So I am 38 weeks pregnant with my 3rd child. First 2 were born in the UK. DS was planned homebirth with transfer to hospital and then forceps because of placenta position and cord holding him in. DD was elective caesarean because she was breach. Community and hospital MWs were amazing.
This baby is being born in another country and basically my MW is always telling me that everything I plan and have been advised in the UK is wrong and it is really getting me down.
I want to avoid an epidural if possible because I don't want to stay in hospital. However, midwife is telling me that all other pain relief is bad for the baby so I should either have the epidural or have no pain relief at all.
She says I can't have a bath for 3 weeks after the birth because it causes infections but they were my salvation after my first.
She won't do sweeps because they cause infection but they won't let me go more than 10 days over before induction. I really don't want to be induced but babies are generally late in our family and DS was 12 days over.
She doesn't want DH in the delivery room. She says she will guide me through the process. I have put my foot down about this as there is nobody I want there more than him.
I could list hundreds of things she has said which are contrary to the way we do things in the Uk but these are probably the biggest.
My AIBU is this: should I be able to expect an element of flexibility because I come from a different country and because I have done this before or should I just suck it up? A lot of what she says doesn't even make sense to me and I feel that because I am foreign the fact that I have already had 2 children and therefore experience doesn't count.
She hasn't had children FWIW.