To be annoyed at DH

[Tinkerbell2003]

I have a DS (18 months). Yesterday DH insisted he had errands to run and was gone over 2 hours but was going on about how it was all a surprise. Fine.

Today he hands me a card and a mug (not wrapped, still in its amazon delivery box). Turns out it was the card he spent all that time getting yesterday. I ask him what we’re doing today and he confirms nothing planned, just pottering about.

AIBU to be upset that absolutely zero thought has gone into celebrating mother’s day?

Not zero
He got you a card and mug.

No, you are not. It's not about price, or being grabbing it's the thought. I've kinda got the opposite. Nice gifts but a miserable git of a husband. He uses it to score brownie points and then show how good he is. I currently go along with this and am grateful of course to the kids but I hate it. And if I happen to look sad at all there'll be a comment.

He still got you something, so I wouldn't say zero thought went in to it. Your idea of today is obviously different from his. Why not tell him what you want to do today?

My DH is working today, he left a card from DS and one from "the bump" on the table with some chocolates and a teddy bear. Nothing particularly amazing but I'll devour the chocs with a cuppa and the bear will join the collection of others. I've taken DS out for a walk in the woods and a play in the park. We stopped for some lunch and now we're home for nap time and I plan on napping along with him!

It's your day, do what you want with it.

I think YABU, a card a mug sounds fine to me!

What were you expecting? Did you think he was off planning something/buying gifts when he was out yesterday?

Don't let it spoil your day. If there's something you want to do today just suggest it and have a good time.

That sounds about right in our house, but DH always does any cooking or we have a takeaway on mother’s Day.

A card and mug is a nice gift IMO.

You can let this ruin your whole day or you can choose to have a nice day.

It's not bloody Christmas. I've got the cards the kids made at school plus some bulbs smallest child planted at beavers. Dh has done nothing, no card, no chocs, no flowers. Why should he? I'm not his mother. The children woke me with hugs and kisses and wishes for a happy mothers day I don't need anything more.

I’d suggest it depends on how high your expectations are. I got some flowers. Chocolate and a card. But dh ran out of the house to get them this morning because he admitted he had totally forgotten.

He got you something, I think maybe you have differing expectations. I would say after all I do would you think you cooking something special or going out for a meal is out of the question.

It's a case of singing from the same sheet.

Due to lack of wrapping the present I give him 5/10 for effort.

Jesus Christ, another one

" AIBU because I actually received a card and present?"

I think you're being very harsh to say zero thought, he got you a card and a gift. And let's be fair, you ain't his mum.

What did uou expect? Seems like the issue is uou want a lot more and don't appreciate the effort he put in to get you something from your kid. So how much do you need exactly?

Not sure what you expected as you have a DC that is too young to do anything themselves. A card and a mug sounds like a nice acknowledgement of the day. Next year is the one when you will no doubt get a handmade card plus a gift of a cereal box attached to a toilet roll with random tissue paper stuck over it.

A card and a mug you say? Stop the world I want to get off!

I think if he got you a mug from Amazon then he had clearly put some thought and planning into it, and obviously spent time choosing your card. It sounds like a nice gift IMO.
Ask him to pop a cup of tea in your mug and you're sorted

Jesus Christ, another one

Yup, you see it for birthdays and Xmas too on here. Where it's just not enough and people want more so don't appreciate what they do get.

I can't imagine complaining what my husband got for me from my 18 month old wasn't good enough and I wanted more. Just seems so bloody grabby.

Ah - Redskyatnight - I still have the ring made out of an egg box my DD gave me many years ago - I don't wear it quite as much these days though

I wouldn't call that zero thought either.

This is one of the few days a year I really dread going on MN. The others being Christmas and Valentine’s Day. Full of whingey, ungrateful gits. Every other thread is a moan.

Sooo, you should be super grateful to have done extra childcare in return for a card basically... Would be completely different if he'd taken your toddler with him whilst card shopping. But not if you get extra work whilst he has a nice browse on his own.

This is getting ridiculous now

I know Mother's Day tends to bring out the worst in a lot of MNetters every year, but this year seems particularly whinge infested.

YABU to call this 'zero thought'.

Yabu. You do realise some mums won't be getting anything at all today. Stop moaning!!

If you go all out for birthdays & Fathers Day, then I'd guess you would be miffed at differing standards.

Calling women out for their disappointment is a bit mean.

Ok it's better than nothing, but we don't know the dynamics of the relationship.

@PlayingwithKittens "It's not bloody Christmas". Never was a truer word spoken...

I was just chatting to a lovely young mum at the swimming pool with her toddler - her husband is in the forces so she is having to take herself out to lunch today as he's not around.

A card & a mug is not nothing.

Sorry @Playingwithkittens My bad...