Children freezing in buggies

[goody2shooz]

Would you sit outside on a chair for an hour in the current weather, wearing leggings and a mid thigh-length jacket, no hat, gloves or blanket? No? Thought not - so why do so many people keep putting children in buggies without enough proper warm clothes/blanket etc!!?? Just been for a walk today in 1degree cold weather, wind chill makes it feel like -4. Came across a granmother standing chatting to two friends. All dressed in gloves, hats and parka types COATS cos of the cold weather. Little tot in pushchair facing into the cold wind wearing leggings and a jacket. Her little hands looked frozen- like the rest of her. I said (nicely)to the woman that the lo looked v chilly. Was ignored. tried again and was ignored. Wibu to mention anything? I am amazed that so many people seem unaware that a small person sitting still in a buggy needs more layers under and over them than the person keeping warm pushing the buggy. I feel so bad for these tots i keep seeing with pinched faces and blue hands. :(

Yes, I love nothing more than a friendly chat about my child's clothing (or a.n other aspect of their apparel/behaviour etc) whilst trying to get my kids to school or go about our daily business.

Strangers sticking their oar in upsets my son as well although at least he is big enough now to make them wary of him when he aims a kick at them.

Reminds me of the story my mum tells Bubbleo when I was a toddler and we were on holiday in Spain in Spring, so roughly UK August temperatures. I had a little dress on and every nana within a mile came to chastise them for the lack of cardigan. Here in Italy, you decide clothing based on date, not weather. If it is April, even if it is hotter than the Sun, no shorts or sandals. Preferably a jumper!

Wow, you would judge me!
I take my DD out hats, gloves, coats and blankets. By the time we have reached anywhere gloves are off (thumb sucker) hat is nowhere to be seen and blanket is being used as a pillow. Yes I do try and put them back on her, she refuses. Yes I know she looks cold and I look like the worse mum ever. However when I am being told she looks cold I am actually thinking 'yh well least she has her socks still on' My dd enjoys rolling her leggings up to her knees too.
Please do not judge others. The tantrums I have had to endure to try and get a coat on her.

Hats on coat, woolly Hats, gloves, blankets, scarf, blankets, bigger coats, rain cover...

Surely children wouldn't kick off at all of these?

I would possibly say something.

Let's all go out of our way to shame parents to help them learn their lesson

It's about the child, not the parent. I should have remembered DD's coat that day. I didn't and deserved that comment. That sting of shame stayed with me, I don't think I've forgotten her coat since. The lady was well meaning- she was concerned for a small child. It was for DD's benefit not mine.

It's about making a judgement- I've often let my DD take her shoes and socks off in the buggy on cold days (to avoid the tantrums) but not in winter. If she refuses to keep them on when it's really cold we go straight home. Cold can be dangerous, a toddler doesn't know when their body temp is dangerously low or their feet are getting frost nipped. It also lowers their resistance to catching colds and bugs. So I think it's the parent's duty of care to keep them warm. Wellies and puddlesuit for rain, snowsuit/skiwear for snow/frost/ice/high wind chill.

Does it have to be seen as judging/interfering? Can't it be seen as concern/empathy/helping?

Zoop is right, it's not about the parent, it's about the child. It was a well meaning lady concerned for the child. But Zoop, why are you feeling shame? There's no need at all.

I would think most children by the age of two-ish understand about putting something on if they are cold so it depends really if they have no other clothes/blankets with them, which is a bit shit of the parent/carer or they do but just don’t want to bundle up or don’t feel the cold.

My child is quite small and slight (which somehow makes them look like they need more wrapping up) doesn’t feel the cold and hates having bulky stuff or several layers on. Would’ve asked for a blanket if cold in a pushchair though.

I'm sure there are genuine cases but the ones I've heard of came under the neglect category unfortunately. A lot of the time the parents were vulnerable and needed educated and common sense didn't prevail. Things did improve with the right support though.

I do agree there are busybodies that comment over petty things when really they shouldn't; everybody had their own way do doing things. However there are also situations where people really do need to comment and don't. Child or vulnerable adult welfare is everybody's responsibility and turning a blind eye and simply walking by can prove fatal in some cases.

has of

@elfieonshelfie yes, they really would. My DD is currently running around house with very little on. Why? Because she wants to. My DD would strip to nothing outside in these temperatures if I allowed her! Hats, gloves, coats, blankets, footmuff and rain covers are not impossible for a 1 year old to remove!
Kids like to feel free, winter clothes feel restrictive for little children so they will remove them!
Have you never seen a tired parent pushing their child around with one shoe and sock on. The reason why is because child has removed them and to get it back on would mean a tantrum, 5 minutes of success before DC happily removes it again.

Why are they busybodies! Can't they just be concerned and trying to help?

I think most people do come from a good place and one of concern yes. There are also however those that are more in the nosey interfering side of things. For instance commenting on a baby being inappropriately dressed for the season yes that's concern. Commenting on a colour the baby is wearing like oh I wouldn't put my baby boy in yellow for example that's when it crosses boundaries.

on

@PasstheStarmix I remember when my eldest was 6 months old I had her in some yellow dungarees. I don't feel I should repeat what somebody said to me. But the words were basically That dungsrees shouldn't be put on babies as they are for a different kind of child. I was sickened by the vile comment. The only reason I am not repeating actual words is because I just can not or do not want to upset parents or relatives in certain families. I have never wanted to punch someone so much!

Does it have to be seen as judging/interfering? Can't it be seen as concern/empathy/helping?

I know when someone is showing concern or wants to help out (and is being kind), and I know when it is someone just wanting to pass judgement, tut, eyeroll or make a fatuous comment (and is being an arse) - having a child with additional needs has honed my shitdar to a pretty fine degree.

*Skippykips
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My youngest doesn't like a hat or gloves but I manage to get a thick coat and blanket on her. My nephew runs outside with no clothes on but when he goes out he will wear a hat and scarf etc

As for seeing children with no shoes on I see this but I can't say I have seen children with no socks on in the winter an cold months.... I have seen a few baby's and I mean less than 6 months old with people with only jumpers on and they have have big coats on

And they been parents or people carrying them in big coats..

My one year old removes hats repeatedly and throws them on the ground, bites off gloves and kicks off any blankets. She can unzip her coat part of the way too, and does. I make sure she's wearing warm clothes if we're going to be out for a while but I can't stop every 3 seconds to replace her discarded winter gear so it eventually goes into my bag. My two year old loves to be wrapped up warm though. I suppose it only looks like I care about the eldest one?

I eldest although she is 7 would walk around with just her Tahiti on in this weather. My youngest would scream if I sent her out without her coat on. Just shows how different they all are

Sometimes it is genuinely colder out than you thought especially with wind chill. Or you are out longer than expected.
I think if you already feel your child is more difficult than others you are just going to feel worse from all the comments so not only do you have the child to deal with but also the people.
It sounds like there are lots of young kids like this. And that it is common for then to refuse all including blanket and raincover.
It may be that we are an in between country where it is not cold enough consistently to use winter clothes enough for them to get used to it.
People also drive quite a bit so kids are dressed for that ie no coat etc.
I dont think an adult in a wheelchair is comparable because they are older, circulation may not be as good, they are less likely to be getting up and down and walking. They can maybe plan and understand the consequences of not wearing certain clothes.
Ive got some good duffle coats from next as they have a toggle and zip and 2.5yo cannot undo the toggle!
Interesting how many SEN children run too hot.
My kids both have issues but like me run cold. I imagine it is exhausting the body to not be running optimally either way.
I found after giving birth when i had hyperthyroidism i was constantly hungry but loosing weight, couldnt sit down, always thinking and boiling hot and irritable. Amazing what hormones can do.

@skippykips that's sounds terrible. How cruel can people be! Their comments sound disgusting and they sound like the type of individuals that would look for anything to make vile comments about. I would have seriously have felt like punching them one and I'm not a violent person whatsoever....