To think that no I am not a lucky girl

[Animalfarmfan]

So we are at the in-laws today doing Christmas. We have just opened our presents.
For some background 5 years ago dh brought himself a super duper piece of Tech for himself. I indicated that I would like one too. So he got together with the in-laws to get a cheaper version for me as my only Christmas present. Meanwhile he got loads of items off his list.
I personally don't like doing lists so I have had 4 years of vouchers or IOU for experiences that I have to arrange. Despite hinting very strongly for some nice jewellery. Ever mentioning the name if the store etc.
So this year my piece of tech is no longer functional. So dh has treated me to a high end replacement. I know I should be grateful and indeed SIL has been going on and on about how lucky I am. Yet it is the same piece of tech her dbro upgraded to just because earlier this year.
So yet again dh has a pile if gifts to open and me just one.
I know I should have said we'll actually I would like x for a present but this doesn't sit right with me.
It isn't about the money. My family exchange presents and they are only token gifts but at least there is some thought there. It just seems like dh wants the easy option each year.
So Aibu to think that whilst it is a great gift that I am not lucky as I only have exactly what dh has anyway and it hasn't required any real effort.

shit Christmas buttercup? Or just one too many festive tipples?

I am not deprived of money as such and have full access to the joint account. However, he would question a big spend a make a comment which us how this situation arise in the 1St place. I should have said well you have one already so why should I forego a present to get the same thing. Sadly I didn't so I suppose I am responsible.
I do think SIL us jealous. Bit if the piece of tech as her and her dp already have them. But I think she is jealous if the fact that I can work very part time self employed and study to update qualifications when she has to full nearly full time.
I have put up with constant digs about it not mattering if the school shut as I don't work. Calling me a lady if leisure as I can get a couple if hours downtime during the day around work. Study and all the housework, gardening ( obviously seasonal) etc. Dh gets his downtime in the evenings and weekends.

Animalfarmfan - I actually think it's very easy to slip into the position you find yourself in with regard to your DH buying himself tech "just because" and you getting it as a gift when you are the SAHP. Unless he's a massive arse (I'm sure he's not) I bet he would understand if you started saying, "actually, next time you upgrade, I'd like to upgrade too". One of two things will most likely happen - he'll curb his spending on tech (or whatever it is) or you'll be able to put aside budget for x2 the spending on things like that, and maybe you won't actually want the upgrade when it comes around but would prefer to spend it on something else. Though that still leaves him in control of spending decisions. Actually what DH and I do (and I'm sure others too) is work out a budget so that we have x amount from the joint account going into personal accounts each month for us to spend on whatever we like.

A while ago I took on a huge project and worked a lot of extra hours in a very stressy situation and got a big bonus as a result. I spent a significant proportion of that -much more than I allocated for myself - to buy him an expensive piece of kit for his hobby that I have no interest in "just because"... in that situation I would say he was "lucky" (and so would he) but in all other situations and with normal income/expenditure it's all equal from the communal pot, even though I earn more than him.

Unless it's a "special" birthday or something, birthday/Christmas gifts are actually pretty low cost and are more thoughtful (e.g. tickets for a gig/event or books you think they would like but wouldn't necessarily get for themselves or something) - if you did that it would shut your annoying SIL up as she'd only see an exchange of relatively low cost items.

I prefer smaller thoughtful gifts too. That is always how my family have done it.
In-laws have lists. Multiple items with various prices but up to £100 per item.
Think I will have to embrace the list