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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Nose piercing.....how old is old enough?

106 replies

AjasLipstick · 20/03/2018 06:54

My 14 year old wants her nose pierced. She's at a school which allows one facial piercing in secondary school but I am not sure about this.

She's been asking since she was about 12 and I did have my own done when I was about 17....but it seems faddy and too young.

Any advice? Do I just say no?

OP posts:
Basecamp101 · 20/03/2018 09:50

I had mine done three times and wore two rings in one side and one in the other for many years. During which time i had pillar box red dreadlocks, loads of other peircings and was a senior manager in a national charity and then worked for the Office of the Deputy Prime Minister. Then I stopped wearing them and you could not tell I had holes there unless you looked really closely

I started wearing one again a few years ago and the hole had only healed on the inside.

If she has been asking for a couple of years it is not a fad. You may gain a lot of respect from her for recognising her wishes even if you don't agree. Chances are if she has wanted it done this long she will get it done as soon as possible anyway so you are merely postponing the inevitable.

MarkBorrigan · 20/03/2018 12:16

I had mine done at 18, having wanted in since I was your DDs age. I still have it many years later and get comments all the time on how nice it is. If it suits a person I think it can really look lovely. I'm not sure about letting her get it at 14 though.

ToastyFingers · 20/03/2018 13:29

I've had both my nose and septum pierced. I still wear I ring in my septum now as I find wearing a ring or stud in the side of my nose quite uncomfortable. My septum piercing is comfortable to wear and easy to hide, should I ever need to, so I'd encourage that one if she likes it.

As she's been asking for years already,its probably not a fad can you let her have it done for her next birthday?

MsHarry · 20/03/2018 13:34
  1. Younger than that and you have to give permission to the piercing studio. My DD had her nose done without my knowledge at 16 and I was very upset. I've got used to it now(she's 17.5). I wish school would ban silly coloured hair and face piercings. Wool make it easier for us.
ToastyFingers · 20/03/2018 13:38

MsHarry
A ban might deter some but not all. My school was very strict and still had multiple facial piercings and dyed hair from 14 onwards. I still do now, many years later.

MsHarry · 20/03/2018 13:40

DD's opinion is that she wanted it now while she is young and not in a sensible job. I didn't mind her having 2/3 ear piercings but really dislike the ring she has in her nose, though not as bad as a bull type septum one. I prefer her to where a stud but she like the ring. I barely notice it now though. She also had pink and green hair at one point but has gone sensibly brunette now. This too in time shall pass op but i think 14 is a little young. Tell her when she is 16, you'll support her.

MsHarry · 20/03/2018 13:40

My DD is very academic and ambitious, she would have respected a ban.

MsHarry · 20/03/2018 13:41

So many typos! Must read before I press post!

LemonBreeland · 20/03/2018 13:47

I think at 14 I would let her. A nose piercing is really not that obvious and it's better to pick your battles.

RoseWhiteTips · 20/03/2018 13:52

Never. It is an appalling “look”.

Deadwood58 · 20/03/2018 13:54

16+

No way I would let a 14 y/o

blackteasplease · 20/03/2018 13:56

18

SadieHH · 20/03/2018 14:02

At 14 if the school allows it I’d let her. My dds’ school would freak so there’s no chance for them but it’s really not a big deal. I’ve had mine for 20 years now and its so tiny it’s hardly noticeable and when it’s out there no hole or bump to see. It’s a very minor piercing.

Clawdy · 20/03/2018 14:02

My sister had hers done at sixteen, and then my gran said "Every time I look at you, Sarah, I think you've got a big bogey on your nose." It did put her off a bit......

GhoulWithADragonTattoo · 20/03/2018 14:05

18 is not unreasonable. Doing anything permanent to your face is and adult decision IMO.

MaMisled · 20/03/2018 14:07

Let her. It'll make her feel great! Research a reputable piercer of course.

angryburd · 20/03/2018 14:13

When I was about 12 my friend desperately wanted her nose pierced but het mum wouldn't have it. She ended up piercing it herself with an earring... and needless to say it got very infected.

Personally I don't see the harm in it. It might be better to take her to have it done somewhere professional rather than risk her either doing it herself or going to some cowboy.

BeyondThePage · 20/03/2018 14:17

Mine got hers at 16 - the local piercing/tattoo place would only do ears under 16 - and had a 2 month waiting list.

Totally disapprove of her putting holes in her face - but I'm guessing that is part of the attraction.

Blahdyblaah · 20/03/2018 14:22

I had mine done at 14 with a disposable gun and it never fully healed and was always sore. If she is set on getting it done take her to a tattoo/piercer as they will use a needle which is much less traumatic on the tissue

Iamagreyhoundhearmeroar · 20/03/2018 14:28

45... What schools allow facial piercings??

MsHarry · 20/03/2018 15:16

Yes they do at ours and it is an outstanding girls' school!

MsHarry · 20/03/2018 15:22

When my 16 yr old came home with her nose pierced I cried, ordered her to take it out. She wouldn't. She is a very clever girl and argued her case to which I had no answer.
1- I let her get her ears pierced at 9.Why are ears ok?
2-She is a student and this is the time for experimenting.She wants to be a lawyer and will need to be more sensible then.
3-If I made her remove it, she would just put it back in when at school.

I walked the dog, came home calmer and let it be. She finished the year on 10 GCSEs at A* and 1 A, got a job in spare time and is doing really well with her A Levels.

MsHarry · 20/03/2018 15:23

What i'm trying got say is that there comes a time when you can't force your teenage daughter to do anything. She is sensible about the important stuff and that's enough.

HeedMove · 20/03/2018 15:27

My 13 year old asked and I said yes. Its her body so I don't feel I should oppose when she's mature enough to decide what she wants to do with her own body. However, she went for belly button in the end.

KimmySchmidt1 · 20/03/2018 15:40

Depends - does she want to be poor for the rest of her life or would she like a shot at a well paid decent job? You can be as PC as you like, but you never see a professional person with a nose stud.

If she wants to be poor all her life then absolutely nothing matters does it? She may as well get everything pierced because there’s no point in bothering with school.