Aibu to next longer want to get married and to want the kids to have my name

[thiskittenbarks]

DP and me have been together 7 years. Known each other for almost 20 years. still no proposal. When we had been together a year he asked what type of engagement ring I'd like and I showed him some. We had no money then so I knew it wasn't really an option. But that was 6 years ago. When we decided to have a baby I said I'd only give baby his last name if we were going to get married. His response was that of course we were going to get married. We named baby his name and waited patiently for a proposal. Then I got less patient and we spoke about it and I was pretty upfront about how I felt - he's said we'd get married and I couldn't for the life of me understand what the fuck was taking him so long. We have a good amount of disposable income and he has significant savings that he keeps separate from our savings (I had presumed for a ring). I've said on numerous occasions I would be happy with a very inexpensive ring. I have showed him several rings that I like. DS is now 14 months and I'm am pregnant again. I know 3 couples who have got engaged within the last month who have known each other less time than we have had our DS. We have been on a few lovely holidays and each time I am sure he will do it and of course nothing. It was our anniversary last month and I was sure he was going to do it then. Since then I have just been absolutely furious with him.
I want to be with him. He's a wonderful person, and an amazing dad and partner. But I just do not want to get married or engaged to him anymore. I have so much anger and resentment about the issue that if he ever did propose I'd know I'd just tell him to fuck off. On our wedding day I'd just feel bitter.
Ambu in telling him I want the babies to have my name (or both our names) and that I no longer want to get married?

The reasons he says are bullshit excuses btw. There must be more.

When is your new baby due?

I believe you can only change your older child's surname if both of you agree?

But yes, tell him the new baby will have your surname. Both your names will be represented in your family and if you ever change your name for whatever reason, the younger child can have their name changed too. Tell him this week. You may get a lovely surprise on New Years Eve

I was wondering that too. You say you’re not financially at risk and even in 2019 your children will be young enough to make your wedding hard work for you. I’d normally be the first to advise marriage for your protection but that isn’t what you seem to need. From his point of view, why do you want to be married with a proposal and fuss, and given your finances is it a reasonable use of your time and money at the moment with your children thus young?