AIBU - to let my children practice the piano

[Beanmummy]

We live in a 1930's semi detached house. We have a piano and the DC have piano lessons and are grade 4 and 2. They practice for about 40 minutes tops a day and may be a bit more at the weekends.

The piano used to be out in the back room of the house, well away from our neighbour, but due to being next to 3 outside walls the piano was going out of tune and falling to bits and we were told it should be in a room with a more constant temperature.

So we have moved the piano into the front room.

I have just seen the neighbour and explained to him that we had moved the piano. He is not a happy bunny at the best of times, and started to compliant that he could hear the piano from his bedroom, when we had it in our back room (his bedroom was the furthest point away that it could be). Now he says it's like having the piano in the same room! Which I do understand, but we are never playing at unreasonable times. My DC's don't wake early - so at weekends it does tend to be mid-day or afternoon and after school.

AIBU to him, or does this seem reasonable, it's not as if they are just bashing the piano!

Practise within reasonable hours and he hasn't got a leg to stand on.

Electronic pianos are all very well but cost a small fortune.

Everyone who has talked about people 'practicing' the piano is being extremely unreasonable. Posters who have discussed 'piano practice', or children 'practising' the piano, might have a point.

Also.

Zombie thread.

Practice within reasonable hours with the Piano moved away from my bedroom 'bed' wall & I would be happier believe me.... How do you know it's a 'He' that you refer to?

Just get a small space heater which can be left on constantly and put the piano back.

Otherwise you stand the risk of some retaliation from your neighbour. I often need to rest during the day and would really struggle with piano practice, especially if it wasn't actual proper playing but stops and starts. It's not a matter of who is right, it is a matter of being considerate and if you can avoid upsetting your neighbour then it would be kind not to. Sometimes people are grumpy because they aren't well or have problems, not just because they can be.

So true! Some really excellent points there :)

My ex NDN had a piano and was an opera singer, she taught others singing accompanied by her playing the piano. The noise of her or others singing was very loud, however it was between 4-5pm so I said nothing,

Other NDN from years back used to come home from work and start up on his electric guitar at 11.30pm accompanied by singing. Mentioned to him one day how much better his playing was these days and that I knew all the words to Paint it Black as well. He gave me a hard stare and the noise stopped from that day on.

Drumming teenager opposite started a rock band in the garage at the bottom of the garden. Hideous noise day and night. Council got it stopped after several complaints.

I learned the recorder, guitar and flute as a child. Sure I annoyed many. Have two guitars, a flute and a ukulele in the roof. Feel the urge to start playing them again reading this.

My brother used to play the bagpipes very badly when we were kids (no, we're not even Scottish)! He used to get up at 05:30 several times a weeks to practice for an hour . In fairness, we lived in a detached house in a different country where our neighbours weren't very nearby...

So a piano, in comparison, would be marvelous! Realisticaly, however, I would hate to have that next door to me - I'm glad I live in a detached house...

I hope you (YoThePussy) do indeed start playing musical instruments again. You're welcome to practice at my place in fact! Lol

(Gumbo) Kriky, that's a brutal start to any day. 05:30, he's lucky to still be alive I'd say...

YANBU- no wonder classical musicians are made up almost exclusively of the upper classes. If you have to have a detached house to practice at a reasonable hour. You’ve been more than accommodating.

Pinky we used to have a banjo too but my Dad loaned it to someone who never returned it.

My DSis learned the violin. We called it the Vile Thing.

I was on this thread earlier with a different name. My NDN played the flute for 2 or 3 hours a day and my DD couldn't do her homework. I could do nothing. No TV/books with earplugs... nothing. It was SO loud.

LIFE WAS NOT WORTH LIVING.

He was totally obnoxious when I begged him to reason.

I took him to court... no more flute.

I went round last night, & expressed my displeasure to the Husband. I felt a bit bad about it afterwards as he was away & it was his Wife who was hosting the Sunday night party. But at least he agreed to only playing between the hours of 9-9. He said there was nowhere else to put the Piano. (I had an idea where I'd like to put it, but kept this to myself)

I feel this situation is only going to deteorate unfortunately. I was happy there before this family moved in...Students may have the odd thumping party, but make way better Neighbours than young families lol.

WendyCope I completely hear you, it's extremely difficult to do anything which needs concentration. Being awoken by it is insanely irritating. I won't reason with them anymore, I will just go & buy a powerful speaker....

There is nothing wrong with practicing piano. Especially if practice doesn't happen at any unreasonable time. Yes, I do appreciate that the neighbour may not like it but it is what it is. We used to live in an apartment block when we were kids and my sister was able to practice piano even then and nobody complained despite the fact that we had neighbours on either side of the apartment as well as above and below us.

For those, who are suggesting the OP buys a keyboard with the headset: a standard piano is not the same as a digital Yamaha style keyboard/piano. It may well seem the same to those, who don't play the piano, but I assure you it's not. Also, following this logic, we would next have suggestions that the OP moves house to please the neighbour!

She was already more than reasonable to inform the neighbour that the piano moved and her kids practice at reasonable times. I don't see what else could possibly be done here and I am afraid the neighbour will just need to try and get over this one.

My dd is home this afternoon and she will practice various (woodwind)and Piano for about 4 hours, she will do the same until Sunday evening when she goes back to school.
Our neighbour is lovely, but we don't take the piss. nothing before 9am and nothing after 8pm.
He does go away a lot though, but is in during the day and has never had a problem thank God.
During the school hols there is dd practising then dh also does about 4 hours.
Musicians don't always earn enough to buy a detached property.

@ tiggerkid I'd be interested to see how you deal with a clonking Piano sound coming through your bedroom wall (party wall) at all times of the day. Somehow I think your musical ethics would go out the window...These neighbours have a soundproofed music studio in the loft, but choose to use the downstairs Piano instead.

Pinky747

Yes, and DD is 10, so homework will become more and more important. I asked if we could agree on fixed hours? Not always 3 hours after school. He said no. After 3 years it had become a really big stress. I realised it was not going to change (I was also not the only one complaining... it was SO loud. Then sometimes a spot of opera singing)

He got aggressive, so as I said, I took him to court. It was that or move. I couldn't be arsed to move and why should I? I rented this property precisely as it was near school. I actually have a detached property I rent out, but don't want to live there and nor should I!

As my landlord said 'this is a residential property and not a music academy'

It was utterly unbearable.

The majority of kids play an instrument according to the ABRSM (tad biased perhaps), by age 16, only 3% never played one. Instrumental practice is such a normal childhood noise I would not worry unless you are proposing to practise the trumpet at 4am.

I agree, Paxillin I was next to a PROFESSIONAL musician and it was torture. It really was.

A child for 1/2 and hour is annoying but liveable if you know when it will end. But people should remember, these are not 'nice tunes' they are repetitive nerve inducing repeated exercises and phrases, over and over and over. You actually feel as if you are going mad. I started to hear the scales in my sleep

Nothing nice about it. When it affects your childrens academic work and your quality of life OVER theirs that's it as far as I am concerned.

It might not be unreasonable hours but it it incumbent upon you to mitigate as much disruption to your neighbours as possible. Just because it's at a reasonable time you are forcing your neighbour to listen to and accept your noise.

We lived next door to a piano player, decent hours or not it was horrendous to the point I got awful anxiety, we couldn't enjoy a family meal because they played at a reasonable hour which was dinner time, nor could we enjoy watching a film at the weekend due to their reasonable piano practice timing.

Invest in an electric piano with headphones, just because you feel it's ok doesn't mean your neighbours do or that they should have their daily routine disturbed by you.

You have had about 500 terrible renditions of "Fur Elise" I take it, @WendyCope ?

Queen summed it up better than me. I also got so anxious and NEVER enjoyed an evening meal. I was always on edge... when will it start? When will it end when it does start? My DD has a maths exam tomorrow etc etc

If someone was ill and needed a bit of peace?

Pax yep! And the broken chords! Over and over...

When I spoke with my Neighbour last night, he said there was nowhere else to put the Piano except against my bedroom wall (The party wall). We agreed a 9-9 curfue, but I still don't think this will work mid/long term, it's asking for trouble. Especially if I have a lie-in or an early night. It still feels like a loaded gun is awaiting unfortunately. @Wendycope made a good point 'this is a residential property and not a music academy'

Pinky747

There is a law where I live (Spain) of 'no noise after 8pm'. Bollocks to that, you would have to a) phone the police b) risk them taking an hour to arrive after the noise eventually stopped c)be counting down minutes and they always go just 15 minutes over (and they always, always do)... you are hopping and stressed now to the max. You will not enjoy the latest Nicola Walker ITV drama special at this point.

9pm is far, far too late IMO.

I would put something in writing. Against a party wall is totally unacceptable.

I sadly, also think it is asking for trouble. Believe me, I have lived this. Saturday morning? The very threat he will wake you means you will wake up.

I honestly started to drink a bottle of red wine most nights

I'd buy the speaker, I honestly would.