To think this is a deal breaker?

[inmyshoos]

If you are dating someone and you discover through chat that you have opposing political views, would that be a deal breaker for you?
Im not hugely political at all, but know enough to vote confidently, I just wonder if it will cause issue doen the line because his morals will be so different to mine. Not that I mind him having his own opinions. He likes different music to me that is fine. Likewise most other things. But this feels different.

Fwiw there are a few other potential deal breakers but this is the one that is playing on my mind most!

AIBU?

Wouldnt be a deal breaker for me. Who knows you may sway them to your way of thinking in years to come or vice versa?
I think it would depend how incested in politics you are but it wouldnt bother me.

Interested not incested

Interested not incested

Could be for me, would depend on where his political allegiances lay.

Depend a on exactly what views are opposing.

Yeah it would be an issue for me. If you have opposing political views, you are basically completely different people.

It would be for me. My political views are moderate but deeply felt.

OH and I don't vote for the same party. But our political views overlap to a large extent.

It depends how opposing the views were, and if they were happy to have a civil discussion rather than being all high-and-mighty-everyone-else-is-wrong. I think a far-left person and a far-right would never be able to maintain a relationship because their entire worldview is built on such different ideals but possibly if both were more moderate and able to find some common ground despite disagreeing then it might be workable. From experience though I'd say it would probably lead to arguments

It would for me

Would and doesn't bother DP and I, my views are very different to his, as are my family's views to his family's.
we really only talk politics if something big is happening (say leading up to an election) are are both respectful of each other's views (even if mine are right 😁)
It has been awkward a couple of times when at events with his family as they share the same views and I am the odd one out. For peace and harmony I keep quiet unless they say something offensive and then I just say "well I'm afraid we will have to agree to disagree there".
It works fine for us, but would never be a deal breaker for us as neither are particularly entrenched in politics and also don't have a particularly strong desire to be right all the time!

wouldn't and doesn't

Depends. I could cope with another mainstream party because most British politics is pretty centre ground. I could not cope with a Ukipper or a communist - extremes.

Also, passionate Unionist so I would struggle with a committed Yesser (Scotland).

Depends how extreme the views are really

It would be for me, because political views are a bellwether for a person's attitude to all kinds of things, and I would struggle to be romantically involved with someone who felt very differently to me on issues like gay rights, trans rights, abortion, welfare state, racism etc.

I have friends who I don't agree with politically and that's fine - but you don't set up home and raise kids with your friends.

I know it works for some couples but it never would for me.

Depends on the level of difference. I could live with a level of difference in appropriate levels of state intervention in heavy industry but not with someone who wants to cut taxes radically and send all the immigrants home.

Values are more important but if political views are really divergent I think it would be a deal breaker for me.

After all, parties change over time and I've voted for at least three different parties in the course of my voting life.

Attitudes towards welfare, bringing up children, marriage, housing, healthcare, education etc. are far more important.

If they were the sort to start political debates with me over any topic them it would be a non starter for me. It might be interesting in the beginning but it would be so tiring after a while as my views aren't for turning.

I'm a Conservative voter and although I have had relationships with Labour supporters, they have been more to the centre than the rabid left.

Depends if you can both behave around the issue. I personally don't mind an opppsing view but I do mind being told I'm wrong and being patronised about it. That's the deal breaker for me

DH and I have always supported different political parties and it hasn’t been a huge issue however the Scottish Referendum threw up a LOT of problems and it was a very difficult few months ( he is a YES and I am a Unionist ) it is still a touchy subject and in fact we had another disagreement today following Sturgeon talking about another Ref .

I should add that the main issue around Indyref is that DH keeps saying I don’t understand the subject which drives me mad !!

Kinda depends suppose like pp depends on how big the difference is. I have friends of different persuasions but the most right wing is Tory and I can be friends with but couldn't date a Tory. Our views and approach to life would just be too different.

Anyone even further right wing than that (ukip and beyond) I wouldn't even be friends with.

But then I know I'd be far too lefty for some too.

I agree it speaks to someone's fundamental belief system. I also couldn't/wouldn't date someone very religious but plenty of friends who are.

It depends how extreme. I'm centre right, centre left isn't too dissimilar. Far left or far right might be too extreme for me, but would depend on the person himself.