A man just shouted at me in the street

[Dallia]

“Why are you wearing a curtain?”

I kind of smiled awkwardly and carried on crossing the road to him shouting “oi, you, I’m talking to you!”

I was absolutely mortified, lots of people were watching but no one said anything.

Why do people do this? He seemed like a “normal person” and it was really intimidating. He turned back to look and I thought he was going to start following me. Has anyone ever had weird random things shouted at them in the street, or is it just me

For the record I was wearing a stripy maxi dress as I was on my way to get a spray tan. Really wish I’d had a witty comeback.

And I bet they go home and wouldn't dare to do the same to the (poor unfortunate) women in their lives

A couple of years back,my friend and I were leaving a pub. Sitting at a table near the door were several rough looking blokes. As we passed,one of them looked at us and said in a loud voice 'OK there fatty?' Without missing a beat,my friend shot back 'Yes thanks,we're fine. How about you,you ugly twat?' His friends fell about laughing.

Happens to me all the time, and yes it's always men.

I can't remember the amount of times things have been shouted it must be in it's thousands by now. When i was younger it was often 20+ a day. Some about my body. Some about what type of person i was. Some about what i was wearing. Some about what they would like to do with my body. Some about how attractive they found me. Some about how repulsive they found me - often both on the same day. Lots by builders. or drivers. Some out of office windows. Somebody bus drivers and tube workers. Some even by policemen. Some when i was in school uniform. Some when i was on crutches and struggling to walk. Some when i was pregnant. I subconsciously often hold my breath and tense my stomach when walking past building sites, pubs and groups of men/teenagers etc.

One of the most outrageous was when someone dressed as Santa asked me to sit on his face. I just went blank and couldn't really compute what had happened.

This sort of thing puts me off going cycling or even walking.
I assume these pathetic creatures don’t have partners, but you have to wonder if they have any respect for the other women in their lives - their mothers and sisters etc.

From now on, you need to be prepared with the standard MN response:

'I'm sorry, did you MEAN to be so rude?'

When I was a teenager walking to work, a guy walked past me and said “I would let you sit on my face if you weren’t so fat”.

I’ve never forgotten that.

I was telling my DP that this is really common for women! He was shocked. Never happens when I’m with him of course!

As a teenager, I had 2 lads walk behind me saying 'Eurgh, you never get a fit ginner do you?' Following me right up the street saying how disgusting I looked. Had a lot of things said while young but this one stayed with me. Was really upset by it. Christ, I would give them so much abuse back if it happened now!

I think a cheery smile and the middle finger are useful in this situation (especially when the best put down eludes me).

See this is the sort of shit that actual, real, from birth women live with day in day out. This nasty abuse is part of what being a woman entails.

Yes, @Proper - and it is boring and wearying.

The trouble with smart come backs is that for every bloke who takes it you will find far more that dont and are more likely to escalate it. They do it for dominance and the second you put them down the more angry they are going to be.

Ignoring is the best way to react (or not) for your personal safety. Calling them out wont stop this kind of twat so why risk it?

They’re sad fuckers who don’t even know you. School bullies who never grew up.
My dd, 16, (adopted, lots of issues) was screaming at me that I was a fat fucker when she was drunk in A&E the other night - mortifying and extremely hurtful. At least I managed to retort that yes, I was fat, but at least I wasn’t a drunk.
I don’t know why people have to be so cruel.

I was driving home from work one night, years ago when I was young, my husband pulled up next to me. Car on the other side started shouting comments to me. Husband opened his window and er invited me to go make love with him. Quite explicit. I smiled and nodded enthusiastically, husband made some gestures. Rude man sat there with his mouth hanging open, obviously thinking two random people had just hooked up at the traffic lights. It was funny but I did wonder if next time he wanted to harass a young woman he might just try the same technique and get punched.

How would you feel if you found out that your hitherto polite, PC partner engaged in this behaviour when they were with their mates? I seriously think I would have to end it, instant revulsion.

One of my friends had a potato thrown at her out of a van window on Pitshanger Lane and the blokes laughed and shouted DOG at her after if hit her. That was her punishment for not being attractive enough for them to fancy her i suppose. Some men feel very angry if they think you aren't making the required effort for them. How dare you not want them to fuck you. Regardless of who they are and what they look like. You must be kept in your place and know they are in charge.

I would dump a man that carried on like that, no question.

On my way to work one day, a man looked me up and down and said: Seagull legs.

Out walking my two dogs, wearing a t-shirt and I get: That's a nice pair you've got there.

Bizarre. I've never found it necessary to make those sort of comments to strangers, male or female.

Men can't they be chemically adjusted? Um, there are loads of threads on that subject

I LOVE the idea of women carrying massive rocks around to chuck at the cars of men who do this, so much better than trying to think of a retort. Imagine their faces if you just suddenly fecked a boulder at their car, amazing.

My DH was shocked too Polarbearflavour. I'd never thought to mention it to him until the #metoo thing was all over our social media last year. He knew it happened, but seemed to think it was something that might happen once or twice if you were unlucky or dressed in a particularly provocative way. I make a point of mentioning every time I get callcalled or rubbed up against/groped now. I said I need him to understand the world our DD has been born into

I remember being on the bus on the way home from school, hideous bottle green uniform and me looking a mess as only a spotty 13 year old can. Group of lads were making fun of me. Absolutely horrible.

Couple of years later I was in the park, had my Twiggy hairdo, mini skirt and skinny rib jumper I thought I was gorgeous and was happily walking my dog when I saw the ring leader and my heart sank. He then came over started chatting me up. I was smiling and going along with it and then he asked me out and I said I wouldn't be seen dead with someone so rude and nasty. Of course he had no idea what he had done but it cheered me up.

MrsKoala you've reminded me that I got the remains of a Macdonalds cola lobbed at me from a car window while I was waiting at a pedestrian crossing once. I'd got dressed up for a night on the randan and I'd been feeling pretty good - until then.

Oh god I hate this so much. I had a man shout "buy some slimfast" out of a car window as I was walking home (from Weight Watchers funnily enough - way to ruin my day!). One time some boys threw stones at me because my bum was big (I was 16 and a size 10 at the time). It's usually men and they are just dicks.

And also a bloke in a pub grabbed my arms (bingo wings) and said “I’ve seen less wings in a KFC”. Charming.