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Original poster

To ask what you've done in the past as a parent and now cringe about

323 replies

CherryChasingDotMuncher · 28/01/2018 22:58

We've just celebrated our son's first birthday, he's our 2nd baby. We had a lovely chocolate cake made for him and of course plated him up a little slice. DH reminded me of our PFB DD's first birthday. We did the same - had a chocolate cake made for her 'party' (parents and siblings came round) which we dished out to everyone, except DD. Then we produced a sugar free disgusting muffin for the birthday girl herself as we didn't want her having any chocolate until she was much older Blush what a pair of wankers. She's 4 now and today she had 3 Freddo's.

We also took her to the doctors when she was eight months old - because she shivered. It was January in northern England, and we'd just returned from living abroad, in the desert. Idiots

OP posts:
SugarPlumFerry · 29/01/2018 10:03

I still hate when PFB smells of other people's perfume. He is 4. He comes home smelling of MIL and Auntie and I know it means he's had lots of cuddles but I like him to smell like him and not rank sweet chemically florally smells Blush

tealandteal · 29/01/2018 10:46

Did this on Saturday and already cringing! DS is 6 months and refused to feed, bottle breast or baby porridge. At 8 hours I called 111 who advised to take him to walk in centre, seen by OOH GP who said to bring him back in the morning if still not feeding. After 12 hours he finally had a feed, then every 2 hours overnight. Essentially I took my baby to hospital because he was teething and cut two teeth that day. Who knows what the doctor thought!

Dinosaursdontgrowontrees · 29/01/2018 10:49

rockingaround boiling veg in Evian! Grin

stressedoutfred · 29/01/2018 10:56

@ZanyMobster - we leave a nightlight on for our puppy Grin

Not quite as bad as my parents who recently left their puppy in our care whilst they were away, in his suitcase ( I kid you not!) was a spreadsheet outlining when he is fed and has a wee and a poo.... ConfusedGrin

heron98 · 29/01/2018 11:10

My mum and I looked after my sister's PFB for a weekend over Christmas.

Sis left us pages and pages and pages of instructions. We were so hell bent on following them and checking the time etc, that we managed to face plant DNephew out of his buggy. Luckily he was unscathed.

We shook hands and agreed never to speak of it again.

sinceyouask · 29/01/2018 11:18

Tried to stick religiously to making ds1 sleep in his Moses basket. When he was about 6 weeks old and I gave in to co sleeping it improved all our lives 100%.
Took ds1 to the walk in centre when his cord fell off as I thought it looked sore. They were very kind but also asked me had I been sleeping OK. Of course I hadn't been sleeping OK, ds1 did not do sleep unless being held.
Bought only Clarks shoes (that i really couldn't afford) for ds1 for ages and ages, until one day someone told me that what mattered was that the shoes fit and were comfortable. It was a revelation. Ds3 has never had Clarks.
Threw a tantrum over ds1 bringing home a reading book about Noah's Ark because we were an atheist family and school was pushing religion on my pure, precious son. DH pointed out that I had bought ds1 a Noah's Ark toy a few years previously. Hmm.

Yokohamajojo · 29/01/2018 11:20

I recorded every breastfeeding and have sheets and sheets of it:

Left: 7 mins, 10:30
Right: 8 mins: 11:30
Right: 6 mins: 12.45

and so on! Why??

Faintlinesquints · 29/01/2018 11:23

I was a single mum up until dd1 was around 18 months and I met dh. I was a ridiculously over protective mum.
Dds first ever night away from me she was 4 (!) and Mil came to pick her up. Dd was sitting ready with her suitcase of belongings next to her. I remember mils face and telling me she was only staying for a night, not a week. She still teases me now!

MandaraSugar · 29/01/2018 11:28

Reading some of the above has been a huge help to me - BIL and SIL (DH's brother and wife) have really got on my nerves since they had kids (now 8 and 5). Invites to any events have to fit in with the kids schedule or none of them come, by 5pm they need to a bathed and getting into their PJs for bed - on weekends also. We didn't go through any of this with our DC so I genuinely thought they were batshit (to quote NotEnoughCushions!) hopefully it'll start to fade!

P.S. Laughing aloud at the sugar-free carrot cake story for the 1st birthday and everyone politely nodding!

ZanyMobster · 29/01/2018 11:43

@stressedoutfred Ha Ha, I just wasn't sure if they'd be ok in a new place in the dark and even though the internet said it was fine I felt as if my babies were too pre plus Grin they are 6 months now and I don't any more although I do say goodnight, love you to them every night Blush

Runningoutofusernames · 29/01/2018 12:11

To the pp wondering if chocolate cake for 1st birthday is the norm... I'm on my third now and personally still wouldn't give sugary cake for a 1st birthday party. The UK is so much worse than other places we've lived for giving junk food to kids (then wondering why kids here are so often fussy, overweight or both). In Scandinavia children's parties are all low-sugar and pretty dull, and same lots of other places... But that rant aside, did so many of these!

YY to the detailed instructions.
Also lived in a sunny place and DS1 was never allowed to be in direct sunlight for longer than about 30 seconds, like some kind of vampire baby, because they're not supposed to wear sunscreen until 1 and I was convinced his skin was extra sensitive and would burn 😳

Bake · 29/01/2018 12:33

Grin Vampire baby

Reading this is helping me to put things into perspective, but I still think I'll be leaving detailed instructions if I ever manage to leave PFB for a few hours.

Anotherdayanotherdollar · 29/01/2018 12:34

I always enjoy these PFB threads!
I can't think of anything to add, but perhaps dh or dmum would be better placed to answer! Grin

Bake · 29/01/2018 12:40

I had to leave the room recently while MIL held PFB, who was about 11 weeks old at the time. I messaged my OH and asked him to get MIL to stop pounding PFB on the back. It had been ages since she fed and she had already been winded. Even when I was in the next room I could hear her beating my baby's back! I realise I have heightened emotions at the moment so thought it best not to ask her to stop myself Angry

Eolian · 29/01/2018 12:48

I was a bit pfb with my first and did the whole giving long lists of instructions thing when I left her with my my parents.

However, I don't quite agree with the sugar thing. Pfb was kept away from sugar and chocolate for way longer than dc2, but it's pfb (now age 12) who has always had a massively sweet tooth, not dc2.

Cheekylittlenumber · 29/01/2018 12:55

I accidentally caught PFB's fingers in the fridge door when she was one. Her fingers were fine but she was crying of course. I then put my fingers in the fridge and slammed the door to see how much it hurt.

Whywonttheyletmeusemyusername · 29/01/2018 13:18

I did more or less the same with DC 1. DC4 dragged herself up Grin However, I now do it with Ddogs. ..and leave detailed instructions with DC whenever I go on holiday !!! Including leaving a light on for them Grin

Kenworthington · 29/01/2018 13:22

I still die a little inside when I think of this- ds1had his primary school meeting at our home before he started School meeting his new reception teacher etc and they mentioned School dinners and would he be having them. I said oh god no, he only eats organic. Christ. What a twat

bananamonkey · 29/01/2018 13:23

I did let DD have some chocolate cake on her birthday, she’d never had cake or chocolate until then and loved it, her face was a picture!

I also kept a log (well on an app) of feeds, nappies and sleeping, it was so useful as our sleep deprived brains couldn’t remember how long ago the last feed/nap was. We still use it now for sleep and she’s 16 months 🙈

I got upset one day around 6 months that I was a terrible parent as she didn’t have enough educational toys so went and spent £30 in the ELC on a wooden abacus and similar! I also cried after meeting up with friends around the same time because their babies all sat nicely and played with toys whereas mine couldn’t sit yet preferred rolling around on the playmat like a crazy little thing! 😂

BBQsAreSooooOverrated · 29/01/2018 13:35

When I had my first she was never allowed McDonald's. When the in-laws took her to the panto and gave her McDonald's I insisted she had a fruit bag instead of fries, NO fruitshoots and the chicken nuggets in her happy meal. This was until she was about 6!

NinaMarieP · 29/01/2018 14:06

I only have a dim light on if I'm cosleeping... that's not totally PFB is it? If he's in his snuzpod light goes out but when he's in bed with me I like to be able to see him, god knows why!

If I leave him with his grandparents (have been doing that since six weeks) my instructions are usually "he'll be hungry around x time, tired around x time, there's 4.5oz of milk, nappies, clothes and bibs are in the bag... call me if you need me."

They're the ones that made me bring the baby gym for the first time they had him... that looked very PFB when we arrived toting that.

UpstartCrow · 29/01/2018 14:10

We didn't even own a TV until DS1 was 2 years old. I think he learned to read as an act of self defense against Radio 4 Blush

Abracadabraapileofbollocks · 29/01/2018 14:15

My eldest dd used to come back from her grandma's in clean clothes. Anything my mil had washed I used to wash again in our stuff ...... no she doesn't seem affected by specific powders. I was worried if she wore clothes that didn't smell of "home" she'd be sad. Confused Blush

Abracadabraapileofbollocks · 29/01/2018 14:15

In my defence i was pregnant with dd2 at the time.

Theshipsong · 29/01/2018 14:19

Cheeky your fingers in the fridge episode made me howl with laughter. All other PFB stories pale in comparison.