr and mw are needed. You seem to be of the opinion that a mw in an armchair is a hb. That is insulting.

We had this discussion pages ago. Midwives are PROFESIONALS

Now just stop with the insults. I can’t even think of anyway to insult someone choosing a section.

We had this discussion pages ago. Midwives are PROFESIONALS

They aren’t able to do what doctors can do. They can’t use hospital equipment at home.

And I haven’t insulted anyone.

YOU have with your midwife and an armchair comment.

They can do a lot at home.

You are not willing to listen to this as they can’t perform a c section....?

I've had 3 home water births and 1 hospital birth. My Mum is a retired Midwife and actually encouraged me to home birth.

My hospital birth was awful, 2 of the home births were perfect. The last didn't quite go to plan and ended up with a transfer to hospital, but choosing to have a hospital birth wouldn't have stopped what happened from happening, or made a difference to the outcome, and I'd opt for another home birth in a heartbeat.

Stuff other people's opinions, do your research, and if you're happy and confident in your choice, then go for it!

I think if you’ve had a birth where you and / or the baby have almost died and would have done without extensive medical equipment and assistance, the thought of a homebirth can be horrifying. I had my twins via emergency section and had I not gone in on a hunch exactly when I did, they’d be dead. My son was also diagnosed with a rare illness only because he was already in nicu and I’ve spoken to several mums of babies with the same thing who had home or MLU births, they weren’t diagnosed until much later and most had brain damage.

I’m sure if your experience was of a low risk birth you’d feel differently. I could never ever have a baby outside of a hospital with a nicu.

@TwittleBee thanks for all the info!

I think Being such an emotive and personal subject there will Be some reassured by statistics and others by gut/ stories / experience etc.

That’s why we need choice and supportive choice.

Not it’s your choice but your fault if something happens at a hb.

I will also say that in my experience it will be a lot to do with hb team. Mine were specifically hb only and their choice.

They can do a lot at home.

Blood transfusion? CPAP? Antibiotics?

oh goodness clearly if you are worried about a blood transfusion you do not choose a Homebirth. It’s not for you.

But because I do not worry about needing a blood transfusion and not having it to hand in the living room does not make me any less of a mother than you.

And for what it’s worth I am sorry if you had a scary birth experience. I do hope all was ok and I hope any subsequent went to plan.

I acknowledge I am fortunate.

You must do what you think best. I totally would hate the idea of a home birth and would want to be in hospital in case anything went wrong. But that;s me. Lots of people have gone for home births and are glad they did.

tammy I had a home birth and nearly died from blood loss. It hasn't put me off home birth for low risk patients. Like I said earlier on here if I had been at the mlu I would of been further from hospital anyway. I am not having anymore (age and another one would possibly kill me according to the consultant) but I still advocate home births for low risk. I'm not an evangelist about them but they are an amazing, much more relaxing way to give birth and that is massive to someone who has a diagnosed phobia of hospitals.

does not make me any less of a mother than you.

I don’t think I’ve said that. I wouldn’t say anyone is less of a mother.

There are two sets of risks. The first is that something could go wrong. When we call women "low risk" for homebirth this is the risk we are referring to. The second is that IF something goes wrong, the risk of it being catastrophic. This is the risk that I'm not comfortable taking.

Everyone's risk analysis is different. My risk assessment led me to decide that an ELCS for maternal request was the best option for me as a fit & healthy woman with no additional risk factors, as it was the safest for the baby and the only way to guarantee avoiding both injuries (while accepting the risks that come with surgery). Understandably not everyone would share my view.

I do take exception to the "it's natural/it's not an illness/it's what we're designed to do" line of thinking.

We are not designed to give birth - we have evolved to give birth. There is a difference. Nature is prepared to accept death and injury to mothers generally as long as the species is propagated. Obviously not an acceptable outcome for any individual!

Gennz

Completely agree.

There can be a certain complancency - just thinking that a hospital must be safe, doesn't actually make it so. I can't but help think of those hospitals like the one in Morecambe Bay a couple of years back where the standards of care were just not up to scratch, leading I believe to avoidable deaths.

VioletteValentia no you have not explicitly said that but you have said things which ceretainly imply it.

From your first few posts:
I think it’s incredibly selfish personally,

It's proper 'woke' bullshit.
My feelings exactly

So go and live in a country with no medical care and die of influenza at 35, like nature intended.

None of them constructive and in your posts you are clear that only a hospital birth medical is good enough. Not even a mlu. You state you might be on board with a mlu if attached to a hospital.

So I don’t think we can have a constructive conversation.

You have been shaped by your experience and I genuinely hope you Are all ok.

But facts are facts regarding hb, mlu etc.

Agree with you Peregrina

Stats aren't just talking about mild risks but serious ones such as serious complications and death. These are equal in both homebirth and hospital birth.

We need a supportive and understanding community around women who give birth who should be made to understand the risks of each and be free to choose either

Pikehau I don’t think anyone’s less of a mother. I think it’s a less safe choice, but that doesn’t mean I think someone’s less of a mother.

Gennz explained it well. There’s two types of risk, the risk of it happening (low) and the risk of if it does happen, it being awful (not low).

3rd DS was a planned home birth. No family nearby and I had the baby while the other 2 slept upstairs. Other than running out of gas & air there it was pretty straightforward.

I had a Home birth and it was by far the best experience I have had birthing. I was quick for a start and the midwives were checking after every contraction to check on baby via Doppler and I knew that if they were the least bit worried they would call an ambulance ASAP and it would take 7mins to transfer me. The same amount of time to transfer me if I went to our mlu so I felt completely safe. And in control.
Our after care also was second to none plus the fact I was already home and in my own space, could take a bath directly after too.
Best experience and I would urge anyone able to have a home birth to be open to it as an option.