Have you ever checked your partners phone?

[Elizanotlittle]

I have with my ex. Some of my friends say they have never looked snd don't even think about it. Others say they check now and then and don't feel bad.

I don't want to go down this road with new partner.

Yeah. He'd left it next to me while he took the dogs out. It had never ever crossed my mind before but totally randomly and out of boredom and sheer nosiness I decided to have a gander thinking it might provide some light entertainment (he's always smirking at messages from his mates). First message I read was a group one planning my surprise birthday party. That'll teach me

No, it would be a complete invasion of his privacy. I wouldn't open his mail & I wouldn't look at his phone. If I had any concerns I'd talk to him & I hope he'd do the same. He wouldn't dream of looking at my phone either. We could guess at each other's passcodes, I think we use the same one - it's sort of a family code. We've been together almost 30 years & we trust each other completely. If we didn't the relationship wouldn't be worth much. Trust is everything to me.

My DH has form though but tbh if they are a cheating bastard they would prob delete anything incriminating

No. I wouldn't ever do that.

If I found myself considering it, there would already be something badly wrong.

No absolutely not

My boyfriend now - no, and I never would. He has fingerprint access to my phone so he can use it if need be, and I can access his (for if one of us is driving or something). Trust is so important in a relationship though; neither of us would go through looking for something (there isn’t anything to find and we both know that!)

An ex, yes, because he had already been caught in a lie, then had been caught lying when I confronted him about the first lie. He was acting very protective of his phone, and I knew wouldn’t get straight answers, so I looked. And found exactly what I expected, unfortunately.

Yes, when I had suspicions. I was right and he is now EX 'D'P

He's given me the password, and it's always around, I could check anytime, but I never do.

No

Nope, we know each others codes but we would not dream of using each others devices without asking first.

No. I’ve never checked his phone. We both have the same passcode, so I could. But I have no reason to, nor any business snooping around in there.

I have used his phone (and his iPad) to google something or similar, but I’d never look at his messages or check his emails. Or even check his browser history.

Even if I was suspicious about an affair, I think I’d just ask him rather than trying to be some sort of spy.

Yes, my ex’s. One night I went out with him and some of his work pals. There was a woman there who I just got a weird feeling about - she wouldnt acknowledge me, wouldn’t look me in the eye and just felt like she was up to something. The next morning my ex DP was asleep, and I took his phone to see if there were any messages from her - there was one but then I could tell some had been deleted from the way the messages read. I convinced myself I was being paranoid, and just as I went to put his phone back loads of messages from her started pinging through - she loved him, she missed him and hated seeing him with me the night before, when can they be together?? Etc etc. Glad I checked it

No
And if I knew any partner of mine had checked my phone he'd be history.

My DH has form though but tbh if they are a cheating bastard they would prob delete anything incriminating

Not in my experience. This is how I found out my ex was seeing other women. Infact he invited one round to his house the day before he came round to mine.

No never have. Together 12 years.

I’d be really uncomfortable if DH were looking through my phone. It would be a real invasion of privacy. He is welcome to check google maps while I’m driving, or put music on from it in the car, etc though.

I don’t even like it if he goes into my drawers or bag (not snooping. It’s not that I’m hiding anything; I just like to have privacy. He seems less bothered by such things, but I apply my own standards and would never go into his drawers or his work bag (or his jacket pockets) without both permission and reason.

I am not sure I could ever trust anyone but thats my past and on me not my partner.

Once - to check his Amazon basket before a birthday! I think it's a bad sign for the relationship if you feel the need.

Yes. Had really bad PND and thought the worst of every situation.

It put my mind at rest.

I do all the time. not tocheck hes doing something wrong. He's extremely forgetful and I'm a control freak with family time and the like. I'm not sneaking I do it in front of him.

All the family know each other's codes. Hope that helps.

I checked my ex's phone when he was becoming secretive about it and spending a lot of time on it. This was about 15 years ago when phones were just calls and texts. I found he had lots of numbers saved under 'names' like withheld, no number, international, work. I knew before I checked it that once I'd done it our relationship was over because either way the trust had gone. What I found made it easier to end it.

I've checked my husband's phone and I've never wanted to or had reason to. If it ever became an issue then I'd consider things over before I did it.

Yes! Years ago I felt really insecure about our relationship (more to do with my issues than the relationship). One day we went to the cinema so I asked for his phone to use the Orange Wednesday code. On the way back from picking up the tickets I thought I'd look through his phone, forgetting that there was a long mirror where he managed to see everything . He had a good laugh about it and I did after I'd finished feeling horrible. He would often leave his phone our for me to check but I can honestly say that I haven't in nearly a decade.

Not sure I’d call it checking but we often look at each other’s phones to check dates, commitments, phone numbers etc.

No

I have no idea how to get into his phone - he has tried multiple times to show me...but I have no reason to. He knows all of my passwords, but only uses my phone to download pictures.

Yeah, my ExH’s because I had a suspicion. Turned out to be right.

Though despite me having seen obvious evidence he’d been fucking someone else it turned into me being the ‘bad guy’ for invading his privacy, he denied doing anything wrong and blamed it on me for being a shitty wife! Took me five months to work up the courage to leave.

I’ve never felt the need to check DP’s phone, completely different relationship!