To not want the bloody fish and chips?!

[KaosReigns]

Today Mil and Fil took our DD out for "an hour" so that DP and I could get some cleaning done. Very generous of them and I am grateful. So at 5 they pick her up to go swimming (summer here and hot as hell), we get to work.

An hour and a half later DP calls them asking where they are and they say they're on the way back, the pool is a 10 minute walk away. So I get started on dinner.

45 minutes later they arrive, with fish and chips. Both pil and us agree that the fish and chip shop around the corner from us serves the worst fish and chips in the city. But on the way back they decided to take a detour, and pick us up a scoop of chips, one fish, and a sausage.

AIBU to not be feeling particularly grateful? I thanked them at the time and said "I wish you'd mentioned, I have dinner in the oven", they said well youre having fish and chips now. DH thinks that even mentioning that I was cooking was ungrateful.

So WIBU, DH says don't look a gift horse in the mouth, I say don't show up at someone's house with a fucking horse and no warning. Am i being a horrible dil?

I might be a little irritated if they didn't say but I would carry on cooking dinner and save it for tomorrow whilst relishing the chips etc

YWNU. When they called they should've said 'We were thinking we might stop and get some fish and chips on the way, would you like that?'. To not do so and turn up with (disgusting, greasy), fish and chips is rude IMO.

I think this kind of thing depends heavily on the pre-existing relationship and the general intentions of the junk-bearing relatives. If my dad did this I wouldn't be remotely offended and would just save dinner for the next day and enjoy the chips. My dad is sweet and a bit eccentric and would do anything for anyone, it wouldn't cross his mind that it might not be a good idea. He can't go out to post a letter without coming back laden with odd fruit or a leg of lamb or god knows what, to "contribute". And I would just roll my eyes inwardly and accept, because it comes from a good place and I love the old bugger and his generosity.

If my mother and stepfather did it, I would know it was a control thing. They weren't generous, kind people, they were vicious narcissistic bastards who didn't give a crap about us and took every opportunity to undermine and appropriate as many areas of our lives as possible. Not the same deal.

We do get chocolate sometimes to be fair, only ever chilli or mint flavour (which she knows I don't like but DH does)......She hasn't brought round expired stuff in ages at least, not since DH got sick that time.

Hmmmmm. Is there an element of "shes so mean to him, always making him eat "healthy", if it wasnt for me, HIS MUM, hed just be miserable all the time eating twigs"?
Maybe Im being unfair, but this has the feel about it of a grandchild being fed sweets by granny because she secretly wants to be their favourite person.

They are the opposite to my in-laws.

Whenever they have the DCs for anytime in the evening (probably once every 3 weeks for a hour when I have to nip back out to work at tea time) they bring or go out to collect a chippy without including the DCs!

It annoys the life out of me as poor DCs have to sit there having eating something else (which they will not have enjoyed as much) whilst other people eat chips!

I have asked them so many times to let me know if they are having a take away at mine so I can leave them some money to include the DCs but no!!! It gives me the rage!

How come your husband ate out of date food?

Did he not realise or didn't he dare not eat it?

Also the ham-how did they get into your house?

If you have told them that you don't want/like it & they insist-throw it away in front of them!

out of date food isn't necessarily inedible. it means the 'best before date' has passed. Plenty of foods are still fine after this date.

True, so yes he could eat it or not as he decided.

Sounds awful to me though-as though they can't chuck stuff out so essentially pass on rubbish so that others do it for them!

chocolate the food made him sick so it was out of date inedible. She said out of date not best before or anything else. It shouldn't have been eaten, the mother knew that as she didn't want to be sick, but didn't want to waste it so gave it to her own child. That's not even remotely sane.

It does make sense worraliberty. the OP states the amount of food brought to the house from the chip shop was enough for the family to eat and wonders if the PILs are trying to fatten her family up. In my opinion that amount of food isn't enough for a family to eat. My point was that if the OP routinely serves small amounts of food to visitors it may have been that the PIL's brought the chip shop meal into the house to supplement the portions of food provided by the OP.

Oh, you took the post seriously falang? I think it's perfectly clear the OP was joking, so that's why it didn't make sense.

"I can only assume it's part of some massive evil plot to fatten us all up. Maybe theyre trying to kill us off with junk food so they get dd."

Yanbu.
Next time, put the food she has brought straight into the bin if she won't take it back. Ignore any tears and tantrums. If they are sneaking ham into your fridge while you are out, they KNOW what they are doing is wrong.

My mum is obsessed with food and feeding kids too, I was really overweight as a child. She babysat for me, texted my kids were hungry at 5pm. I replied they could have snacks and I would cook for them when I got home so they could eat at 6.
She texted me at half five 'Your kids are dying of hunger.'
A bit overdramatic you might think, but also monstrously tactless - I was at a funeral.

Oh. No I didn't think it was part of an evil plot but it did seem that the OP thinks that tiny amount of food is enough to feed a family so perhaps she does think the PILs don't think they eat enough. You'll never know.

Re Portion size they vary so much from place to place, so who's to know how large or small the portions from that particular fish and chip shop are? Even if tiny in size the point is moot (spelling?) as the food was actually bought by PIL and thus deemed sufficient by them.

Seriously guys I was joking about the murder plot and fattening up, if I really thought that then I'd have far bigger problems than some unwanted fried food. Fairly sure im not starving my family either.