To wonder why the older generation can't admit that things are harder for millennials?

[ExtraPineappleExtraHam]

So we just had our meeting with a mortgage advisor. They will lend my dp £45,000 (not even enough for a bedsit in this town) and so I'm not even bothering to do mine as I earn less. We work very hard (44 hours and 27 hours) we just have low paid jobs and pay childcare for two under 5's!
I talked to my stepdad who compared it to when he had to borrow £36,000 to buy his first house in the early eighties. That was 3 times his salary and his wife stayed at home. He paid it off in six years. It's not the same. He was given a mortgage which was enough to buy a nice house in an area close to family and where he worked. He didn't have to have a bank manager saying 'well if you move to Wales or up north?' He didn't have to rent forever and have nothing to pass down to his children. It's not the same!

If the worst thing that happens to my 18 & 16 yr old sons is that they can't get on the property ladder I would be happy.

Seriously. Not owning your own home, or having to save and wait much longer for it, is not the worst thing that can happen to our children.

I don't know why they have to acknowledge of feel any guilt about it personally, no-one is promised a better existence or any easier ride than their ancestors, it's just that for most cases that has been the case and worked in their favour, and in some, like affordability of housing, hasn't. I say that as a 30 year old.

Extrapineapple I don't think people are having a go or being deliberately nasty, but did you not consider that doing a degree in English lit was not really the best choice for a high earning career.
I think some young people probably are being encouraged into degree courses that aren't necessarily the best long term choices, and there certainly some social changes which should never have happened. Selling off and not replacing the best council housing stock comes to mind, though many older people did actually stand up against it at the time. We didn't all vote for Maggie you know.

It does appear that there is some kind of backlash going on with the younger generation blaming their elders for what they haven't got, or achieved for themselves. Do they forget that the older generation didn't have credit? If you needed something, you saved and then bought it - there was no such thing as getting something on credit, apart from a mortgage, so people had to do without. That included holidays, washing machines, dryers, phones (landlines, people, landlines!!), cars, gym memberships, days out costing money etc etc

My parents had to live with extortionate interest rates whilst down to 3 day weeks

Although my folks have always been in work they were buying in the 70's/80's when interest rates shot up to 16%

When I first bought in the early 90's the rate was 12%...we thought ourselves 'lucky' to of got a two year fix at 9%

OP life is way better for Millenials in some ways. For white able bodied middle class men it is often harder.

Roussette Yes a girl at class in my school had a divorced mother. My mum was friendly to her. I was a little kid but was still aware that nearly all other adults looked down on the family because she was divorced. Never mind that in some of the marriages women were getting seven bells knocked out of them, they were married.

My mother was a single mother before I started school, so I know how terrible she was treated. Even simple things like finding a landlord who rent you a room was very tough.

noeffingidea Don't agree re the degree. My DD did this degree and is in Marketing, highly paid.

Tatty we had to rent a TV! (I'm not in my eighties, I promise!) but we couldn't afford to buy one, so had to rent one.

SciFi, I couldn't agree more re the I see, I want, I buy.

The OP could have switched jobs, taken on a second one, delayed having children until a house deposit was saved if it meant that much to them. Whereas in reality they went ahead with the wants, chose to work little blaming childcare costs and then moan when they can't afford something.

Although iirc in another post they were moaning that their friends and family had more free time than them and should have been using it to help clean her house or provide childcare so I'm sensing a theme.

Thing is, having a secure and stable place to live (which doesn’t necessarily mean getting on the housing ladder) is a basic need.

And meeting that particular basic need is much, much harder for millennials, particularly in the South East (where there is the largest concentration of well-paid jobs, which is a different issue). I’m not a millennial, so have no personal axe to grind, but...

There are virtually no council houses in many areas.

There is virtually no security of tenure in private rented accommodation. And the ability to get higher LTV mortgages distorted the property market and concentrated property wealth disproportionately in the older generations, as they were the ones who had the money to put down multiple deposits.

Both rent and property prices have increased - yet salaries haven’t. As an example, I rented a 1-bed flat in the early 2000s for £550/month. I was earning £19,000 a year. Today, the same flat rents for £825/month, and bills have also increased. The equivalent job now pays £18,000 a year.

Yes, in many ways the standard of living generally is much higher now than in the past. Still doesn’t take away from the difficulty in getting this basic need met.

As long as the rich oldies are demanding freebies, reduced tax rates etc then the hatred will only continue.

Thank you @GardenGeek, your response has been a relief in a thread of generally unhelpful responses.
The difference is that we listen to the generation before and acknowledge what they went through. When my mum tells me that she was blanked by friends on the street when she had a baby out of wedlock or when my stepdad tells me that the 11 plus exam basically set him up for factory work for life I listen and say 'that must have been hard for you.' I don't feel like I get that same level of empathy from the older generation.
Far from blaming them, I admire people born before the 90's for leading the way for gay rights, trans rights, diversity and equality. Yet I am constantly surprised by their reaction to topics such as this.
Four of my friends from school have committed suicide. I don't know about statistics but that seems high for one generation who have everything so easy.

"To wonder why the older generation can't admit that things are harder for millennials?"

Because it isn't harder per se. The struggles are different but they aren't harder.

And the Millenials I feel sorry for are those living in sub standard rented accommodation that is often illegal. Not those who are better off but can't buy a house.

I do think many Millenials have no idea how hard it used to be for some groups of people. Lots of things that were standard but were awful.

crunchy isn't it gobsmacking to think that bias and judgement like that existed?

Roussette Blimey yes, I'd forgotten about that! I had to rent one in the late 80s when I first left home. We rented a VCR too, so thought we were lucky!! Had nothing to watch on it, mind...

And Op, we had 3 TV channels too!! Now do you feel hard done by?!

OP you have had some horrible responses on here.

I think you are right. Years ago, you needed to save up and work hard etc. but it was possible to get a mortgage at say 3x your salary and you didn't necessarily need two incomes. Not at all saying it was easy, but it was possible.

The problem now is, as everyone knows, the gap between earnings and property prices is absolutely vast. You either mortgage yourself up to the hilt (if that's even possible) or rent.

It's not just about owning a property, it's knowing where you will be living from one year to the next and being able to plan into the future.

So I do sympathise with you.

Yes in certain parts of the south getting stable accommodation is difficult. I do sympathise with that and think tenants rights should be strengthened.
That is not the same as being able to buy a house though.

Thank you @GardenGeek, your response has been a relief in a thread of generally unhelpful responses

Ahhhhh, it's one of those AIBUs is it..... insult everyone who doesn't agree with you and focus on the one person who does

Although I admit I struggle to think of the 90s as a long time ago. I was thinking further back than that.

They are either deluded or they deep down do feel guilt that we will never have what they had so they have to try and allay that somehow by acting totally deluded.

I'm of the older generation and I absolutely agree that it's really hard to save for a (huge imo) deposit and then find enough income for the actual mortgage.

It was much easier in my day (70s/early 80s)

I think every generation struggles to understand the problems faced by other generations. Mike and the Mechanics were right.

It is difficult for older generations to understand the whinging of twenty-five year olds who go out every night, are never without new gadgets, endless new clothes and travel frequently.

It is equally difficult for a 25 year old to understand that 70 year olds really did grow up with one pair of shoes, ice inside the windows in winter, chilblains, bread for tea, no holidays ever, and God help you if you were disabled/gay/single mother etc.

I think we could all make more effort to look beyond our own situation instead of wallowing in self righteousness and feeling like the Most Opressed Generation Ever.

The responses aren’t unhelpful, but they are a different point of view. I do think the point about the type of degree is relevant too. Years ago, fewer people went to university because fewer expected to or had the opportunity. So most who did, went with an idea of a career in mind, rather than for the opportunity to study in great depth, a subject that they were interested in.

Tatty the company was called Radio Rentals

Could a millenial even contemplate having to rent and pay weekly for a pretty crap telly? Nope.