Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Concerned about something 3 year old said

102 replies

missladybird · 04/01/2018 16:34

Today dd started a new nursery. Apparently it all went well and she seemed happy when I picked her up etc.

About an hour ago she said she needed the toilet and then said "there's a plug in my bum" - I asked where she heard that from and she said "the naughty lady". I asked where the naughty lady is and she just pointed in a random direction.

I left it for a bit and then asked her about it again. I asked where the plug is and she opened her labia and pointed inside.

I'm seriously freaking out about this. What do I do?

OP posts:
DullAndOld · 04/01/2018 16:35

did she see someone changing their tampon?
If so , move her, that is gross.

Original poster
missladybird · 04/01/2018 16:39

I have no idea. She's only just turned 3 so I'm not getting much sense out of her. Do I ring the nursery?

OP posts:
SammySays · 04/01/2018 16:39

Could she have seen someone use a tampon? Confused I can’t imagine why she would have seen that today though or why she would say ‘the naughty lady’. I can imagine how worried you are, I would probably feel the same. I have no experience and am at a bit of a loss at what to suggest. She is a child though and sometimes they come out with really random weird things so it could all be perfectly innocent. Hopefully that’s the case.

RunningOutOfCharge · 04/01/2018 16:41

Can she point out the naughty lady next time she's at nursery?

arethereanyleftatall · 04/01/2018 16:42

I would also assume tampon.
I guess plug is a reasonable way to describe it to 3yo.
But, how the f did your dd see her changing one?
Phone them, it might be something like dd pushing open the toilet door?

CuppaSarah · 04/01/2018 16:42

Go talk to the manager, if they are a setting worth anything they will take it very seriously. If they don't, contact ofsted and move her immediately. Chances are it's one of those strange misunderstandings that young children make, but you're right to check.

DontOpenDeadInside · 04/01/2018 16:42

Can you ask what colour the plug is? Might rule out a tampon?

Thesmallthings · 04/01/2018 16:45

Don't ask her any more question.. esp don't ask her to point them out. Or did she do this.. Or that... You could put answers into her head with out meaning to.

If you feel like you have to question ask is she looking forward to going back to nursery so if she wants to open up she can.
I would talk to social services and the police they will be qualified to interveiw her. Most importantly write down exactly what she says and date and time it.

gunsandbanjos · 04/01/2018 16:48

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Aridane · 04/01/2018 16:53

Social services and police??

Original poster
missladybird · 04/01/2018 16:53

guns if you're even considering accusing me of being a troll you need to fuck off. This is serious

OP posts:
DivisionBelle · 04/01/2018 16:56

Has she ever seen you change a tampon?

gunsandbanjos · 04/01/2018 16:56

I was simply voicing an opinion after a spate of creepy threads lately. Don’t be so rude.

Graceflorrick · 04/01/2018 16:57

Don’t ask her anything else as you don’t want to put words into her mouth. Call the police and report it.

DeStijl · 04/01/2018 16:59

Yes I'd ask about the colour, that might give you more idea of what it is.
Don't assume anything at the moment, try to get as much information as you can as carefully as you can.

Sophia1984 · 04/01/2018 17:01

Is it not that she’s said she needs to go to the loo a lot and a nursery worker could have jokingly (but very inappropriately!) said “you need to put a plug in your bum”? It’s the fact she says that she has one that makes me think it’s not about a tampon..

ItsNYlyme · 04/01/2018 17:01

Misslady, I would be worried as well.
On her first day she comes home saying weird things about plugs in bottom and showing inside her labia. And naughty lady???
Speak to the Manager and see if they can explain what could have happened to make her say that.
I wouldn't just leave it.

Knittedfairies · 04/01/2018 17:01

Please talk to the manager first, before Social Services and the police. Obviously if you don't get any satisfaction from speaking to him/her, then is the time to escalate. Procedures for safe-guarding etc need to be followed.

horatioisabrick · 04/01/2018 17:01

Is it possible that your DD needed the loo, the loos were occupied and Idk... the "naughty lady" was maybe stressed and told her to "plug it up"? Or maybe the workers were talking amongst themselves and saying that someone had a stick up their butt?
(not saying that this is particularly appropriate either, btw)

Do not continue to ask her further questions.

Stay calm, write down what she said and when.

Aeroflotgirl · 04/01/2018 17:01

Mabey she walked in on staff changing her tampon, and staff explained what it was. Sometimes staff share toilets with kids, and Mabey the Louis don't have locks. I would check with the manager next time your in.

MrsLinManuelMiranda · 04/01/2018 17:02

Could this be something that she had witnessed previously, but was only now recalling? Has she seen you change your tampon? I would call nursery to put your mind at ease.

Nikephorus · 04/01/2018 17:06

Maybe she peered under a cubicle door...

January87 · 04/01/2018 17:06

Aeroflotgirl, this is something I would want reported to parents if it happened to their child.Just mentioned at pick up time 'X walked in on X in the loo and we explained it X way'

ghostyslovesheets · 04/01/2018 17:06

just have a chat with nursery - quiet possible someone told her to 'put a plug in it' if she was waiting for the loo - rather than anything sinister

We have daily threads about toilets and small children - always from the same PBP/Troll so please don't be too cross at people raising the odd eyebrow

GreatDuckCookery6211 · 04/01/2018 17:08

I'm confused why she would refer to her as naughty.