Welcome to the People's Republic of Mumsnet

[GlitterUnicornsAndAllThatJazz]

Hello everyone.
Welcome to the People's Republic of Mumsnet. The republic is currently without a government, so we'll need to start getting organised.

I invite you to put yourself forward for any given position, taking care to elaborate on why you consider yourself suitable for the role.

I've currently appointed myself as Republic Designer, a temporary role that expires as soon as a President is elected.

Positions we will need to fill:
President
Vice President
Minister of Culture
Minister of External Affairs
Minister of Women
Minister of Snacks

Feel free to make your case for a role, propose new roles, and explore what other things we may need to put in place to become a well respected republic with international clout.

[GlitterUnicornsAndAllThatJazz]

@iklboo
Sure. Please determine whether @TheVermiciousKnid was sacked or resigned, file a judgment with @Gilead and then have it approved by @TheNoseyProject

Tx.

[Littledrummergirl]

I'll put myself forward as minister for sales. I can unleash an army of children to use their pester power to sell anything. I guarantee our net sales will go through the roof as people will buy anything just to get away.

[GlitterUnicornsAndAllThatJazz]

@TheNoseyProject
I am awaiting confirmation from a candidate...

[GlitterUnicornsAndAllThatJazz]

@Littledrummergirl
Great. We currently need to sell the role of president.

I would like to become responsible for the Good Ideas Bureau once I am released from my duties as Republic designer.

[TheNoseyProject]

The president will need a deputy glitter and you have done, if I may say, a splendid job so maybe you could put yourself forward?

[GlitterUnicornsAndAllThatJazz]

@TheNoseyProject
Please see above.

I must admit that over the course of this experience I have become an ardent admirer of both your snort-inducing wit and conviction.

Should the opportunity to form an insurgenr coalition arise, I would be much obliged....

Warmest regards to Basil.

[Andrewofgg]

Minister for Billionaires. With a salary which will allow me to mingle with them on equal terms. For life.

[HanarCantWearSweaters]

In that case Madam President, I can offer you this fine example of our army for your perusal.

If satisfied we can negotiate the terms for a mighty force that shall render your enemies weak in the knees. They shall fill their shoes with urine at the sight. What are they going to do, fight back with heir own lions? They haven’t got any.

Because I have them.

(His name is Fernando)

[GlitterUnicornsAndAllThatJazz]

@Andrewofgg
I very much hope I am not being un-PC here, but based on your username, are you....are you....a MAN? Because if so you will need to be hot and provide cunnilingus if you hope to occupy a position here.

[blueskyinmarch]

Do we have a minister for Scotland? Can I put myself forward for this? We need to protect our interests on MN. Irn bru and Tunnocks tea cakes for all.

[GlitterUnicornsAndAllThatJazz]

@HanarCantWearSweaters
You are so incredibly skilled as an entrepeneur amd wordsmith. I respect you profoundly.

[AlpacaLypse]

@FuzzyCustard (and indeed everyone else concerned about the Cat and Dog imbalance) I do think one of the spaniels may be self identifying as a cat. She's certainly spending lots of time licking her arse in public, has vomited furballs at least twice, and adores cat food.

[Andrewofgg]

Glitter Yes I am and no sacrifice is too great if it serves the Republic!

[lostmyfeckingkeysagain]

I would like to put myself forward for the role of Minister for Cliché. I will assume responsibility for ensuring the preservation (through endless repetition) of long overused but nevertheless beloved phrases that form the fabric of this great Republic. This will include but is by no means limited to

"Did you mean to be so rude?"
"entitled"
"LTB"
"It's an invitation not a summons"
"Give your head a wobble"
"Over- invested"
"Have you logged it with 101?"

[raffle]

I won’t be backing TNProject as POTROM until I’ve seen her hair. If it’s not presidential enough I’ll be throwing my weigh behind the opponent

(When someone volunteers to oppose)

And some take that gavel off Gilead, she’s gavel happy, it’s gawn to ‘er ‘ed

[GlitterUnicornsAndAllThatJazz]

@Andrewofgg
Do you have children or do you plan on having any in the immediate future?
I think Minister of Billionaires is a little ambitious of you for the time being. We'll start you off as Minister of Stationery and see how you get on.
/pinches Andrew on the arse playfully/

[Littledrummergirl]

The president will have first dibs on all goodies provided by the minister's of kittens, puppies and cake.

[HanarCantWearSweaters]

Keep that up Glitter and you’ll find yourself heading towards your own personal state lion. Perhaps even two. Everyone knows they do better symmetrically.

[NeganLovesLucille]

I've always fancied being the head of my own religion - so can I run the state religious organisation. I thought if L Ron Hubbard could just start a religion, then why can't I?

It will be called Neganism an you will all have to pay me loads of money to progress through the different ranks of Neganism.

[GlitterUnicornsAndAllThatJazz]

@NeganLovesLucille
Great! I was just thinking the other day i needed some kind of readymade solution to lifes big questions.

Is this pantheistic or....? What are the "rules"?

[daysofpearlyspencer]

Can I oversee Ministry for Gussets please?

[Rufustherenegadereindeer1]

Hands ivebeenaroundtheblock a

Sausage?

[Snowysky20009]

Can I be Miniater for Learningand Development, if not already taken!! If it is, then deputy for it??

[NeganLovesLucille]

The rules are that I am the one and only person that knows the secrets of the universe and the only way that they will be revealed to you is when you have passed through certain levels of awareness. (Of course, each level costs a fair amount for you to pass through, but what value has money when compared to the ultimate knowledge of the secrets of the universe?)

Oh and it's a monotheistic religion.

[blueskyinmarch]

Ok. You are ignoring me so I am planning a coup. Enough of the English-centric ness!