In a fury re queue in cafe who was first

[Viviennemary]

I was in a fury earlier this afternoon. re this scenario. DH said he thought I was in the wrong but I don't think I was. We went into this café/deli type place for tea. A woman was just in front of me through the door. She went to the deli counter. There is a sign just before the seating part that says queue here to be seated so I stood there. I was the only one in that queue. Then she called over table for two and swept passed. No other tables free.

So DH went out. As he probably thought I'd say something. Then they said around five minutes. So I said I'd be back later and that I could have shouted too. It has really put me off going in this place again although the food is nice. We went somewhere else which was nice too. But was really annoyed. (I know it's trivial.) DH said she was in the café first. So she was first. But she wasn't in the queue. Grrrrrr!!!

Horrid story about where queue jumping can lead

www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-birmingham-42746941

Intotheflood it was probably the same lady, with a new technique to add to her repertoire of best queue jumps....

Yep she was a dick but I wouldn’t get wound up about it just because it’s not worth it, at least you know you’re the better person! You can’t claim to be first when you’re in the deli not the cafe, that’s just not how it works.

But Rhoda - re your comment about stepping out of lines. When you are in a Q as a single adult with children - sometimes you do have to step out look at the food available and step back in . I had no idea that someone could possibly think that was out of order

Oh no I didn't mean that scenario. God knows, I'm a single parent and have had to do that. I've often left my DS in the line as a placeholder!

What I mean is in like a supermarket queue and someone is on their own with a full trolley or basket and suddenly decides they need something else and leaves the queue. I've had people leave, taking their basket with them and expect to come back to where they were. I've also had people leave their trolley to hold their place, or worse, unload their trolley onto the conveyor belt then say "Oh I just need to get x!" and disappear for several minutes.

Once a person left their trolley, so the cashier asked me to come forward, the person came back after I'd unloaded and we were halfway through scanning (so a good few minutes) and got really arsey that the cashier hadn't waited for them because they were next!

Simply stepping away for a second to look closer at something is a different matter.

I have read and reread this thread and still have no idea what actually happened.

I feel the writing is on the wall for OP's DH. He is going to go the way of Anne Boleyn for his lack of loyalty.

YABU. She was in the deli first. Why should you have taken the table just because she didn't stand in the right place?

You sound very stressful.

anyone else thinking OMG , if the OP is like that without caffeine what happens when she has a double espresso?

Vivienne It’s no wonder bitcoin leaves you so distraught if a possible queue jumper puts you into a fury! You said there was a possible five minute wait for the next table which, IMO, is pretty minimal. I would have just waited. I mean if you were that upset, you could have spent your meal shooting daggers at the horrid queue jumper.

She was first inside. If she had stood in the queue she would have been first to be seated.

You got into a "fury"?

"fury" is a bit of an over-reaction, but I would have been a bit miffed too, OP.

I'm very much an obeyer of rules, so if the sign said wait in a certain place, then I would have done.

So I don't think you're being U to be a bit annoyed.

OK - so I go into a café, there's no one waiting in the 'Wait here to be Seated' queue. I wander over to the deli counter, hear ' Who's next?' and (knowing there was no one waiting when I came in, so I'm next) call 'Table for two,' and go to the table. No big deal really for the person who came in AFTER me, is it?

The perhaps most telling bit of the OP is that DH hastily left the premises. Perhaps he has had enough of his DW's 'fury' at the slightest setback. Anger management?

She was in her own bubble of self importance whereby she was first in the queue and entitled to wander off as she pleased, whilst retaining the right to take the first available table.

Other than joining her at said table and staring her out until she admitted defeat, there was little else you could have done without creating a drama queen scene.

Blimey, there's trivial and then there's minuscule mouse sized fart trivial.

I agree with the above comment.

🙄

I agree - the fact that OPs Dh fled the scene before OP could erupt into fury makes me think she has form for ridiculous behaviour.

If it's a British thing to queue, what's the alternative?

In a fury over that?

Its a much nicer life to choose (and I say that deliberately) to not be offended by things.

That might not be your first impulse but after initial impulse you do have control of where your thoughts take you next.

You have spent today feeling really wound up inside, its ruined part of your day, its caused your husband to not want to hear about it anymore, you could have shouted..there is a different way but it does take effort which is why lots of people don't choose it.

Some of these replies have made me laugh. So that's something! Just think I could have bought the whole café if only I'd invested in bitcoin at the right time. Oh no make that the whole town.

”If my Sheridan were here he'd be appalled!”

Yes, you could have bought the whole town, made yourself sheriff and banned queue jumpers from setting foot in it.

Hindsight is such a wonderful thing.

I was accused of queue jumping today but I hadn’t done so.
I had simply moved to the other end of the counter so that the customer being served could reach the card machine (which was bizarrely right over the other side of the till).
As I was doing this a couple of people started to queue up behind the woman who was being served.

The shop assistant had already seen me and then started to serve me. Cue the other customers muttering about queue jumpers. The shop assistant didn’t say anything. I should have explained, but was annoyed because I was automatically accused of queue jumping because they thought I was queuing when I was actually moving up.
The counter was very long and there were several places at which to queue.

I have put this one down to bad design and everyone being busy, and have let it go.

Hope it helped you to post your AIBU, OP, and that you are not as furious now.

Confession. I have form for getting wound up over trivia.

Really? Even if it's really interesting? Is this going to infuriate you? ...

In Japan, letting a sumo wrestler make your baby cry is considered good luck.

Between 1900 and 1920, Tug of War was an Olympic event.

After OutKast sang “Shake it like a Polaroid picture,” Polaroid released a statement that said, “Shaking or waving can actually damage the image.”