To think this is a bit of an over-reaction on DH's part?

[MiniMummy576]

I posted an AIBU a while ago about wanting DH to take notice of the chores that need doing around the house. Following the advice I put together a weekly schedule and put it on the fridge (I got the template from Mydarlaclementine.com and found it really useful to set out everything that needs doing on a weekly and monthly basis and split it over the week!!) with asterisks next to anything that DH can pitch in with.
One of the daily tasks is to spray the bathroom surfaces with the daily cleaner after the shower's been used (one of the ones that doesn't need to be wiped off). I asked DH to remember to do this as he has a shower every morning. He's been a bit sporadic with remembering, but this morning after coming out of the bathroom I heard him rush back in and start spritzing.
The only 'problem' was that the old bottle of spray had run out, so I'd bought a new one and reused the bottle to mix up a Zoflora spray, but hadn't had time to write on the bottle what it was or get the new one out of the cupboard.
DH made a point of proudly mentioning to me that he'd remembered to spritz the shower and I thanked him, but pointed out that I'd now switched the bottle, so he needed to use the different brand from now on.
He then threw up his hands and said 'Oh FFS that's the last time that I'm bothering to do it then'
I said there was no need to get annoyed, he'd just have to look out for a different bottle.
Then he said 'Well you should have told me before I wasted my time spraying the shower. I suppose you want me to respray it'
I told him no, the shower spray can't be sprayed over the top of another cleaner, but that the stuff in the bottle is disinfectant, so it didn't matter for today.
'FFS, you can do it yourself from now on then' he said.
I pointed out it wasn't a problem, he hadn't done anything wrong and all I was saying was that he needs to look out for the new bottle but he wasn't having any of it.

Is it just me or was this a (completely baffling) over-reaction from DH over such a little thing???

[Marcine]

BitOut - totally but what should the OP do if he won't just do it?

[rwalker]

sorry i'm with him you made the mistake i would of just left it and sorted later . Nothing worse than doing something and having it checked and faults pointed out we all do thing differently and have different standards. Did what you asked then u picked fault with it so sorry i would tell you to do it yourself in future

[Regularsizedrudy]

Marcine then I would get a new husband. Seriously I could not be with someone who wanted me to act fluke their mother it turns my stomach.

[Regularsizedrudy]

Act like*

[BitOutOfPractice]

If I had the answer to that Marcine I would be a millionaire. I have lived with four different men over the years and none of them have even been remotely like this

I know that even if I'd made a mistake and accidentally moved in with a man like this I would not have got to the "how come I'm doing everything stage!

[DenPerry]

Why on earth are you spraying a shower anyway!?

[Marcine]

I don't think telling the OP to either do it all herself or LTB is all that helpful.

[Bluelady]

It isn't. Getting a cleaner n the other hand ...

[Joey7t8]

If you both work full time, then why not get a cleaner?

[Dazedandconfuzzled]

He has a job list on the fridge?? He's a grown man ffs. Maybe he felt like he was trying to do what you wanted and it still wasn't good enough for you. Surely it will blow over by evening.
However it does sound like their are more problems than just one small job.

[Pfftkids]

Does he get a sticker every day if he remembers to do his chores

[BitOutOfPractice]

Or how about just doing your own stuff and ignoring the rest? I dunno. I think this is the answer than millions of women are looking for which is deeply depressing and and of itself

[Marcine]

I wonder who would get to tidy up before the cleaner comes, do all the daily cleaning and tidying in between cleaner visits, and organise and pay the cleaner...

[Fairylea]

No shower needs spritzing every day. Madness.

A bathroom needs a clean once a week. That’s it. Toilets every day if you’re fussy about them like I am but honestly showers and baths etc every few days at most but once a week is absolutely fine.

You’re making life hard work for yourselves. No wonder he snapped!

[mirime]

We can't all afford to get a cleaner, even if we both work full-time.

It also doesn't fix the under-lying problem.

[Marcine]

I'd not heard of daily shower spray before, but we have lots of limescale and actually a daily preventative spray sounds like it would make life a lot easier.

[ReanimatedSGB]

I bet he nearly came in his pants when he realised he had an excuse to shout at you and refuse to do any more domestic work.

PP blaming the OP for micromanaging - she's tried all sorts of other methods to get this lazy prick to do his fair share and is trying the list at the moment to stop him using but you have to tell me what to do because my penis-brain is completely incapable of retaining any information about boring housework apart from 'wait till a woman does it' as an excuse.

[helenoftroyville]

Spreadsheets with asterisks, daily shower spritzing and bottle switching.....you sound very high maintenance, poor bloke

[waterrat]

The whole process..list...asterix..etc sounds highly tedious. My husband is tidier than I am so I can give a different perspective...if you genuinely feel you need to constantly micro manage him maybe you need to accept you care more than he does and get a cleaner...

I would have flipped like him as well- its the context of constantly feeling in thr wrong then finding I was wrong anyway for no reason.

I hate the assumption that the cleaner tidier person must always be in the right!!

[ClareB83]

What @ReanimatedSGB said.

[Bluelady]

Of course it solves the underlying problem. Neither of them wants to do housework, get a cleaner neither of them has to. I reckon half the men being nagged about housework would pay for a cleaner in a heartbeat.

[Marcine]

Bluelady who can afford to have a cleaner come in every day and do all their housework?

[Bluelady]

Doesn't have to be every day. Wtf needs doing ever day?

[expatinscotland]

It's a bit presumptuous to assume that just because two people work FT they can all afford a cleaner because one partner is a lazy fucker who thinks housework isn't his/her job.

[IJoinedJustToPostThis]

Uuurgh.

He's telling you you're unreasonable so he can get out of doing the housework.