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Original poster

To be peed off at getting ‘told off’ for working at home

179 replies

Hatemyjob2 · 02/03/2018 13:31

Started new job in January. Okayish, better than last one, but micro- managed to the hilt.

Anyway you may have noticed a spot of bother with the weather, so I asked to work from home. Told OK, as long as I can’t get in. Anyway oh’s office is closed for safety reasons, so I’d have to trek 1/2 mile to the bus for 6.30. Pavements are like ice and I have osteoporosis.

So I log on at 8am and get stuck in. Then I get a sarky message: where are you? Is public transport not working. I explain that I couldn’t get in and have been roundly told off like a child and apparently they will have words with me on Monday.

OH has said to start looking for a new job and I’m inclined to agree now.

OP posts:
StepAwayFromGoogle · 02/03/2018 16:45

There's a couple of things that need explaining, though: Were work expecting you to confirm on the day that you couldn't get in and would be WFH? That's policy where I work. They confirmed you could, you didn't confirm that you would be.
Second, were all your other colleagues able to get in by public transport and you weren't? If that's the case, then they might legitimately question why you couldn't.
Thirdly, do they know about your osteoporosis and that it would make it difficult to walk to public transport? If your husband was off, and could drive you in or drop you at the bus station, it's difficult to see how that would be an excuse. Unless everyone struggled to get into the office by car/public transport and you are being singled out.

McTufty · 02/03/2018 16:53

@romainecalm

Sorry for what is probably a very stupid question but are you actually OP's manager?

RedSkyAtNight · 02/03/2018 17:09

As none of us know where OP lives it's hard to say whether she should have made more effort to get in. Clearly many of her colleagues got in, public transport is still running and there's no message of "do not travel". The fact that others live in more snowbound areas and have been told not to come in is irrelevant. OP was told she could work from home if she couldn't get in. This wasn't blanket permission to work from home . If she genuinely couldn't get in, that's a different matter, but from her OP it sounds like her DH could have given her a lift to the bus stop, or indeed all the way in to work.

Heratnumber7 · 02/03/2018 17:11

Give them a long talking to about judging people by their output, and not by presenteeism. There's loads of stuff on t'internet you could quote at them.

SouthWestmom · 02/03/2018 17:19

Sock monster whether you have to take medication isn't factored in as classing someone as disabled. It might support a need for PIP depending on what it involved. Conversely if medication fully controlled symptoms it might make their impact less.

RomaineCalm · 02/03/2018 17:30

@McTufty

No, I'm not. Smile

I just wonder whether there are two sides to this!

DalekDalekDalek · 02/03/2018 17:47

The irony is that if you had slipped on the ice and broken your leg you would have caused a lot more disruption to your workplace with absence.

They would have then been asking why you hadn't wfm when you had been given permission to do so.

Time to be looking for a new job I think OP.

MrsMozart · 02/03/2018 17:50

Goodness me! You're a grown up. Producing work. I'm with your OH. Go work for a company that doesn't have its head up its arse.

OllyBJolly · 02/03/2018 17:52

Give them a long talking to about judging people by their output, and not by presenteeism. There's loads of stuff on t'internet you could quote at them

With only two months' service I think this is pretty bad advice!

The OP was told she could work from home if she couldn't get to work. Obviously, lots of her colleagues could get to work therefore the manager is questioning why she didn't arrive. Fair enough, no reason to get shirty so early on in a new role. And companies can have quite legitimate reasons for people not to work from home at will.

Original poster
Hatemyjob2 · 02/03/2018 17:59

Sorry, didn’t mean to drip feed. It’s the same person who said I could, who Skyped me the message. I started at 8 and was going to let them know before they got into the office at 9, as there wouldn’t have been anyone there, but she messaged me just before I was about to.
My oh is relevant as he works nearby and runs me in. I get the bus when he isn’t around.
My DS went into town this afternoon and said all buses were really late, so even if I had got up to the stop, I still wouldn’t have been in by the time she messaged me.
I don’t actually like working from home, it’s not like I did it for a duvet day.
It pees me off as I’m old enough to be their mum and they treat me like a child! I’ve even had her stand over my shoulder and read my emails to clients before I send them. Aaargh. I left a 10 yr job (teaching so a bit minging) for this as well.

OP posts:
Dungeondragon15 · 02/03/2018 18:05

So you hadn't even had a chance to let them know! She sounds like a really bad manager so I would certainly look for another job. I used to work for a micromanager and it can really wear you down.

pinkpantherpink · 02/03/2018 18:07

If you're not happy, look for a different job.

As a manager, I'd rather you'd sent me a text to give me the heads up about working from home at 8. Timing of your contact may make a difference.

Perhaps you're not 'conforming'' to expectations.... managing isn't easy and sometimes managers are not good with people.

You ought to have a conversation with your manager about expectations wrt working from home. Inclement weather often affects medical conditions and sometimes that means reasonable adjustments are needed. Good luck OP.

LaurieMarlow · 02/03/2018 18:07

That controlling 'parent/child' relationship they want to have with you would send me running for the hills. It's a sign of piss poor management.

Definitely start looking elsewhere.

mrsm43s · 02/03/2018 18:19

Why could your DH have not run you in today? Or at least to the bus stop? It really doesn't sound as though today fulfilled the conditions of unable to get into the office. Buses were running and roads were clear enough for your DH to get into town.

I'd also expect that if a colleague who was scheduled to start at 8am was not going to be in the office until 9am or later , that they'd call and let their manager know that they were going to be late - before their start time - even if that meant leaving a voicemail or sending a text/email.

It seems to me that the big issue here is lack of communication. You need to let your manager know if, for any reason, you will not be where they expect you to be at the time they expect you to be. This is absolute basics, and is generally expected by all employers.

Electricgobblers · 02/03/2018 18:24

You,didn’t even try to get in. You didn’t follow the reason that they gave you. They said as long as you couldn’t get in. You could have got in and you didn’t even try.

TruJay · 02/03/2018 18:30

"Osteoporosis isn't a disability"

No but it is fucking horrific. My grandma had it severely and once coughed and several vertebrae crumbled. It was also the reason she died, sitting in her inquest listening to the coroner read out what happened to her bones and how that killed her was quite simply nightmare worthy but yeh OP get off your arse and walk on that ice and risk a fall Hmm

SockMobster · 02/03/2018 18:31

@Noeuf It has been for me - the fact I take medication to control my symptoms means I am classified as disabled under the equality act (unsure if it's all illnesses or just the one I have, but I do have this is writing and it has been seen by lawyers).

missymayhemsmum · 02/03/2018 18:35

Look, OP, you are new. You have not yet built up your manager's trust in you. Hence the micro-managing until she is sure she doesn't need to (hopefully). You are used to being an established professional, but in this job you aren't, yet. She doesn't yet know that you are someone who will work solidly from home to get the job done, rather than someone who will take a pisstake day off the moment there is a sprinkle of snow.

On Monday, explain that you were about to call her at 9 to confirm you would be working from home (as agreed) when she called you. Clarify whether she would have preferred an earlier call/text? Explain that you haven't previously mentioned your disability osteoporosis as it doesn't generally affect your work and hasn't been relevant, but it does mean that walking 1/2 a mile to the bus stop on icy pavements is more difficult for you than it would be for some colleagues. Therefore a reasonable adjustment is for you to work from home rather than risk a broken hip.

Partypopper123 · 02/03/2018 18:40

Oh god, this sounds exactly like something my ex-boss would do. I got fucking sick of his micro managing ways I left at the end of last year.

SouthWestmom · 02/03/2018 18:43

Interesting @sockmonster because it’s not a condition of being disabled.
Anyway, off topic - what my original point was was that osteoporosis could mean theop wasn’t disabled, depending on impact of the condition

StepAwayFromGoogle · 02/03/2018 19:07

Have to say that it sounds like you could have got in, OP, either a lift from your DH or he could have dropped you at the bus stop. I agree with PPs who say that you haven't really built up the level of trust you need to WFH after 2 months, especially If everyone else in the office got there. Although the reading emails before they are sent thing would drive me mad too. Maybe just clarify on Monday what future expectations are, especially as I assume you are still in your probation period.

Dipitydoda · 02/03/2018 19:16

What a bunch of idiots. If you could do the same job wfh as in the office what does it matter? Surely anyone would rather people were safe. It’s about time wfh was encouraged more to cut back on the congestion, pollution and cost of working. Most office based jobs can be done just as easily from home ( and often more productively) if they are such a control freak they need to be sat next to you to ensue you’re doing your job yes I would look for somewhere else

DailyMailReadersAreThick · 02/03/2018 19:18

Started new job in January. Okayish, better than last one, but micro- managed to the hilt.

Oh god, get out now! Maybe you're more tolerant than me but being micromanaged is hell on earth.

Ginger1982 · 02/03/2018 19:33

Did DH just not fancy getting out his bed to run you in?

anneoneill · 02/03/2018 19:52

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.