Ok, my ds is y6. He has just turned 11.
He's pretty normal, pretty average. Has a big bunch of friends, there are a lot of boys in the class generally. He seems to be as popular as he needs to be, and happy most of the time.
He can get very teary and intense about things, more so than, for example, his dsis (age 7), who is as hard as nails slightly tougher in some ways.
Anyway, one of his 'things' is going for a pee in the loo just before we leave the house almost every single time we go out. Sometimes he will go for a pee, we will then travel a mile to someone's house or something, and he'll immediately go when he gets there etc. He's known for it (amongst his mates whom I have heard josh him about it). I try not to make a thing of it. Sometimes I do say "what, again?" in exasperation, which probably isn't great of me.
So, new teacher this term. She has said that dc in class should not be asking to go to the toilet so often. She apparently thinks it can be a 'distraction technique' (the school's/her phrase) rather than a genuine need. 'If this appears to be the case the teacher may say (pupils) will have to wait until a natural break in learning'. The school goes on to say, (a bit odd imo): 'However, in the vast majority of cases the children will have free access to the toilet'. (-seems to be a light threat in there somewhere!).
I was driving my ds and his friend home a week or so ago and they were talking about how 'unfair' it was that my ds wasn't allowed to go to the toilet that day, first time I'd been made aware of it.
I generally don't want to blow it up into a big thing so I said to let me know if there's a problem again and I'll see what I can find out, that sort of thing.
In his home book today the teacher has written that he took too long between lunch and the next class (he went to the loo), and that he is using allowed loo breaks to 'contest' her rules by deliberately taking too long during these 'legitimate' breaks ( the children are generally not allowed to go during class any more).
He has no idea what she is talking about, I have explained what she is saying as objectively as possible. He says he was in the loo and he needed to go. She has taken points off him and wants me to 'talk' to him about this!
Aibu thinking this is overkill? My view of my ds is undoubtedly coloured, but I am also aware he is a bit of a follower not a leader generally, and I doubt he would deliberately try to 'contest' her authority. Without doubt he can be silly, loud, and is dreadful at paying attention, but he's not a calculating little sod, iyswim.
This has only been a school-wide issue since this teacher started, it seems to be a 'thing' now.
I would just like to know what teachers on here think, and parents of course.
I have replied in his book to say I do not want him to be punished for wanting to go to the loo, but I have said I will of course talk to him about any other matters that might arise. (And of course I have spoken to him about this issue anyway).
Bit long, sorry.