To request no more of certain items?

[itsnosoap]

Only if asked what I want for future birthday/Christmas presents of course!

This Christmas I got three sets of Soap & Glory stuff (which I used to like but now makes me feel a bit queasy), two sets of 'cute animal' socks and two lots of Hotel Chocolat, of which I am not a fan. All gifts given by close family members.

WIBU to say I don't need anymore of these items, if asked what I would like in future? I will be donating it all to Women's Aid or a food bank, so it won't go to waste, and of course I was very grateful and thankful for the gifts. I just seem to get these items every year and it seems a bit daft to let it carry on.

There are some things you just cant say though. When it's someone who genuinely thinks they've bought you a treat, and spent quite a lot on it, after thanking them profusely for years you just can't say anything.

When DC were at primary school it all went in a box for tombola / raffle prizes.

decant it into pump bottles and use in the downstairs loo
Genius! Why did I never think of that.

I would definitely be regifting Prosecco; it's basically a bottle of over-rated, fizzy piss.

I am surprised that so many adults get gifts off more than a dozen other adults

We only buy for the kids in our family.

I don't think you can tell people what to buy. Just suggest that the adults stop buying for each other. There's really no need for adults to give each other gifts (unless it's your wife or husband - or maybe a parent or adult child.) Especially if it's creating 'added stress' for people!

The people complaining about people buying shit gifts - what are you buying for them? Maybe they hate your gifts just as much!

As I said, just tell them all that you no longer wish to swap gifts. What is the point when you hate what everyone buys you?

If it is close family members, you could ask well in advance not to receive certain things, or better still, say you'd prefer a charitable donation (many charities that work in developing countries do this, whereby the money goes on something specific).

Simply asking "Any ideas for Christmas presents this year?" would solve so many of these problems.

Send the Neals Yard stuff my Direction please...

No more anything unless it’s something I have asked for .
No more tea towels (my mum buys me some every year).
No more chocolate (I’m on a diet).
No more smellies (I have expczema)

Money or vouchers are always good.

An Amazon wish-list would solve your problems. Mine always has lots of things on it that I would be happy to receive. It doesn't have to just be books and films - you can add stuff from other websites to your Amazon wish-list. All of my family are delighted to choose something from my list that they know I will like.

My mum buys me a nail file kit every year. I have psoriasis and as a result my nails never grow. Every year I tell her not to bother ....

BIL has a new gf who did the christmas shopping. Thry bought me an expensive perfume set (who buys random perfume for someone they dont know well?) Which i will reguft to dm as its her kind of thing. They also go me an expensive face treatments origins box of stuff i wont use. I am currently thinking i will try and use it.

But i thanked them and pretended i liked it. Fearing getting similar next year. Im going to insist on no gifts or donations to the homeless in my name. I need to bite the bullet and get us all to wise up. This merry go round of stuff is pointless expensive and stressful.

If asked what you want just say 'Oh I'm not sure, so long as it's not chocolate, socks or smellies you can't go wrong though! I have enough left from last Xmas'.

I wonder if men get the same gift ever year issue.

Unfortunately most of the stuff listed is generic stuff.for women gifts which involves little thought. Just because we are female, it doesn't mean that we only ever want smelliest, scarfs and chocolate.

Wish lists are all very well for those that ask.

My mother and sister will always ask what I want. Other people don't. DH's family never ask and consequently I get a book I have already read or a box of chocolates I don't like. Every year.
DH did ask this year and I said please no scarves.

I'm insisting no gifts for me and dh next year. People have tried very hard to choose nice things and I appreciate the thought, but the fact is that I don't like them and won't use them, and it's a huge waste of their time and money, and my time trying to find it a good home. We visited family twice over Christmas, both times it took me an hour to unpack all the gifts for me/dh/dc once we got home. No more!

Amazon wish list is the answer as PP said.

It doesnt matter how much you spend if the recipient doesnt like the stuff, wont eat it, cant use it cos they are allergic to it etc. Its really simple. Find out what they like and use or will find it a treat and buy it. Why waste your money on something unusable to be given away so you basically got them nothing?
We only buy for 2 of the closest adults in our family and we know what they like and alternate their favourite presents each year. We get them things that make them happy. They dont cost a lot, they are very simple gifts but its what they want which is more important than lavishing loads on them they dont want. I dont want to get them what i think they should like i get them what makes them happy.
Buying for the sake of it is pointless and tells the recipient you really dont know them nor care if they like the gift or not. Its just self serving.

Next year op tell them what you want/ dont want. Make it clear you wont use x y or z so they are wasting thier money. Why cant adults respect other adults choices are different from thiers? Why not just get one present each for a specific person in a secret santa with a list of what everyone likes?

This is why Amazon wish lists are a god send. You can add to them from every website and they're there should people want ideas. Great for other people's kids too, and when someone's bought off the list the item disappears so others can't buy the same thing. You can also add notes about specific size or colour.

There's always going to be odd little extras but it does help!

these piles of overpriced crap indicate that you have all you want or need which is why no-one knows what to buy.

stop the waste of time, money and resources by stopping adult presents now. Tell them to send the equivalent direct to a charity if they want. (and that is direct, not smuggiving sites)

Tried it this year—asked my friends/family to give donation to the local homeless shelter in lieu of gifts as I have all I need. Was therefore miffed to receive two bath/shower gel sets, a hand wash set, a bunch of 'cute' coasters and a hideous plastic novelty lamp. OH thinks I am ungrateful (none of the aforementioned gifts were from him). Sigh...

I would love to stop the gift exchange, but people would be genuinely hurt, so it's simply not an option.

We didn’t do adult presents this year for just this reason.

Although we had lists in the past some family decided that they didn’t want to buy from the list but would buy —crap— gifts instead.
So we stopped adult presents altogether.

We do a Kris Kindel type thing for siblings and nieces/nephews on my side and on DH’s side. One fairly decent gift is bought.

Other than that, it’s all Amazon wish-lists and the like.

I like prosecco, hotel chocolate, news yard, and am about to go buy a nail file, looks like I should check eBay and the charity shops!

December birthday here.

NO MORE FUCKING SCARVES FOR THE LOVE OF OUR LORD BABY JESUS CHRIST.

I get at least one a year, if not multiple. Ditto for gloves. It's not even that I don't like them, it's just the same people always get me the same thing. Oh, and no more hoodies for my fiance would be nice. He has about twenty.

Definitely.

I think it's good to give an alternative like "what I really need is some nice shampoo and conditioner" so they aren't just guessing and you end up with two pairs of wellies (this happened )

I guide people to amazon wish list when they ask what the DCs want and I have one for myself that I've never actually given out but a nice way to gather what I like

It doesn't sound like there's much you can do then. An Amazon list won't work as they will still get you stuff you don't like on top of it, you can't insist they give you no gifts, you can't stop exchanging. I'd just regift the stuff in that case.