To think I’m not a weirdo for wanting a non-wired bra!

[OriginalGeordie]

I’ve finally finished feeding my last child! I want pretty new bras to celebrate after years of ugly, washed out feeding bras. After all these years wearing feeding/maternity bras, I can’t abide wiring of any sort! With this in mind I took myself off to my nearest M&S today to see what they had. I had measured myself beforehand as I don’t like the way M&S does it.

I was happily browsing when lady came up and asked if I needed any help. I asked if that was all they had in non wired as they were really old fashioned looking. At that she looked me up and down and said that younger ladies like me (I’m late 30’s) usually wear “normal bras” and they only sold those kind to older ladies.

I felt really self conscious after this and didn’t really want to stand there explaining things to her and muttered that it was ok I’d leave it. Nope she was off on a crusade to prove to me I really wanted a wired bra and asked my size, I told her she told me she didn’t think so, I stood my ground on this. So anyway I was handed about 5 bras to try. In the end I hung them back up whilst her back was turned and left. I’m ordering online from now on, I don’t care if I have to send them all back if it means I avoid an experience like that again!

AIBU for not liking wired bras? Also AIBVU for actually wanting non wired ones to be pretty?

Bralettes are really in fashion so the m and s lady needs to get with it!

I have loads of pretty lace ones and I have more sporty ones for everyday wear.

I've never yet found a wired bra that isn't absolute torture to wear. And that includes the ones selected for me by Rigby & Peller. I wore one of their choices for work and by the end of the day wanted to weep.

Non-wired all the way for me - Anita Jana are my current favourites, even if not very glamorous. But I'm sure the "grimacing in pain" look isn't sexy either!

The mistake you made was going to M&S and thinking you could get a supportive bra if your over a D cup. Their bras are pants, you need a decent make. I personally like wired when you get a good fit. But an ill fitting one can be painful.
Mine are mainly Fantasie they fit my shape well, often pick them up in the sales.

You can remove wires from bras.

Wait does your bra still "work" if you do this? I need to know before I start chopping bras.

And it's totally "normal" to not want all that scaffolding around the boobage. I did away with padding years ago. Now if I can have a padless, wireless bra that isn't a Molke (as fab as they look they only have small/reg in 2 styles)

I have a few freya bralettes and they are lovely (but sweaty )

I don’t wear wire bras. I wear crop tops or GAP non wired ones.
I’m a 28DD and do not care.

Oh and I’m 22, very normal and my friends are about 50:50 split on wired vs nonW

I am a 32 FF and could not remove the wires from bras without it being totally unsupportive. Fine if you have small breasts, but if you are bigger you need a proper soft cup bra that will provide support. I tell you asap bigger boobed lady, they are very supportive and comfy. Soft cup all the way😁

singasong i am henceforth adopting your clothing rules.

And ROFL to whoever said M&S bras are pants.

I DONT WANT SEXY. I WANT COMFORTABLE.

thank you.

Interesting thread. I'm in my forties and have never been able to wear wired bras, the options for unwired has never been great in all those years, but from this thread it seems like there is finally choice out there. I'm currently wearing hardly worn nursing and maternity bras that I found in a drawer after my last bras wore out.

www.uniqlo.com/uk/en/product/women-wireless-bra-beauty-light-400269.html?dwvar_400269_color=COL19&dwvar_400269_size=SMB002&cgid=IDwireless-braslight1432&utm_medium=affiliate-content&utm_source=affiliate_window&awc=6771_1518937144_120646c9447e2041cf33bc7e483d16d3

I just saw these recommended on the pool and thought of you OP.

Ah, perhaps not for an FF.

YANBU! I'm still bfing so haven't worn a wired bra in a long time but can't see myself going back. M&S do pretty stretchy lace bralettes. They don't give loads of support obviously but they're pretty good as an alternative to a wired bra. Also ASOS have some good non wired ones.

I recently got some from Victoria’s Secret, lovely colours, good support and sooooo comfy!

"What's an old lady bra?"

A poor choice of term which erroneously assumes frumpiness is age related.

I was going to suggest Bravissimo. Pink won't be any good for OP, their biggest cup size is DDD - Victoria's Secret go bigger though. ASDA have really good bras, and they are so cheap you could experiment with just taking the wire out and seeing if enough support remains. PP is right that this is less likely to work in bigger sizes, but it is down the the whole bra structure/fabric/fir in your body, so worth an experiment just in case you're lucky.

Otherwise, you could look at maternity bra ranges (not feeding bras, pregnancy ranges). I know you're trying to move in to a new chapter, but it's just a range name for comfy, supportinve bras for heavier breasts. Some sports bras might work too. Shock Absorber non-wired has soft cup styles (not the squish em down running racer-back styles) which I find very comfy and which come in strong colours.

It’s funny, I couldn’t wait to get back to underwired bras after breastfeeding my first child. By the time I had my second child, there were underwired nursing bras available so I didn’t have to suffer non-wired at all. I hate them - I found they didn’t offer enough support (I’m a 32G) and they gave me a horrible shape, very matronly.

But each to their own, and I hope you find some you like

And I don’t think you’re a weirdo either

Not weird at all!

Try &otherstories for some gorgeous ones

What's an old lady bra? It's probably just code for a bra that is designed to be comfortable rather than sexy. Though well designed bras can be both of course.

Most bras these days are just foam cups with decor. It’s really hard to find non padded and non wired. I bought a new sports bra the other day and tried it on the morning of a Zumba class later that night. It was so comfy I left it on all day. I’m 32DD and it was cropped top style but very supportive.

I've been wearing non wired bras since my mid twenties, much comfier. Triumph and Glamorise are good.

YANBU! I can't stand wired bras either. I tend to wear sports bras most of the time for that reason. (I've even seen wired sports bras in the shops these days. Jeez, how can they be comfortable?) I got a lovely set of Calvin Klein undies for Christmas with a non wired bra, which looks great. In most shops the pretty bras are under wired and the frumpy looking 'comfort' bras are unwired. Why can't we have pretty and comfortable bras? I bet most are designed by men who have no clue how they feel, that's why.

I found Bravissimo soft cup bras, to be sexy and comfy, really lovely bras. I am a FF so not small, and tgey offer great support. If your big chested anything over a C, taking the wire out won't help and won't offer support, as the wire is part of the support.

John Lewis have lovely good quality soft cup bras. I used to have Supermarket ones but found the support and quality not good, in comparison. Its better if your big chested, to pay for a good quality soft cup bra.