would you employ household staff if money were no object?

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I'm a Nanny and I work in a household of 20+ staff. Mum doesn't work.
I was wondering today whether, if money were no object, I'd have a similar set up or not.

For context, there are several children, each with their own nanny and I manage those nannies, in a "Head Nanny" role.
There are also several housekeepers, butlers, maids, chauffeurs etc.
The family consists of the children and both parents.

I think I'd HAVE to go out to work, even though I wouldn't need to, as I get bored incredibly easily. But I suspect that I'd get bored of my job and then end up starting new things again and again. (In short, I'd suck at being wealthy)

Before anyone gets their knickers in a twist, this is in AIBU because it was going to be "AIBU to be uncomfortable with the idea of household staff?" but then I thought I'd get ripped apart for not being neutral

OP, I'm really interested in what your employers are like - do they spend much time with their kids? And you mentioned the maids working from morning till late at night - is that the same maids on really long hours, or do they have maids on shifts? Do they do some things for themselves, or would they literally ring a bell for a maid if they wanted a cup of tea?

The housekeeper cooks all meals and, yes, makes them tea when they text them (no old fashioned bell, sorry).
In this building the maids work those hours, yes. Its not shifts. In the "main" house (which is bigger) there are more staff (at least another 20) who serve the grandparents. I don't know their hours but I seem the same ones there at all hours.

OP, can I ask about the family you work for please... are they 'normal'? I mean, obviously they aren't quite 'normal', and are very wealthy/privileged, but are they normal as in, neither famous, nor royalty, and either family money, or fabulously high earner?

They have a Wiki page. I'm sorry to be a tease but for obvious reasons I can't say much.

DarthNigel That is my dayjob, I am by profession a ‘List Ticker’! Self-employed, doing admin in clients homes, I absolutely love it

I used to work as a nanny in Bel Air for a very well known family with an awful lot of staff and I much prefer what I do now.

Not to that extent.

A cleaner and gardener would be nice.

Yes, I’d have staff. For a start I’d only buy a small mansion that is treated as a home not an investment. So I’d only need a few staff. A cleaner that came in a couple times of week, a regular gardener, a part time chef that would cook a few times a week as well as teach DH and I cooking techniques. A personal assistant and a nanny to help with day to day stuff whilst we worked from home , contributing and hopefully making a differenc to society.

Without a shadow of a doubt!!!

This is the sort of thing I dream about whenever I see a Euromillions advert!

I’d have several cleaning staff to clean the whole house (I’d definitely have a house and it’d be bloody huge if I could employ lots of staff) every single day.

2 or 3 different housekeepers on rotation so there’s always one there at any given time of day.

Someone to prepare all of the ingredients for my meals for me and to wash everything up straight after and put everything away (don’t know if that would be the housekeeper or someone else). I’d cook though, as I pride myself on being good at it, and I enjoy it.

Gardeners.

A hairdresser and make up artist to visit every day to do their best with me.

A nanny on standby 24/7, just for those moments when you need to go to another room and use every swear word in existence and have 10 minutes peace. Also for ‘messy’ nappy changes, dealing with toddler meltdowns, and when I want to go to the toilet or shower without an audience. I’d also want the nanny to accompany me on any journeys so that they can sort out putting the DC in car seats, and helping to keep an eye on them when we’re out and about.

A driver.

A personal trainer to visit when I can be arsed to exercise.

Absolutely not. I value my privacy and I’d be worried about what they were saying about me behind my back!

InRainbows. A personal beautician would be amazing. 2 half days a week for blowdries, manicures, facials. A hairdresser once a month for cut and colour. And a doctor every 3/4 months for any non surgical interventions.

If money were no object, of course I'd have staff.

You wouldn't expect me to do the dusting in my 40-roomed country seat and several residences abroad all by myself, would you??

**

An old school friend has

• cook
• cleaner
• driver
• gardener

at each of her houses and she still has a down to earth attitude

Ive never employed a nanny despite having a lot of children but I do have a full time live in housekeeper as well as a the male equivalent who takes care of everyone else. I also have a team of 5 carers who help me provide the round the clock 2-1 care my son needs.

Ive no qualms whatsoever about having household staff. It means that after looking after my son on my own for a very very long time and not really being able to be the mum I wanted to be to my other children despite my best efforts, I'm now able to spend my days being the mum I want to one to them as well as to my my son. Im also able to be the granny I want to be. I should have done it about 20 years sooner.

Everyone lives at home, the house is built for it, though we're not all under the same roof. We rub along really nicely and I have nothing but the greatest respect for the people who make it possible for us to be the family we want to be.

who takes care of everyone else

Sorry, that should be take care of everything else.

He's worked for me for 30 years.

Yes, and I would treat them like they were made of gold am a cleaner myself atm.

I would hire a cleaner and someone to clean the car. I wouldn’t hire a nanny though

I'd love housekeeper/cleaner/chef/gardener.

Ooh lovely.

I'd have a cleaner, a masseuse and a beauty therapist to electrolysis my chin hairs and wax me. Would do my own cooking and shopping. Might have a chauffeur.

I already have a cleaner and as soon as we have a bigger house I'm getting an au pair so yes, if money was unlimited I'd definitely have a housekeeper, nanny, gardener, window cleaner and maybe a cook (although in Bertie Wooster's world a good cook is hard to find and difficult to hold on to). I want to outsource as many household tasks as I can.

I don't think many of us can compare or think about having 20 staff though. Even if they're all on 25hrs or so a week, that's what - 300k a year basic?

I suspect the OP is in the Middle East and though possible its highly unlikely the maids are earning more than 200 pound a month. The housekeepers and Butlers will be on more but whats probably happening is that each group of staff is made up of people from the Far East with a Western like the Op as a team leader. They'll also be lucky if they get home more often than once every two years. Thats generally the way it works though there are exceptions to this - rare exceptions.

I love gardening so I’d do that myself . Maybe get Monty over for a few days every year to give me pointers though

If I had Monty for a few days, gardening would be the last thing on my mind!

Even if I won millions, I'd still want a home that feels like a real family home, so not too big. I would have a gardener come in, say once a week, and also a cleaner a couple of times a week.

For everything else, I'd like a housekeeper. For this, I'd like to find a way to offer the job to someone for whom it would be a stepping stone out of an abusive relationship, either a partner or parents. I'd obviously need some way of checking this, but I recall one person posting some time back on the relationship board who was suffering MH issues and who was stuck living at home with her parents, the root of those issues. What struck me at the time was that the OP had no qualifications because her parents had effectively sabotaged them, she had no money, because her parents wouldn't let her claim benefits because "what would the neighbours think" and so she had no way out that she could see. It looked like her parents had her pegged as their skivvy for the rest of her life. One suggestion put to the OP at the time had been the idea of a live in hotel job, which is what set me thinking.

Someone like that, I'd offer the job as live in, and pay for study for whatever would set them free to a real future. Then, when they are ready, help them to move on to a healthy life. Then I'd look for another person help. All with no expectation of any sort of payback.

I think this motivation comes because I was lucky to have some resources to get me and DCs out of a bad relationship, and so often people feel trapped and need help. I'd use any money I won to help others in a personal way.

@WheresTheHooferDoofer

That's so lovely 💕

I don't think so, I'd hate having people in my space. I'd prefer to have an easy to look after home.

I'm sorry to be dull, but I'd hate a big expensive house and staff, and DEFINITELY no nanny or au pair. I want to look after my kids myself.

A friend does mow my lawn and spruce the garden a bit, mates rates - that's it!

I work for someone who has an assistant, housekeeper, gardner, cleaner, occasional cook and sends out laundry. They don't have a nanny now children are older.

I would love an assistant and housekeeper. Maybe occasional gardener and cleaner to help with deep cleans too. Live out though.

I've been wondering about options for when dc are in secondary school. I'm uncomfortable with them being in the house alone from 330-6 or 7. Does a live out housekeeper role exist so someone would be there, to clean, cook, do laundry, meal prep a couple of evenings a week. Not to childmind or babysit. But be someone 'there' if dc needed them? If so what would it cost?

OP, it sounds awful if they make their maids work those hours. I'm guessing you're not in the UK? It makes me sad when rich people exploit other people when they could easily employ double the number on a shift system. Are the maids free to leave if they want to?