Martial arts instructor keeps punching me in the stomach

[Xombie]

He's old school and is doing it to show me my guard is shit but he doesn't seem to do it to anyone else? He also picks on me a bit, constantly takes the piss out of me and constantly uses me to demonstrate moves on even though I'm a low grade. He's not like this with anyone else.

Does he just really hate me or what? He's never properly hurt me but I'm scared shitless of him and feel anxious and nervous whenever he comes near me as it usually results in me being hit in some way.

If he did it with everyone I wouldn't be bothered but out of a class of other men and women, I'm the only one he's like this with??? I don't know what I've done to make him dislike me so much?

Sounds more like he could fancy you?

Ask him to do the demonstration on others as you can’t learn properly without watching it.

Don't go. It sounds awful.

Test his guard by kicking him in the balls.

Seriously though, there is no need to deliver an actual punch to show a poor guard.

I worked with a really nasty twat who made my life hell and before he left (sacked) he admitted it was because he fancied me.
Fucking moron.

I think this might be he same thing.

Change classes.

Sounds like he could fancy you? ????? WTAF? Sure - a man hits you, he must fancy you. Ffs.

What?

Go for his fucking balls next time!!

Or don't go. He's a bully.

He's being unreasonable. You could ask him to demonstrate on someone else, and tell him he cant expect a beginner to have the responses of someone with a higher grade.
But I'd be looking for a club with a better attitude.

Sounds horrible. Look for somewhere else as you've said he makes you feel scared, anxious and nervous and he takes the piss out of you and punches you in the stomach. Maybe report him to the professional body

Sounds more like he could fancy you?

We don’t say this to eight year olds in the playground any more. Let’s not say it to an adult woman.

Why stress? Just leave. He sounds like a piece of shit. There’ll be other classes out there.
If he asks why your leaving tell him why.

If you want to continue and he asks you to go up and demonstrate just say no. Say it every single time. If he starts getting arsey day no because I feel you deliberately hurt me and pick on me.
If he argues and says I’m showing you you weaknesses say well today demonstrate in someone else.

Change class. There are many fine people who do martial arts but some are sadistic bullies. They are to be avoided.

Fancies her??

Let's see. Man finds woman attractive. Man expresses his affection by punching woman in stomach, verbally mocking and being a general bully.

Sounds about right actually.

Seriously though, whatever the reason may be you don't have to put up with this you know op.

You wouldn't put up with it if your child was treated like this in a club would you? Don't put up with it for yourself either.

Have you, you know, spoken to him?

Told him to stop, said you don't want to be the demoee?

After every class he comes over to me and tells me I'm improving and doing really well so why the negativity during the class?

If you want to continue and he asks you to go up and demonstrate just say no. Say it every single time. If he starts getting arsey day no because I feel you deliberately hurt me and pick on me.
If he argues and says I’m showing you you weaknesses say well today demonstrate in someone else.

This. Call him on it, in public.
If that doesn't work then find another class.

After every class he comes over to me and tells me I'm improving and doing really well so why the negativity during the class?

Gaslighting? Says one thing in private, another in public.

Fuck that, is he a sole operator or works for a company?
If he works for a company I’d contact them requesting you move to another class or you’re moving to a new company based on - then tell them exactly what he’s doing. They then know people will leave his classes because of his conduct, hopefully protecting other people from him.
If he’s a sole operator, I’d give a call and say I’ll no longer be attending your class, because- then tell him. He can play it off how he likes, but he needs to hear you’re not finding it funny or a joke because it’s bloody offensive and a horrible way to treat paying clients.

Fuck sake - he fancies her?! that is a truly ridiculous statement.
Stop going to class, find another instructor.

Find another class. You shouldn't feel nervous of him. If you change styles, you may have to repeat a belt or two, but it'll be worth it. Don't waste time on worrying about his motivation, just remove him from your life.

I had an old-style instructor who really took the piss out of the young boys, and pushed them very hard (they however loved it) - but he was consideration itself to me. He always demonstrated on the older ones, sometimes me, but pulled his punches, so if he got through your guard you just felt a flick. I was never in the least bit scared sparring with him, despite him being 5th Dan. What you're experiencing is not what martial arts training should feel like.

Say you would rather watch than be involved in the demonstration. If he persists leave the class or complain

This situation is not right. Either call him out or change classes. Good luck.

Kick him in the balls and see how he likes that!

He sounds like a very particular type of man that targets a woman he finds attractive and belittles her in public as a way of getting a thrill. He knows you're somewhat powerless in that situation and he clearly enjoys making you feel that way.

The fact that he finds you attractive is neither here nor there by the way - it doesn't change the fact that he's an utter dick.

If you can, avoid him at all costs and refuse to take part in the demonstrations. If you don't feel up to that, leave. He is bad news.

He's not an employee, he owns the club! He's an 8th dan.