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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think I’m not a weirdo for wanting a non-wired bra!

119 replies

OriginalGeordie · 17/02/2018 20:54

I’ve finally finished feeding my last child! I want pretty new bras to celebrate after years of ugly, washed out feeding bras. After all these years wearing feeding/maternity bras, I can’t abide wiring of any sort! With this in mind I took myself off to my nearest M&S today to see what they had. I had measured myself beforehand as I don’t like the way M&S does it.

I was happily browsing when lady came up and asked if I needed any help. I asked if that was all they had in non wired as they were really old fashioned looking. At that she looked me up and down and said that younger ladies like me (I’m late 30’s) usually wear “normal bras” and they only sold those kind to older ladies.

I felt really self conscious after this and didn’t really want to stand there explaining things to her and muttered that it was ok I’d leave it. Nope she was off on a crusade to prove to me I really wanted a wired bra and asked my size, I told her she told me she didn’t think so, I stood my ground on this. So anyway I was handed about 5 bras to try. In the end I hung them back up whilst her back was turned and left. I’m ordering online from now on, I don’t care if I have to send them all back if it means I avoid an experience like that again!

AIBU for not liking wired bras? Also AIBVU for actually wanting non wired ones to be pretty?

OP posts:
Didntcomeheretofuckspiders · 18/02/2018 08:48

The M&S I was in on Friday had loads! And lots of pretty ones! But they only came in 32-42 A-E, much to my frustration. (I’m a 28-30 Gish)

I have a couple of nice ones from figleaves (own brand) that were about £7 in the sale though! Freya Deco non-wired is also a favourite of mine.

woodhill · 18/02/2018 08:49

Fantasie are excellent but I always buy wired bras.

Aeroflotgirl · 18/02/2018 08:52

Or what i do is measure in Bravissimo try and few on, and go on e bay to fine the style and make, usually half the price.

Aeroflotgirl · 18/02/2018 08:52

Fantasie, Freya, Royce are very good soft cup bra makes, they make lovely sexy comfortable soft cup bras.

olympicsrock · 18/02/2018 08:54

I like the sweaty betty sports bras. Very soft and comfortable- I find myself wearing them every day...

PinkSparklyPussyCat · 18/02/2018 08:59

I can’t imagine they’d support anything though. Am I wrong? I’m a HH and want everything lifted and separated. I have to say my only experience of non wired bras is sports bras which just clamp everything down!

Horsemad · 18/02/2018 09:01

What is a bralette?

originalusernamefail · 18/02/2018 09:05

Go to a ‘proper’ independent bra shop. I’ve been let down by M&S, John Lewis, Bravissimo etc but the lady in my local has never let me down. If you decide to revisit wires, try Primadonna bras. I have x3. They are expensive but last well and at a 36G they are so comfortable and supportive I feel better than when wearing no bra at all!

Olga81 · 18/02/2018 09:07

That Molke size guide, a 30aa needs the same size as a 30ff??

I'd love a non-wired bra, but anything without and i just get a uniboob

Joskar · 18/02/2018 09:14

Molke!

I'm a complete convert. I thought I'd always want a wired bra but Molke is the bomb.

TurquoiseDress · 18/02/2018 09:22

Don't worry you're not a weirdo!

I've been wearing non-wired bras since around 2012 and I'm 39.

No particular reason, think I got some M&S non wired bras in the sale and loved how the felt, so never went back to wired bras!

MissWilmottsGhost · 18/02/2018 09:22

I've always hated wired bras.

When I was young I just went without or wore crop top style, but my boobs got bigger as I got older and I realised one day I was getting very bouncy and gritted my teeth and wore proper bras for a few years.

I tried and tried to like wired bras because there was fuck all choice in non wired. I found balcony style ones wearable, the 'normal' kind were always horribly uncomfortable. And no it isn't a measurement issue, I have been measured in many different places (always 30E or 32DD) and tried a hundred different makes. They are all awful.

When I was pregnant I got some non wired maternity/bf bras and I was so happy. I had forgotten how much more comfortable non wired was. I wore them for about 2 years after DD was born, then decided I really couldn't really wear maternity all my life and went searching for non wired bras again.

I have previously worn M&S non wired t shirt bras, although they are now marketed as 'first bra' as if only pre teens wear non wired Hmm and the straps are thinner now and not as comfortable as they used to be.

I'm going back to the crop top pull on style tbh, they were always the best. Modern ones often have a bit of padding that stops nipples poking out when its cold, which was the only thing I didn't like before.

Aeroflotgirl · 18/02/2018 09:48

Just looked on Molke, I guess they are an acquired taste, they look more like bralettes, and they don't look very supportive or flattering. When I was feeding, I used to have Hotmilk bras, which were softcup nursing bras, they looked flattering, sexy and comfy.

Aeroflotgirl · 18/02/2018 09:49

here is their website uk.hotmilklingerie.com/

Branleuse · 18/02/2018 09:52

look up molke, hiccups and juice and creasefree clothes bras.

I now wont wear anything else unless the outfit absolutely demands it, and my boobs have never been happier

specialsubject · 18/02/2018 09:52

Wires are uncomfortable but the real nightmare is itchy lumpy ugly lace, and that seems compulsory. Wearing bras less and less now as can't get any.

SmiledWithTheRisingSun · 18/02/2018 09:53

I have worn wired bras for most of my bra-wearing life... but after BFing 2 babies and being left with gigantic norkage, I'm finding the wires hurt my ribs. Might give this a go. Can you still get the uplift sans wires though? Hmm

DelphiniumBlue · 18/02/2018 09:57

I got a " fuller cup" bralette from M&S yesterday, also non wired lightly padded t shirt bra in same shop. Both quite comfy, 38 DD. Still not perfect though, so my quest continues.
I have tried removing wires from wired bras, I think it's a big mistake, they are designed for some of the support to come from the wiring. If you want non wired, you need to get specifically designed non wired bras in order to get adequate support.

Oldraver · 18/02/2018 09:58

I tend to wear soft bras to work and a Shock Absorber Classic if I need less squished contour. At home I dont wear a bra.

I find most bras uncomfortable due to the fabric especially as lot are heat sealed at the back.

M+S now do a soft and comfy fabric bra similar to the post surgery bras...which I tried on accidently, loved them put back

Hownow39 · 18/02/2018 09:59

Asda do great ones for big boobs

TwoShades1 · 18/02/2018 10:00

I’m in Australia so no help with stores. But ur not weird for wanting non wired bras. I have a good range of both wired and non wired bras. Their certainly seem to be plenty available where I shop so people obviously people buy them.

CottonSock · 18/02/2018 10:01

Try a triumph magic wire. Really comfortable

QuiteCleanBandit · 18/02/2018 10:02

Those Molke bras look awful-like someone has chopped up a pair of Y fronts Shock
If you are unconfortable then you havent been fitted properly.

booellesmum · 18/02/2018 10:04

I prefer non wired but when I do find a nice one it never has matching pants.
I often feel there's a gap in the market for matching underwear where the bra is non wired.

Oldraver · 18/02/2018 10:11

However, big thumbs up for using women with a range of body shapes and sizes to advertise their products.

Lovely website...though what looks like a photoshopped thigh gap on one of the models doesn't look nice