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AIBU?

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Original poster

To not support friends new business venture

216 replies

melclaire1111 · 05/02/2018 06:17

Not sure if I'm being a bit unfair or if i should stick with my current stance!

I Have a friend, let's call her B. We have been friends for many years after meeting through mutual school friends and have been through many milestones together (broken relationships, engagements, weddings, buying houses etc)

That's about where the similarity ends tho. B went to uni and came out with a very well paid job which she progressed further into (financial controller type role) I didn't go to uni but instead work in a more administrative role at team leader level, any more responsibility does not appeal to me and am perfectly happy.

We both had DC's within 6 month of each other. B didn't return to work. She was made redundant while on maternity leave and was fortunate enough to be able to stay at home with DC. I went bavk full time after 8 months as financially we needed the money and I wanted DC to go to a nursery setting which they do full time and are absolutely thriving there. B and i have argued about this in the past as she has called me an absent parent for doing this and did once say what was the point in having children if all I did was send them to childcare but we have agreed to have difference of opinions on this!

Anyway b has recently started selling products to a well know MLM company, and is flooding her Facebook with posts about how great the products are and trying to get everyone to buy them. The products don't really appeal to me but I have put a few 'likes on her posts to support her.

Today however I received a message asking if i wanted to buy anything as she was putting an order in today. I politely said no as we don't have much money spare (attempting to move house so all spare money is going towards that as the potential new house needs some work) she then replied saying I was the only one of her friends who hadn't brought anything, she was hurt that I'm not supporting her and if it was me she would be buying everything she could. I told her that I think shes doing really well but the products aren't for my liking (she sells make up, I barely wear a coat of mascara when I go out, for work I wear no make up!) And that I didn't have the money to spend on stuff I don't need!

She then carried in saying that I could order the cheapest item they do (£35) and that would make her happy! I politely declined again and received a massive rant how I was an awful friend and she has now blocked me on everything!

I don't feel I'm being unreasonable but Wasn't expecting her reaction I guess.

OP posts:
Viviennemary · 06/02/2018 19:14

She needs to join the cf clulb. You are not there to support her new business. Sorry I am simply not in the position to buy anything at the moment should be quite enough for her. Tell her to get a proper job like you have had to.

Lovingit81 · 06/02/2018 19:19

Sorry how old is she? 5? Get rid of her, she sounds like a class A twat!

manicmij · 06/02/2018 19:24

If she is a friend surely she will appreciate your financial situation and should not be expecting you to buy anything. To me she should be giving you some free samples! Just let her fester in her selfishness, YANBU

Ellyess · 06/02/2018 19:25

You are better off without her! Sorry you have lost a friend, but she's shown what she is really like - a totally evil selfish brat. Let everyone know what she said to you - all the people she'll want to sell things to. And £35 is the cheapest???? That's theft. As the quote from "Airplane" goes; "What a Pisser!"

Bambamber · 06/02/2018 19:26

Good riddance to her, horrible cow

bretonknickers · 06/02/2018 19:30

I just find it annoying these sellers say they have their own business, no you don’t and it’s insulting to people who have actually gone through the struggle of setting up their own

and

remind her that it isn’t a business venture and that she’s being used a zero pay sales rep

She's being taken for a ride and has lost a friend over it. Soon she'll realise the truth and hopefully feel guilty.

I owned a business (nothing MLM or any of those kind) and I would never have dreamt of forcing my friends and family to buy my stuff. if they did, that's great, discount and a thank you for them. if they didn't, it wasn't the end of the world and I certainly wouldn't have held it against them!

billybagpuss · 06/02/2018 19:40

Unbelievable behaviour! I think the FB rant is classic, actually quite funny.

She clearly has absolutely no idea how running a business works.

AHungryMum · 06/02/2018 19:52

Incidentally the MLM obsessive I know, despite routinely spouting the usual shite about it changing her life, allowing her to work from home/choose her own hours/make great money whilst not having to compromise on how much time she gets to spend with her kids etc, was also recently extolling the virtues on Facebook of something called "the snowball method" for clearing your debts and in the comments section of her status update about that, she acknowledged use of credit cards on 0% finance. So her seemingly lavish lifestyle (nice new Audi car, designer handbags etc) presumably is not to do with her "bossbabe" MLM success, but everything is just on credit, as a smokescreen to APPEAR affluent and successful to draw in more gullible reps looking to emulate her "success" so she can get commission from their meagre sales...knowing that most of them will make a loss from their involvement with the MLM.

It truly is a parasitic industry. :(

Greensmurf1 · 06/02/2018 19:53

The mom-trepreneur craze has also hit my Facebook circle and it makes me really uncomfortable too. I don’t want to feel pressured into buying stuff I don’t need or like or marketed to by friends in Facebook. I know a lot of women feel empowered by having home based sales businesses but a lot of those companies are little better than pyramid schemes that trap women into unreachable sales targets with unsellable stock.
Can you tell these friends (in the nicest possible way) that their products aren’t something you are into and anyway you’d rather be a friend than a customer. Maybe it’s enough of a gesture to show you can spare the cash to take her out for a cuppa or drink, but not to splash out on stuff you don’t want for yourself or as a gift for anyone else.

Dagnabit · 06/02/2018 20:01

She has clearly been brainwashed by this cult. Some people, ime, seem to be vulnerable to these leeches of society, unfortunately. I have a cousin, who I barely know due to complicated family dynamics but a few years back, she messaged me - started with the hi, how are you crap then tried to recruit me as her downline. I said no because I'm a born sceptic but I had no idea about MLMs back then. She peddled Forever Living for ages but now as that was sooo successful, she's moved onto another MLM Hmm

By blocking you, the ball's in her court as to when and if she comes back with her proverbial tail between her legs, begging for your friendship. Up to you if you forgive her!

Wawawaa · 06/02/2018 20:02

I had a friend who constantly tried to sell me Arbonne cosmetics every time we met for a coffee. She even once took out a laptop once and proceeded with a full on powerpoint presentation which was pretty awkward. I stopped responding to her in the end as I didn't have the money for £50 face creams and felt used. She quit her job to do this and constantly posts how inspirational her life choice is but she seems pretty sad and financially ruined to be honest. Im amazed anyone with any intelligence would fall for a scheme like this.

riceuten · 06/02/2018 20:18

Sadly, I have seen this way too often with MLM. Impossible targets, busted friendships, and usually very little money, unless you are high up the tree. One of the things I learnt from a book about Herbalife and Amway was that the bit money was not in the goods themselves, but the (cough) "inspirational" materials and meetings to get you to sell sell sell.

You are well out of it.

riceuten · 06/02/2018 20:24

I bet this is Younique or Forever Living

Earthlingshlaag · 06/02/2018 20:30

You're well rid.

FaveNumberIs2 · 06/02/2018 20:33

Block her back and walk away. You don’t need friends like that.

RedForFilth · 06/02/2018 20:45

I would have ended the friendship for the "absent parent" comment alone tbh. Who the fuck does she think she is?

Jojofjo44 · 06/02/2018 21:38

I feel sorry for you, but I wouldn't write her off just yet. MLM companies are notorious for sucking the vulnerable into buying an expensive new pack to start their 'business' off and the buyer finds themselves paying more and more money into it with no return.
She will probably be desperately trying to save face and her methods are awful but I've seen so many examples of this. She may well need you when she sees the light.

TimesNewRoman · 06/02/2018 21:41

There are lots of threads on here with ways to tell CF MLM folk to GTF. And your friend does sounds like she is being a CF.

Abbylee · 06/02/2018 22:20

Good riddance to bad rubbish.

WoollyMollyMonkey · 06/02/2018 22:22

Is Avon one of these schemes?

PoorYorick · 06/02/2018 22:27

No, Avon isn't pyramid selling. Plus the products are actually quite good.

nannykatherine · 06/02/2018 22:58

what is MLM

k2p2k2tog · 06/02/2018 22:59

Avon's a bit different - they are more about selling hte products that they are about recruiting other Avon reps. And their products aren't terribly expensive. But you do have to ask yourself why as a customer you'd faff about with an Avon lady and a catalogue when you could just go to their website and have it delivered.

Rollonweekend · 06/02/2018 23:01

I told her that I think shes doing really well but the products aren't for my liking (she sells make up, I barely wear a coat of mascara when I go out, for work I wear no make up!) And that I didn't have the money to spend on stuff I don't need!

This is all you need to say...

She’ll eventually come out the other end when she’s jaded by the whole thing and realises she isn’t going to be a millionaire.

AbandonedBin · 06/02/2018 23:05

Give her a year max on it. Hate mlm