To ask DP to cancel 9.45pm restaurant booking

[Thewindkeptmeawake]

DP & I were reading the Sunday papers which featured a restaurant close to us. I mentioned it may be nice to go for my birthday which is coming up.
He immediately emailed & called them & eventually got a booking for a Saturday evening but at 9.45pm.

I feel ungrateful but it is too late for me - I’m thinking starters won’t be served until 10.30 !

Am I being ungrateful?

I wouldn't assume starters won't be until 10.30pm! My experience is that most well-organised places know that those having a late serving want to get started, and will work hard to get you seated and served quickly.

I second the idea of turning up 45 mins early. Worst case scenario - you get to sit and sip champagne for 45 minutes. Best case scenario - you get seated straight away.

Alternatively, there must be other good restaurants nearby? Why not save this one for another day?

Far too late - I would ask to cancel

I'd go for the stab yourself in the stomach option....every time.

I don't think you're being ungrateful, and I would hate such a late booking too. I probably wouldn't be able to sleep after eating so late, so my birthday 'treat' would become memorable for all the wrong reasons!

Perfectly acceptable time for an adults only dinner. Attitudes like this ensure you won’t get nice things in the future.

If I remember right, by then the choice was between your eye, or a bullet in the head.

Nice thought on his part, but like you it would be too late for me, so I'd rather cancel.

Yes you would like to go there-but not at any price iyswim.

Attitudes like this ensure you won’t get nice things in the future

Ah Raving, good to see you bringing your sunny, positive disposition as always

We went out for dinner last week. A rare occasion. 7.30 booking. Three courses, a few glasses of wine, a few cocktails, home by 9.30, in bed by 9.45. Felt a bit guilty only paying the baby sitter for two hours, but I can't imagine only starting to eat after 10. I'm not Spanish.

It doesn't really matter what anyone else says, OP, if it's too late for you then that's that.

It is nice of your DH to have tried but he hasn't really gone to that much effort has he. I'm sure you can just bank this one for another evening at a better time for you, or as a PP said, ask to be informed of any cancellations, without offending him.

I would be pleased my DH had been thoughtful enough to actually lift the phone and book it in the first place tbh. I wouldn't ask him to cancel it, sometimes it's nicer just to get on with things and this is one of those completely harmless situations. Im amazed at the amount of adults that couldn't eat at 9.30/10 ish, particularly as it's a one off. I guess some people jus like to moan. I would be really happy with my DH efforts in this situation.

Way too late for me, I hate eating late.

Raving, not an acceptable time for some adults, everyone's different. "Attitudes like this ensure that you won't get nice things in the future" unnecessarily harsh

" I would be really happy with my DH efforts in this situation."

And there it is!

The an made an effort, Op, how dare you not go along with it, even though it wouldn't suit you!

God forbid that you might say to him-how lovely of you but I'd rather go at an earlier time.

@thewindkeptmeawake

Way way way too late. For me, and probably 90% of the UK population.

You will, of course, get many posters on here saying it's early, and they often have dinner at a restaurant at 10.30-11pm.

In reality, most restaurants will stop serving meals at 10pm, and alcohol at 10.30pm. (11pm at the latest.)

Who the hell wants to be stuffing a 3 course meal 2 hours before midnight? No-one that's who.

Not here, and not in Europe either. (Or any other continent for that matter.)

I have travelled to other countries often enough to know that people do not generally go out for a meal at 10pm. 8.00-8.30pm is fairly normal, (although 7.00-7.30pm is more common,) but no way is it normal to go for a meal out, at 10pm!

The suggestion to go and have a sleep in the late afternoon (to build up an appetite apparently!) is terrible. Forcing myself to go to sleep in the afternoon, would make me feel like shit. And no WAY would I feel like going out for a meal at 10pm!

Tell your DH to alter it to 8pm. Or find another restaurant.

Have you ever been to the west end, frog? Lots and lots of people eat at 9.30, 10, 10.30 etc after the shows. It's not that weird!!

Actually that should be who the hell wants to sit DOWN for a meal 2 hours before midnight? You probably won't even get the starters til 10.15pm, and the main at 11pm! (If you are lucky!) No way!

I have travelled to other countries often enough to know that people do not generally go out for a meal at 10pm. 8.00-8.30pm is fairly normal, (although 7.00-7.30pm is more common,) but no way is it normal to go for a meal out, at 10pm!

You may have travelled to other countries, but obviously not southern Italy or Spain, where sitting down for a meal at 10pm is totally normal and restaurants are completely deserted (and often not open) at 7.

The an made an effort, Op, how dare you not go along with it, even though it wouldn't suit you!

My point was not that we should go along with every effort our partners ever make. My point was I would be pleased with that particular effort.

Answer as predicted above there ^

Of course I have been to the West end, and at no point have I ever gone out for a meal AFTER a show that finishes at 10.00-10.30pm.

We are not including going for a kebab or grabbing a pizza from dominos @rebeccaslicker

some posters here would love the weddings when people don't start sitting down until 9 or 10pm

frog. I think you will find in most big cities in the UK there are many many late eaters. London has been given as a good example, but it is not the only place.

Not everyone works 9-5, eats at 6pm and goes to bed at 10.30.

I think if OP doesn't want to eat then, then cancel it - it doesn't sound like this place is so special that it's worth taking a booking there at any cost.

However, I think the people on this thread who are outraged that anyone would eat so late are weird! Personally, I hate, hate, hate when someone else arranges a dinner at a restaurant that starts before 8 or 8.30 - dinner that finishes before 9 doesn't feel like a dinner out at all to me. But then I grew up in a house where we ate dinner at around 8.30, and was astonished that some of my friends ate theirs at 5, which I consider to be mid-afternoon. DH and I now mostly don't sit down to eat dinner until gone 9. It's all personal preferences, and there isn't one way that's better!

That's very late, I'd be in bed.

OP, you can eat dinner whenever you wish. If this reservation is no good, book somewhere else or the same restaurant for another date, at the time of your choice.