To not recognise Christmas on Mumsnet?

[Kikisxmas]

I love reading all of the Christmas threads but more than ever this year I can't relate to much of it. I'm not slating anyone's way of doing things btw, it just seems that the norm here is not what I know and experience in real life at all.

Some examples;

Not visiting family at Christmas- I don't know anybody who doesn't spend Christmas/part of Christmas with family or friends.

Minimal gifts for dc- it sometimes seems like a competition on here, who can spend the least/buy the least for their dc. There's definitely some snobbery about those of us who buy lots of presents and the assumption it's tat. I'm not including those who can't spend much here btw.

Christmas Eve boxes/elf on the shelf/stockings- Again I've seen so many posts, some pretty nasty derisive comments to those who participate.

Giving random essentials for Christmas- A mattress and a potty are the standout ones for me this year.

So is it just me!? Like I said I'm not bitching about those who do things differently, I understand some people aren't big on Christmas, don't like it for personal reasons, don't like the commercialism etc.

Not looking for a bunfight, just curious about how your Christmas is and if it fits the mn norm?

We don't visit family over christmas now. I'm a single parent who doesn't have much contact with my own siblings. My parents are dead. We did use to visit inlaws though.
Minimal christmas presents - always spent what I could on my kids. They're not getting many actual presents this year though, because they're adults that already have whatever they want.
Christmas eve boxes/elf on the shelf - don't even know what these are. Always did stockings though. (and probably will this year, even though my kids are adults).
As for christmas dinner, it will be a simple roast chicken/nut roast for me dinner. Noone in our family likes turkey or pigs in blankets. We mainly just eat normal food with a couple of extras. Can't stand feeling bloated so will just eat the normal amount.
Christmas in our house is very low key. If I lived on my own I wouldn't celebrate it at all.

I think it's the epitome of crass Christmas-related materialism

This is absolute nonsense when many people buy a cheapy elf and aside from that initial outlay (5 euro in my case) it's totally free. The fun comes from your own efforts.

I don’t spend Xmas with family as a) my parents are divorced and it’s too stressful to tell one of them I’m spending it with the other and b) I don’t really enjoy spending time with family tbh (partly because when they were together it was horrible).

Plus DP and I work for ourselves and work v hard and don’t have many breaks, and both of our industries only really quieten down at this time of year, so it’s just about the only time we get to have a break. We either go away or have a quiet few days just relaxing and watching Xmas telly at home.

It means I don’t need to bother with presents or making Xmas ‘magical’ or anything.i do tend to buy myself a present though; this year I’m treating myself/the household to an internet radio.

Christmas Eve presents...when did that start? I don't know anyone who gives gifts on Christmas Eve (unless it's instead of on Christmas Day so they can exchange gifts in person with people they won;t seeon the day) Christmas Eve boxes aren't extra gifts, they're the same traditions that many families have been partaking in for years, just some of us now place things in a box to be brought out. I made DS's last year for his first Christmas, and we'll bring the same box out every year. I think it's a reallly special thing to do. No I didn't do the box as a child, but I don't think that's a bad thing. I've enjoyed both carrying on my own childhood traditions, and starting new ones now I'm a mother myself. Not everyone who does a Christmas Eve box/Elf on the shelf is a materiallistic/scattercash nutcase.

Not that I have an issue with materiallistic/scattercash nutcases. It's Christmas, enjoy it however you see fit

Mind you I'm not a typical Christmas celebrator anyway. I'm childless/infertile and it makes me miserable. I've always had to work through it and never had time for the whole decorations/food malarkey. No room for a tree and the pets would wreck it. We go to DP's mum anyway and she makes more effort. DP (also childless) and me just don't see the point of making effort at home for just the two of us and we both work through most or all of it. It's not even a bah humbug thing as such..just makes sense to us. I'm such a spring/summer person... I'd rather have time off then.

When we had DS1 and a few years into parenting him we realised that the traditional christmas we'd been doing wasn't working because it just didn't work for him. DS1 has ASD and Christmas can be an overwhelming time, so we chose to do it to suit us.

We still have lots of time with friends, family and loved ones, we still have gifts and parties and fun. It's just different now; we don't traipse to parents and Grandparents homes all day, we invite them here. We don't go out for fancy dinners with friends every night because he needs down time. We don't give essentials as gifts; they're things we want not things we need. We just do 'our' christmas. I think most families do, it's just that social media means everyone has more insight and is faster to judge what others are doing to keep their families happy than they were twenty years ago.

I don't have family to spend Christmas with.

I'm working on xmas day which is unusual for me. But it's double time so I volunteered because I'll be home at 9pm - probably 8.30pm because I bet they'll let me go early because they are nice, so we can have an xmas dinner instead of lunch. I'm looking forward to it.

It will probably be quite jolly and boozy in the office but I insisted on an Addison Lee or black cab there and back - no public transport and I don't have a car and I'm not going to be fobbed off with an Uber. That was the only sticking point but it's been sorted.

Since marriage we've never spent xmas anywhere else but at home. Neither of us want to be spending our precious time on motorways.

I've never understood the competitive satsuma and a book token creed among some MNetters. Xmas is a time of acquisitiveness for children and there is nothing wrong with that.

I was counting up today after reading a tedious piece by Amanda Platell in the Daily Mail yesterday about some awful person on benefits who was spending loads of taxpayers' money on her teeming horde of offspring.

Amanda got two presents in her childhood. Poor her. We're about the same age and I used to get about eight presents from my parents in various sizes including a main present (once a bike but usually a reasonably expensive craft-type thing), board game, cuddly toy, two annuals, cheaper craft thing, pyjamas, festive box of Milk Tray with a picture of kittens or puppies on etc.

I felt a bit sorry for Amanda after that but not much. That's probably why she feels so bitter

Christmas Day here -
Visit my family at some point when they are free over Christmas hols
Open presents Christmas morning
Christmas dinner on Christmas Day round PILS
Party games at some point
Various relatives come and go during the day, some have lunch at home and come round later, etc or come round at nearest convienient date to Christmas as they like to have Christmas Day at home (no one minds or causes a fuss)
Children get toys for Christmas but also useful things like books and clothes
Boots 3 for 2 gifts are ok!
People get presents for others that they can afford (no one tots up that the have been given a £10 present but received a £20 present)

I live away from my family ,2 of my DCs not included.I only have my dad and sister and DHs parents as extended family so we do buy adult presents. I will be spending Christmas at home with DH and our local children and grandson.This weekend I went back home and DS will be coming down in the new year as they will be spending Christmas with my DiLs family.No bad feelings about that. We will not go to church as we aren't religious .We will eat well but not excessively,and drinks will be free flowing but we never fat drunk.

I'm sure other people will do their Christmas totally different but I don't judge them

I don't understand the animosity towards Christmas Eve boxes either, given that they're just a formalisation of what people always did on Christmas Eve (watch a film, read Christmassy books, have hot chocolate). New pjs for Christmas were a thing when I was a child in the 80s.

I'm going on holiday with dd and my Mum this year we used to go to my Grans but she died December last year so Mums treating us this year.

given that they're just a formalisation of what people always did on Christmas Eve (watch a film, read Christmassy books, have hot chocolate)

I think that might be the key - people kicking back at the formalisation, particularly when it gets turned into another thing that has to be bought. Five minutes on Facebook selling pages will give you loads of people hawking Christmas Eve boxes for £20+.

In the Hobbit house we love Christmas and do go overboard compared to lots of others (spend about £3-400 maybe more on each of us 4 kids & adults) and there could be 30+ gifts including small stocking items. What other people do doesn't worry me either.
We do a family secret santa on Christmas Eve and we have a Christmas eve tradition of our Elf on the shelf (not a Genuine Elf, a tesco soft toy eld) leaving new pj's for the kids under the tree. Christmas is at home in the morning then on the MIL for my lunch and my mum joins us. We eat far too much and play games before coming home to watch Dr Who and other TV specials. Boxing day is spent in pj's watching films amd eating buffet food & chocolate, Low key compared to lots but we enjoy it

There is no one right way of doing Christmas as long as you enjoy It that’s the main thing. My Muslim colleague told me they will celebrate the day as a holiday with extended family joining them for a Massive roast turkey cooked in a yogurt/spice marinade but there will be no presents for the anyone. A friend has been buying presents all year round and her kids will have heaps to open including essentials such as toothbrushes and face cloths. I personally only do a stocking and a couple of presents per person but I prioritise Christmas food and my pantry is bursting with goodies. I do like to spend time playing games and watching TV with the family and catching up with relatives I don’t see often.

Only got dd 19 her coming home on Friday from uni was the best present for me.

I don't understand the animosity towards Christmas Eve boxes either, given that they're just a formalisation of what people always did on Christmas Eve (watch a film, read Christmassy books, have hot chocolate). New pjs for Christmas were a thing when I was a child in the 80s

I had literally never heard of "Christmas Eve Boxes" until I read about them on here.

And I don't do and have never done any of those things on Christmas eve, either as a child or when my son was a child. New pyjamas are bought as and when required.

"Christmas eve box" sound twee and contrived- the Christmas marketing equivalent of "Ploughman's lunch".

TheHobbit your Christmas sounds perfect. I go overboard with presents for the dd’s, now they are getting older more of their presents are things that they need, they are getting clothes and I have just ordered electric toothbrushes, I have spent quite a bit but I love Christmas and I love seeing them open their presents. We do Christmas Eve boxes which seem to have more in them each year, I’m so excited about dd1 opening hers as I have got her a Cookie Monster onesie instead of pj’s. I have swapped stockings for a gift bag of small presents as I couldn’t fit things in the stocking, they probably have around 15 small gifts (mainly tiny things that cost £1-£5) and then they have at least 15 gifts under the tree.

We missed the boat with elf on the shelf, dd’s Are a bit too old for it now though dd1 has asked if we can do it.

Food is a huge part of Christmas, probably even more so this year as I have been trying to eat healthy all year, I can’t wait to pig out for a few days.

Also I should add that the Christmas Eve box we do is literally a box. Cardboard ... had it years... covered it in wrapping paper... pretty much free and easily replaced if accidentally sat on so no competitive accessory buying there

I'd never heard of Christmas eve boxes either until I read about them on here, asked dd did she want one and she said only if it's a clothes voucher the cheeky devil

No elf on the shelf for us bet we do get a Christmas eve delivery from the elves

We go bowling, crazy golf on Christmas Eve and then its DS choice for dinner (KFC). Then its home, he PJs on and Its a Wonderful Life

Christmas day we have family over for dinner, presents and game

I spend a lot but thoroughly enjoy it

I know people that don't do Santa and they are perfectly normal people with happy kids who are still excited to get presents on Christmas morning they just know that the presents come from their parents.

We do Santa. This year: We won't go to visit family but they come to us.
We'll go to church on Christmas eve.
We'll have late lunch on Christmas day - the main event.
Presents will be "appear" under the tree and be opened after the meal.
(This is how i had it growing up - not uk)
DC will get about 5 presents each (4 toys & 1 pyjamas/books) this includes presents from one side of grandparents.
No idea if this is considered too much?!?
I don't know anyone in real life who does Christmas eve box or elf on the shelf, we don't either.

We do crib service Christmas Eve followed by Christmas Eve box of pjs book and chocolate coins. We buy quite a few presents for DS usually a few for each other but this year limited to £50 and put money towards a great holiday. Presents for mum and dad and bil (no kids) and kids our side. On our own Christmas Day drive to my family Boxing Day and data’s in hotel overnight then drive 4hiurs to pil then stay there. Never heard of anyone with young kids in Santa denial (aka miserable gits) outside mumsnet until this year when one of DS classmates had been told by parents there’s no Santa. Apparently they aren’t celebrating as Muslim so told 5year old no Santa so no presents. Pissed me off all other Muslims I know givepresents/do Santa for kids and why go out your way to fuck up other people’s christmases just cos you’re a miserable sod.

I should say that although we spend Christmas with family we have a pretty small extended family, my dc are the youngest and the only little children now so I'm not having a big huge Christmas like you see on tv.

So our Christmas is usually a chilled Christmas Eve, dh usually works but isn't this year so I'll be able to go to church for Christmas Eve mass.

Christmas morning is stockings in our bed, dc open presents (me and dh don't really buy for each other as we can't really afford it), ring family/play with new toys/eat chocolate. I get the dinner on whilst our family arrives usually around 4 of them. Dinner, drinks, kick everyone out baths, pyjamas and relax!

We always had new pyjamas on Christmas Eve when I was a child and I've kept that going. Makes the photos of Christmas morning look nicer.