Do the doctors and nurses really get that upset about being called names by distressed relatives though? It's a genuine question. It's in the job description. Quite literally. Or at least, it's in my job description. Dealing with angry and upset relatives in highly charged situations. If a relative calls me/you a murderer, they have revealed that they are grieving and have misunderstood the EOL process. Nothing has changed about me, morally or practically. I still know that I am providing gold standard care for my patient and relieving them off suffering as they go through an inevitable process that we have no control over, however advanced medicine has become.
Once you withdraw life support, only the reserves of the human body remain, and we cannot predict what they will do. All we can then do is pre-empt and respond to symptoms of pain and distress, so that the patient can be comfortable in their last hours, or even days.
Nobody likes to be insulted, attacked, or punished for doing their job. But their job is to care for the patient, and by extension, their family. Dying didn't make anyone automatically a nice person, and it doesn't make your relatives nice, sensible, wise, rational, or able to process complex information. That doesn't mean we can choose not to deal with those people and cry in the corner.