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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be terrified I might have cancer?

328 replies

Happyland88 · 27/01/2018 07:54

I have 2 Breast lumps in the same area of my breast. I’m 29 years old (was 28 when I found both lumps.

The doctor examined and said she wasn’t concerned (didn’t feel like cancer to her). This was about 6 months ago and I’ve found it hard not to worry even though I was given some reassurance.

One of the lumps feels like it may have got bigger and now I’m terrified.

If I didn’t have my two girls (aged 1 & 4), I wouldn’t want to get out of bed. I’m too scared to make a dr’s appointment. I don’t want this to be cancer. I’ve read that cancer in young women is very aggressive. I want to be around to see my children grow old.

I’m on my own as my husband works away, I’m just so so scared.

OP posts:
BuzzKillington · 27/01/2018 08:47

Go back to the GP.

No one on here is going to tell you to wait.

GreatDuckCookery6211 · 27/01/2018 08:49

Don't be ridiculous Polly. People are allowed to share their experience on here. If anything it might make the OP wake up and get herself seen.

yummycake123 · 27/01/2018 08:50

How old are your kids OP?
If you don't have anyone to help you look after them, maybe hire a babysitter for half a day? Are they at school?
You have to have those lumps checked. The more you wait, the more anxious you will be; you need to get a referral to the breast clinic and go, you have to make it happen.
It might be nothing but if it's something serious, a year has already gone by and time is crucial... I wouldn't want to wait any longer.

yummycake123 · 27/01/2018 08:52

Just saw your kids' age is in your OP, sorry.

scaryteacher · 27/01/2018 08:52

Stop making excuses and go back to the GP. It's no good bleating that you want to be around for your dc if you won't do anything, like go back to the doctor, to make that happen. Lots of women cope with things on their own because their husbands are away, you have to get a grip and get on with it....and yes, mine was normally somewhere under the ocean and couldn't bee contacted. It is hard, but you have to deal with it.

Original poster
Happyland88 · 27/01/2018 08:53

I know you are all right and I’m struggling to keep my composure in front of my two DC, I’ve been in denial for the past couple of months but today it has really hit me; the seriousness of it.

I wish I was brave, I’ve never been brave. I’m scared of so many things but I’m finding this particularly awful.

callaird that is really kind, I’m in Wiltshire.

OP posts:
MyPreciousWaja · 27/01/2018 08:53

You poor thing, you've got yourself into a real state about this and you're clearly very, very scared. So take a moment to breathe and try to be rational.

Ok, so you've spoken to your doctor and been examined. The doctor isn't worried so take some reassurance from that. However, as many other posters have pointed out, you need a referral to the breast clinic to be sure about this.

You need to go back to the gp and tell her that you are still very worried, you think the lump has grown and you need a referral to be checked. Where is your husband? Have you spoken to him about it? I really wouldn't wait another few weeks op. Even though these lumps are probably benign, you're clearly very anxious and a few weeks will feel like forever if you are scared. Get the ball rolling, speak to your gp again.

Sending Flowers and a hand hold.

lastnamefirstfirstnamelast · 27/01/2018 08:54

Get an appointment to see a different GP asap. I dont know what you want from this thread other than reassurance but we would be wrong to say its all ok and its probay nothing. That might be what you want to hear but please please get a 2nd opinion from another gp and asked for a scan to be sure. You can do this.

meandmytinfoilhat · 27/01/2018 08:56

Go back to your GP. A friend recently found a lump in her breast. The GP sent her away but she had to go back 3 times before she got a scan.

Her lump was a cyst, she had it drained. It's more than likely a cyst OP so please don't panic but do go back to your GP.

Original poster
Happyland88 · 27/01/2018 08:56

My husband knew when I found the lumps and when I was examined and that the doctor said it was nothing. I can’t tell him about this just now as he’s competing in an event for the next 2 weeks, he’s worked very hard for years for this and it’s his last shot at it. I don’t want to say anything to him until the event is over. The downside is that I have no one to confide in.

OP posts:
TonySopranosVest · 27/01/2018 08:57

Breast cancer survivor here. I was diagnosed via a private mammogram and underwent a mastectomy and reconstruction.

It wasn’t that bad! Cancer is definitely not the worst thing to have ever happened to me by a long shot. I was caught early though and had no lumps or changes. 90 percent of lumps in the breast are nothing to worry about.

Cancer isn’t a death sentence any more but the sooner they find it, the sooner they can get on with it. If you leave it (and it IS cancery - unlikely TBH) then you are increasing the risk of the sod getting to your lymph nodes and having a good jaunt around the body.

Just go back to your, frankly, shit GP.

If this is all true.

Halebeke425 · 27/01/2018 08:58

Even if it costs £100, it'd be worth it to find out one way or another. What if you wait weeks and then it is the worst but it's too late to do anything?! You'd wish you got in that taxi then wouldn't you? Have you got savings, a credit card, someone you can borrow from? Phone your husband and tell him the situation, ask him to send you the money? It can be paid back in time but you can't get your health back that easily. I know it's scary, you can do this Flowers

Flappyears · 27/01/2018 08:59

Lots of us are scared OP about lots of things. But really the only way of relieving the fear is to get it sorted out. The only way of doing that is to go the gp. Anything else is just avoidance and will make you feel worse in the long term.

NormaNameChange · 27/01/2018 09:02

I had a breast lump aged 23. It was 10 days between seeing my GP and waking up on oncology ward after having it removed. My GP referred me and the breast clinic didnt even do a biopsy as the consultant was convinced from the scans it was cancer. It wasn't. It was a very large collection of small cysts. I was lucky - I'd waited 3 months to go to the GP. Please dont wait.

MrTrebus · 27/01/2018 09:02

OP so you have absolutely no friends or family nearby, not 1 person that would drive you to the doctor (not the hospital because you wouldn't go there til you had a referral anyway) and watch your kids for 20 or 30 minutes whilst you were in there?? Really honestly not one single person?? Come on OP. Unfortunately you wont get a massive amount of sympathy if you're not willing to help yourself.

zen1 · 27/01/2018 09:03

At the very least you could ring your GP and talk to her over the phone. Tell her you think the lump has grown and you want a referral to the breast clinic. She may want to see you again or she may just refer you. Either way, if you get fobbed off, see someone else.

Llanali · 27/01/2018 09:04

Come ON OP.

Seriously. You’ve had kids. That’s scary; you are not that wet clearly.

As LadyMacbeth would say, screw your courage to it’s sticking place.

What do you want from this thread? You’ve just made excuses- do you appreciate how ridiculous that will be, if god forbid and unlikely, this is cancer?

“No darling, Mummy didn’t want to go across town to the hospital taking you two with her as it was a long way, so she didn’t get seen by the doctor”.

I’m currently in the middle of my two
Week urgent referral for cancer suspected.
My appointment is Monday. I’m frightened too, but I’m an adult capable of putting mind over matter. And so are you.

DavidBowiesNumber1 · 27/01/2018 09:06

PollyPerky thanks for your good wishes Flowers but I really wasn't trying to make the OP panic (I chose my words very carefully), I was just illustrating that waiting is not the best course of action.
And I was 29 when I had my first cancer scare. Luckily it was only a scare

youngnomore · 27/01/2018 09:08

OP. If you can’t do anything right now. THen there really isn’t much else you can do for the moment. How about you call the doctor for a telephone consultation and say you’re very worried that it’s grown in size but have no way of getting to them for a couple of weeks. Maybe the doctor can do a referral without you actually having to go and see her.

mrsrhodgilbert · 27/01/2018 09:08

Another one here with breast cancer. I'm shocked that your dr hasn't sent you to the breast clinic. She can't possibly tell by having a feel. I know what you're thinking I've been there but it isn't always as you imagine. My treatment has been simple, small operation, radiotherapy and a tablet to take for five years. It's very doable and outcomes often so much better than you think. You have no choice.

SusanBunch · 27/01/2018 09:10

Yes, go to the doctor. With your kids in tow if necessary. Get public transport if you can't afford to get a taxi there.

You can 100% get breast cancer at 29. Someone I was at school with did and there are countless cases that I have read about of women under 40 getting breast cancer. Statistically you probably don't have it but you need to get it checked and even a few weeks will make a difference if it is cancer.

supersop60 · 27/01/2018 09:11

OP, for the sake of your children, PLEASE don't wait. If you ask, there will be people to help.
happy to drive to wherever you are, myself.

ToothyMcPuthy · 27/01/2018 09:11

Make an appointment to see your GP on Monday OP and ask to be referred to your local breast clinic.

You will be seen within 2 weeks, by which time DH will be back/you'll have had time to arrange lifts/arrange childcare.

Please don't wait any longer. Remember most breast lumps are not cancer, especially in someone your age, but ultimately breast cancer doesn't discriminate

You need to do this OP Flowers

Nquartz · 27/01/2018 09:13

I found a lump, gp referred me to the breast clinic, think my appointment was about 3 weeks later. He didn't think it was anything to worry about but still referred.
Turned out to be a milk filled cyst left over from breastfeeding.
Please book another doc appointment

thesunwillout · 27/01/2018 09:13

Does your surgery have a hospital car service, ring and ask as they can prob arrange free if not v cheap lift.