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Original poster

Smoking weed is......

607 replies

LockJawTrouble · 29/12/2017 22:17

Just trying to make sense of things. Is it me or smoking weed is not normal? I am fed up of this excuse to the point, where I think I need some reconfirmation , to make sure I am not the only one thinking that.

OP posts:
wisemum2104 · 30/12/2017 12:38

As I understand from studies, there are two types of weed smokers.

The Losers - that self harm, do nothing and bum around. Usually jobless and lives off the other half.

If you have this type then dump him.

The Creative - that have a habit that does not overtake their life, but in fact enhances their perception. Usually a very spiritual character. And usually they are good at being successful in work, business and hobbies. You can find many posts online about this.

If you are attracted to this personality type, then stop controlling him. It seems that you have a controlling issue.

These people are usually soft spirited and very nice people.

Does he refrain from responsibility? It sounds like from your posts that he has no other issues. Does he work? Does he provide? What are his aims in life?

Answer these questions first.

I found that the creative types are really successful in life. They have calm but collected manner - usually opposite to the Loser Type.

The Loser Types sleep all day, don't work and are their own worse enemy.

You say 9 years of hell? Why aren't you strong enough to decide before this? Why has it taking so long. It might sound harsh but you don't sound like you are in control of your own life - so project the blame on someone else.

Does he help around the house? Does he restrict you in any way.

Don't get me wrong - but I see the issue seems to be with you and not him. He does not sound like he has changed and if anything has stayed true to himself.

I would recommend that you look within and try to improve yourself and not let your happiness be based on other people.

And I also recommend you both see counselling - this way you both can express freely in a calm environment- you never know but he might find you controlling and as much as you, also would want to resolve any grievances.

Farmerswife36 · 30/12/2017 12:40

Never tried it and never will ! Iv no idea what it looks like or even smells like ! It's disgusting and those who try to normalise it are only doing it to make themselves feel better about using it . I am however in favour of it for medical reasons like cannabis oil for cancer patients etc my dad died of a brain tumour and I did a lot of research into cannibus oil and it was a miracle drug . My dad however would not entertain the idea as he just thought it was a drug and couldn't get into thinking of it as a medication . If he had of used it he may still be here now ? Sad

TheNaze73 · 30/12/2017 12:45

Disgusting due to the second hand smoke that others have to suffer. I think gin lovers or the “Wine o’clock” brigade are as bad as potheads when you step back and look at it

Indigo911 · 30/12/2017 12:47

Why is it disgusting @farmerswife? I only smoke it once or twice a week and have a very successful job and normal relationships with people. If I was getting drunk then it would affect my life a lot more.
Smoking weed in small quantities isn’t going to cause long term harm, just as having a couple of glasses of wine won’t.
People who smoke it excessively or drink alcohol excessively will definitely be doing themselves damage though

CurryWorst · 30/12/2017 12:52

It's illegal whatever your opinion, and if you pick and choose which law you'd like to uphold, that's also a slippery slope. Get the law changed by the usual ways if you feel strongly

Or I could just not, and carry on as a I choose? It isn't any kind of slippery slope, intelligent moral people can pick and choose according to their own ethics. I have no desire to try and change the law just because I occassionally fancy the odd joint.

CurryWorst · 30/12/2017 12:56

ts cheap because it is produced by slaves, child slaves, normally, traficked into the uk thousands of miles away from their family working all hours no pay no education not properly fed.So if you are ok with buying a product produced like that

Nice story bro, but mine is produced down the road in small batches on an organic hydroponic farm (that also supplies veg boxes, eggs and happy meat to the middle classes!) by happy farmers!

Zube · 30/12/2017 12:57

Over rated and stupidly accepted by large parts of society.

Don't get me started on Alcohol.

SumThucker · 30/12/2017 13:17

Stoners don't bother me, tbh. I've never witnessed anyone act violent from smoking weed.

OpalIridescence · 30/12/2017 13:26

wisemum that's a very neat world you have there, two types one rubbish, one spiritual?

What about all the pps who don't fit into your types?

My ex had an extremely responsible job which he kept up despite being totally dependent on and boringly obsessed with weed. He was certainly not a spiritual beauty either!

The OP is not controlling or at fault if she wishes to set certain lines in the sand. This is her life!

Original poster
LockJawTrouble · 30/12/2017 13:36

Opallrides- Thank you for responding to wise mum... check the poster history. You will get an idea

OP posts:
GnomeDePlume · 30/12/2017 13:38

For those of you who do use weed do you not worry about it turning up in testing at work or do you just not have that type of testing?

Ta1kinPeace · 30/12/2017 13:44

Alcohol and Tobacco cost the NHS / the police / the prison system
billions of pounds a year.

But they are fine because they are legal.
Hmm

If the OP's DH gave up weed he'd probably go for booze or gambling instead.
The weed is a symptom as much as a cause.

Hidingtonothing · 30/12/2017 13:45

You can see from the responses on this thread that for some people weed doesn't cause problems, they smoke 'for fun' and can choose when and how much they do it. It's when it becomes habitual it's a problem and it can have huge and detrimental effects on a person's life when that happens.

Ultimately OP it's like any addiction, as his partner you didn't cause his addiction, you can't control it and you can't cure it, you just have to decide whether you can live with it. He might give up of his own accord one day, or he might not and the only choices open to you are to accept that and live with it or leave him, sorry to be blunt.

I smoked habitually for over 20 years and those years were largely wasted, I achieved very little in that time and don't even remember much of it tbh. From your perspective it's like living with a ghost, he's not really 'there' if he's smoking all day so you're pretty much on your own anyway.

I would leave in your shoes, losing you might shock him into recovery or it might not but you need to think of yourself and not let him drag you down with him. I would start putting a practical plan together, maybe look at ways to improve your financial independence as a first step? You might find you feel better for taking some positive steps and sometimes changes in you can spark changes in those around you, it might give him the kick he needs if he sees you moving forward.

The trick though is to focus on you, do what you need to do to make your life better and leave him to decide if he wants the same enough to make the changes he needs to. It sounds like it will take time for you to be in a position to leave so he has plenty of opportunity to get on board before it's too late but it's time you started forging ahead with your life and if that means leaving him behind then so be it. Good luck Flowers

MollyHopps · 30/12/2017 13:56

I smoke it at the weekends. But DP smokes it a little more regularly than me, most nights actually.

He wants to cut down on how much he smokes because it is killing his motivation - it’s his decision and I want to support him with that. OP it sounds like your DH is quite happy living the way he is and it will be very difficult to change that when he doesn’t want to.

The question is do you want to stay with him knowing he has zero motivation to change and likely never will?

CurryWorst · 30/12/2017 14:23

For those of you who do use weed do you not worry about it turning up in testing at work or do you just not have that type of testing?

I've never been tested for anything in any job.

Indigo911 · 30/12/2017 14:26

Neither have I and I’ve worked in lots of different industries

BertieBotts · 30/12/2017 14:26

IMO it's no big deal, but it's not a normal/everyday thing either. I admit I am a bit shocked/judgy about people using it regularly - unless for medical reasons anyway.

Ta1kinPeace · 30/12/2017 14:34

I admit I am a bit shocked/judgy about people using it regularly
But alcohol and tobacco are fine ????

Tobacco is so addictive that the withdrawal chemicals are funded by the NHS
if it were introduced today it would be a Class A and banned immediately

maxthemartian · 30/12/2017 14:48

One of the problems with weed as it stands is that a lot of what is available now has been bred to have a crazily high THC content which can cause problems in those susceptible.

Someone earlier asked why, if it's such a great painkiller, doctors aren't campaigning for it's legalisation.
For one thing, medical marijuana is available in many states in the US on prescription.
For another most UK gps know next to nothing about alternative treatments.
There are few drugs for long term conditions that don't have awful side effects.

If it was legal it could be ethically and organically produced with a focus on strains that don't just get the smoker as high as possible.

My DH has the incredibly occasional bit of hash when his back is bad (smoked without tobacco). I use CBD oil. It's an amazingly useful plant if utilised correctly.

Haffiana · 30/12/2017 14:50

"Its cheap because it is produced by slaves,

child slaves, normally,

trafficked into the uk

thousands of miles away from their family

working all hours

no pay

no education

not properly fed.

So if you are ok with buying a product produced like that....."

Wait, I know the answer to this one...! Nike!

Jaxhog · 30/12/2017 14:54

Not normal, and illegal.

RoboticSealpup · 30/12/2017 15:53

"Stoners don't bother me, tbh. I've never witnessed anyone act violent from smoking weed."

I know someone who neglects their children and let's them see all manner of weird and paranoid behaviour. It's not violence but it's still abuse.

GnomeDePlume · 30/12/2017 15:59

No testing? Interesting, it's fairly commonplace in my industry but then people are using heavy machinery in public places. When word gets round that the tester is in you will generally see a few of the operators walk off site to avoid being tested. I guess they won't be confident of getting through the test.

BillyWilliamTheThird · 30/12/2017 16:03

Normal. I don't drink alcohol, and my weed is locally grown and sold within 10 miles of my home by people I know and trust. I wouldn't smoke it if it wasn't ethically sourced as the organised crime involved in most illegal drug trade horrifies me.

I am ambivalent about it being legalised though. I work with teenagers and the effect of weed on teen brains is appalling.

usernameinfinito · 30/12/2017 16:05

To me is pathetic if you do that and you are a not a teenager.

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