32 weeks pregnant and don't want sex

[boomboomboom6]

DP is harassing me. I don't want to be touched, I'm grumpy, my hips hurt, my lady bits are sore. He says that I should be able to go all the way up to birth and should be able to have sex.

AIBU?

@GlitterUnicornsAndAllThatJazz 😂😂👋

Grim grim grim

We barely had sex when i was pregnant, because I sad SPD, I was working full time and I was fucking exhausted. Breastfeeding kills my libido and it’s onyl just returning now, baby is nearly 1.

My husband hasn’t said anything other than to reassure me, because he’s not a ducking rapist.

OP, is this the first time he’s tried to pressure you in to sex? I would be really worried about this behaviour. I definitely wouldn’t be laughing it off.

Hmm. Pregnancy - constant nausea, horrific SPD that meant I couldn't walk or even move in bed (or even lie in a bed from 30 weeks).

And when my twins were born.... c section, pumping, hormones fucked, utter exhaustion you can't even comprehend.

Didn't have sex until 10 months pp. Your DH is a) a complete twat and b) in for a real shock when the baby arrives!

absolute twat. YANBU. Some women still want to have sex at that stage.... not many tho. I only did it because I went overdue and wanted to bring on labour... it was pretty awful lol. Its not just your size but the tiredness, the sickness, the stress. Its not conducive to being in the mood for sex for many women.

I'm taking it this was meant to be light hearted jokey? What with all the smiley faces? Anyway I had sex right up until I was over due but then I wasn't uncomfortable/in pain.

There are few things more likely to turn a woman off having sex with a particular man ever again than him badgering her and sulking about it.

Rapist? I really think the op intended this to be light heArted she doesn't sound upset as she keeps :)

First time poster with a sudden and 180° behaviour/attitude change from the DH? 🤔

DP and I didn't have sex from 5 months pregnant until 4 months after I have birth. I was far too sore and uncomfortable.

You’re never BU to not want sex

He is being a thoroughly vile dick to pressure you.

Tell him to go have a wank.

Was he actually harassing you and insisting, or just being insensitive and tactless because he read it's ok to have sex throughout pregnancy?
OP hasn't come across as someone being seriously pressured.
It's ridiculous to jump to the conclusion that the man is an aggressive bully if you don't know how it was said ffs!
Calling him vile and suggesting OP should LTB is being hysterical.
He needs educating OP.. sex is fine throughout pregnancy, only if YOU want it.

Who ever you are DH, you shouldn't need anyone but your wife's answer on when she wants sex. And nagging for sex is the biggest turn off in history. She doesn't need a doctor's note or the backing of another hundred women saying no. And I will warn you now, most people don't feel up to sex for months after and your sex life will reduce with a young child anyway. So get used to it.

He feels very ashamed of him self and says he now understands and we will not be having sex until well after baby is here and he's so sorry for being at twat smile

My DH didn't get any from me for a whole 9 months when I was pg with DD and then a year after. If he was bothered he didn't show it. With DS I was fine up to week 30 and then from 6 weeks pp.

Your DH is a pathetic, controlling cretin. He has zero say over your marvellous, baby-making body.

the books say you can SAFELY have sex until you give birth - that does it means it's comfortable for everyone and therefore your partner should go get stuffed. Consent means 2 people willing and happy to have sex with each other - not where one is doing it because she feels she has to to make him happy. He needs to get used to the idea that once you have kids your sex life will most likely decrease in some way or other.

He's not abusive so I'm a bit shocked at the responses on here!! He is also very much hands on in all ways around the house- he's just a bit full on sexually at the moment. Normally I'm well up for a romp but lately I just want to be left alone.

I have 3DC's with an extremely abusive ex partner so I know what real abuse actually is.

I'm a regular poster but namechanged for this.

Blimey I said to him as a joke this morning to stop being a sex pest or I'll see what the good ladies of Mumsnet have to say about this... he was shocked to say the least!

Our relationship is very loving ... possibly too loving and this is the first time I've ever really not wanted it which I think he's struggling to understand.

I'm also barely showing pregnancy wise which probably doesn't help as I don't really look pregnant despite being near the end.

But thankyou anyway for your replies- it's been very eye opening for both of us! And yes he was really shocked & upset at being called a rapist 😮

I'm not surprised he was shocked at being called a rapist since he hasn't raped anyone.

He hasn't raped anyone but I hope he realises it's totally unacceptable that he pressures you for sex

Just remember this tread when you complain he isn't intimimate with you anymore in a few years. There are lots of ways to give and receive pleasure without sex and if you are pushing him away now, it's not going to get better for the first few years of the child's life.

He isn't being vile.

And given the range of threads on men wanking at times and places that annoy their partners that is no longer a viable solution either.

YADNBA! Who cares what guidance says about how long you can keep having sex - this is your body and how you feel. No-one is entitled to sex, and he should absolutely be respecting your wishes.

"There are lots of ways to give and receive pleasure without sex "

He wants sex though.
Not for them to feed grilled pork dumplings to each other or whatever alternative you had in mind.

It's pretty obvious posters have not taken any notice of the tone of OPs original post or much of what she has said since. Far too quick to attack a man without bothering to know the facts.
The slightest comment about a man wanting sex has him condemned as a rapist or abuser.
It's quite sad.
Good luck with the rest of your pregnancy OP, and I hope you both get back on track as and when you are comfortable.

Good grief. Tell him to bash one out in the shower, ffs.

I didn't have sex at all during my last pregnancy because penetrative sex always causes me to have big bleeds (in pregnancy) and I had previously miscarried right after sex a few years ago. It happens. And it was an awful way to miscarry (it's awful enough any way it occurs ). Anyway... yeah so... shower for one it is!

Sorry OP but I still think it's a bit grim that he's pressuring you into sex, even if you say it's all lighthearted.

I had HG with my second pregnancy - there was no sex.