SIL didn't buy present for her three month old niece as 'didn't see the point'

[ginfizzliz]

I kind of get it but I also think it's a bit rubbish as there are loads of things that our baby is getting interested in now and I loved buying gifts for my much adored niece and nephew (not hers she doesn't want children) when they were teeny tiny.

AIBU?

I didn't buy presents for my own 3 mo dds, let alone my sisters dds. Sorry.

Presume she bought lots of gifts when she was born. Not too long ago. I wouldnt care about this. By her first birthday she will be ready for lots. Wouldn't give it another thought.

My son was 6 weeks old on his first christmas, i wouldve been a bit gutted if people didnt buy him anything because there was no point it only costs a couple of quid for a rattle or something that lights up which they love at that age!

It's a bit stingy IMO.

There's no need to be quite so practical at Christmas.

There are lots of nice little gifts to get a 3-month-old. Considering the ranger of 'Babies first Christmas' stuff out there alone it's a little unimaginative to not see the point of getting anything at all.

I don’t generally keep books in my baking cupboard! And yes of course you can make homemade toys - we have a fine selection of shakers made from plastic bottles and rice/pasta etc. I’m just making the point that babies aren’t just little puddings that do nothing so actually there is a point to baby toys and books.

YABU
In a few years time when your DD has far too many toys, you'll think back fondly to the time when she didn't have so much. Your Sil is right, a 3 month old doesn't need anything for Christmas.

We didn't get ds anything for his first Christmas, when he was 4 months. In order to placate MIL we wrapped up some of the clothes and toys he ready had to open. He didn't need anything.

If Christmas was just about giving what everyone needed we would all be wrapping up bog roll and boxes of soap powder every year.

I always got a small inexpensive toy for my niece and nephews when they were babies.

To the pp who suggested getting 'Babies first Christmas' stuff, having single-use things given to us would have really stressed me out. Not everyone enjoys consumption for the sake of it - we didn’t get my DS anything for Christmas at that age as he already had more than enough of everything.

I guess ultimately I expected her to buy her a little gesture present as it kind of shows that she's excited rather than nonplussed at having a niece. Because sometimes she seems really not fussed which I think is a shame as I love love love being an aunt. She didn't get her a present when born either but weirdly that didn't really bother me!

And yeah she's my partner's sister so although she's not single I'd not expect her boyfriend to care enough to buy a present!

I told people not to buy for our 4 month old, as I don't see the point. But we have so much stuff already, and buy things constantly anyway.

What do you mean by a gesture present? If you mean buying something for the sake of it them imo that's wasteful and unnecessary, most 3 mth old's seem to have everythind they need, I don't see much point in getting something that the child doesn't even know about.

I can't remember but it wouldn't surprise i I didn't buy anything for my own nephews/neices on their first Christmas and I certainly have no clue if my siblings bought for my DC, I think you are overreacting tbh

Some people just aren't interested in children (and your SIL's childfree status should have been an indicator of that) and that's absolutely OK.

Sandy by gesture I mean that I would never expect anything expensive. I will never expect anything expensive as actually believe it or not I am really not a fan of lots and lots of pointless presents!

Plenty to buy a e3month old. I gave my baby niece money anyway but that’s because she is the younges t sibling and they don’t need#want any more baby toys

Because sometimes she seems really not fussed which I think is a shame as I love love love being an aunt.
You have already said that she doesn't want children so maybe she just isn't particularly interested in her own or other people's children. She might come around when your daughter is older, or maybe not. Don't project your experiences and expectations onto her.

Your silis is sensible. I Only got one present (fisher price cookie shape sorted) for my 6 month old last year and very limited for my 17 month thisyear. Yabu

Having some nice keepsakes of your child's first Christmas is not 'consumption for the sake of it'.

Both my sons love seeing theirs every year, as do I.

there's a school of thoughts that toys are very important for babies development even at 3 months old - shapes, colours, sounds etc

so YANBU it's very stingy not to buy something for a baby.

If someone doesn't feel it's necessary, they can always buy an item of clothing for later in the year, they grow up so quickly bigger clothes are always needed.

It's even worst if there are siblings: do people tell them a baby is not a real person yet, so doesn't deserve anything from Santa? All my kids had gifts for Christmas, and I was so grateful, they ended up playing with all their toys at one point or another.

It’s odd - I’ve a three month old DD and I’ve not bought her anything for New Year (our equivalent of Christmas), but I’d be a bit hurt if noone else did. No logic to it, except I suppose that I think about/care about/buy for her 24/7, whereas others don’t. I’d just like her thought about by others. A card would do, I think.

toys aren't particularly important to babies of this age, it is more about interactions with adults

My son was 3 month on his first Christmas and I think everything got him something - no, he didn't need anything but it was nice and thoughtful for people to consider him (and, seriously, how many of the children/adults we buy for every year NEED their presents, not many - I buy for a treat, not for necessity).

You can buy a 3 month old a lot of things. My 4 month old has got books teethers rattles clothes.