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Original poster

Phone conversations on maternity wards

206 replies

user1494667160 · 16/12/2017 07:13

It is 7am and the woman in the next hospital bay has been on the phone for the last half hour.
She is doing my head in.
It is a maternity ward so only gave birth yesterday. Absolutely shattered from babies waking up all night (completely reasonable as that is what being on a maternity ward is all about).
But being on your phone and having lengthy conversations at 7am is taking the mick.
I finally drifted off at 6am and woke up to her chatting away loudly.
She is speaking another language as well which means what she is saying to me sounds just like an extra noise!
Raaaaa

OP posts:
silkpyjamasallday · 16/12/2017 19:56

This is why I discharged myself after less than 24 hours, much to the midwives disapproval. My bed was directly below the machine that made the noise to alert the midwives to anyone in the room pressing the buzzer, I couldn't deal with another moment of listening to chatting, snoring, watching tv on iPads without headphones and on top of that people pressing the buzzers over and over because their baby was crying, and proceeding to ask the midwives what to do, I wanted to scream at them to use some common sense. I got zero help with breastfeeding or anything else during the night because of the incessant buzzer pressers I was put in with taking up the midwives time because they couldn't be arsed to use their brains. Didn't help that it was the hottest day of the year and was pushing 30 degrees on the ward. I still feel the rage now.

StrugglingAlbion · 16/12/2017 20:16

I had DD2 five months ago. Elective c section.

My local hospital has recently had its maternity unit all done up. It is lovely. Fresh and clean.

I was fortunate enough that there was only one other girl on the post natal ward. She was nice enough. However, it was the midwives that were the issue. As lovely as they were, they would shout to each other down the corridors at 2am. "34 needs another sheet! Can you bring one up?" Etc etc.

CherryChasingDotMuncher · 16/12/2017 21:11

Lol at people tying to subtlety hint the OP is racist because she thinks another language is more like noise. I don't think the internet is for you if you can't handle the difference of opinion. BTW OP I totally agree about the language thing. If you understand it it's easy for it to just be background noise.

Postnatal wards are like the seventh circle of hell, it always amazes me when people say they think men should also be allowed to stay overnight when the patients themselves behave so badly! I'm lucky that for both my kids the hospital only had 2 x 1 hour visiting slots and rules on talking on phones at certain times. I thought that the 12 hour partner visiting slot (with no breaks) was far too long though. The husband of the lady next to me used to shove his chair into my cubicle (despite my curtain always being drawn) that I could have reached out and touched his head. He would be there the entire 12 hours, in that sodding chair. Which was fun when talking about bleeding, pooing and my 4th degree tear at all hours of the day.

Bobbiepin · 16/12/2017 22:25

Wow, reading some of these has made me so sad. Aside from snore-y mcdick I had a wonderful experience in post natal. The midwives and HCPs were wonderful and so caring. All gave me a big hug when they finished shift and when we went home. I got excellent support with breastfeeding, especially from the student who stayed chatting with me for an hour to help distract from the pain and get the latch right.

The NHS is truely wonderful sometimes, I'm sorry you all had such negative experiences.

jlbcredit · 16/12/2017 23:00

Late night, I'd been up for two days straight in labour etc, woman opposite was on the phone to her mum about her bins for what seemed like hours. BINS. I was in tears as was all over the place and just needed to grab any bit of rest I could.

Really hoping I can pay for a private ward or something this time round.

Madsy1990 · 17/12/2017 17:30

Was she talking excessively loudly? That is annoying. I remember it well. Last time i was on a maternity ward, the woman in the next bay bellowed down her phone for the majority of the time. I remember she decided to open a big sharer bag of Doritos at 3 am and proceed to scoff the lot...noisily. I wanted to punch her.

Someonessnackbitch · 17/12/2017 17:35

Let’s be honest when you’ve just had a baby EVERYTHING pisses you off. I was moaning to myself about everything. But 7am is not early. When you have just given birth time is just a blur. Someone who has just given birth at midday may feel like it’s 3am.

windygallows · 17/12/2017 17:35

God I sympathize OP. The last time I was in a ward overnight (for an operation) the other 3 women in the ward had been in for a long time, knew each other and chatted loudly all fucking night.

I kept shusshing them and when I finally asked the nurse if she would ask them to be quiet she said 'that's not her job'. I get it a nurse probably shouldn't be spending her time telling people to keep noise down especially when they have better things to do (and could possibly face abuse in response) but I do think the problem is that these wards are essentially 'unpoliced' when it comes to behaviour so bad behaviour prevails.

PolarBearkshire · 17/12/2017 17:37

You can pay privately and stay in private room so "other languages" dont disturb you....its a ward for everyone maybe she is suffering distressed maybe she has no home to through.., people can have issues even if they have just delivered a baby...

Pals87 · 17/12/2017 17:40

Would someone swearing in English be more bearble then?

Comeon, OP , giving birth is not easy
mums are either grumpy or emotional.
Why don’t you get a pair of earphones with some soothing music it will help you drift into sound sleep.

Stay positive Congratulations BTW

Thisworldsnofun · 17/12/2017 17:42

I was kept in for a week and one night the woman in the next bed was jabbering away on her phone. It was 4am. I hobbled (c section) down to the nurses station and told them if they didn't shut her up I was going to suffocate her. Looking back I realise I was a little hormonal but I have no regrets!

reiki73 · 17/12/2017 17:46

I had a very similar situation on the post natal ward after my daughter was born. She was in SCBU, and I was moved to this particular ward. This woman was talking very loudly on her mobile in her cubicle, so the ward nurse came in and dealt with it promptly as she was told that her voice was loud enough to be heard overcast the nurses station and it was unfair to the other women on the ward trying to rest. Basically the nurse followed up the queries that the woman had been on her phone about and fed back to her. Totally sympathise, if you flag it up then a good nurse should sort it out with whoever's being a nuisance.

jessebuni · 17/12/2017 18:04

If I were you I would just ask her to please keep it down but politely because you don’t know who she is talking to or why. I spent a bit of time in hospitals as a child due to some health problems. So am terrified of hospitals. With my first baby I wanted to have him at a midwife led birthing centre but was told he couldn’t because he was too big (apparently) anyway. I gave birth at 00.07am. I was sent to get showered and then to the ward and DH was sent home before 1am! I was in floods of tears. I was terrified. I couldn’t sleep and didn’t all night. I WISH we had been allowed to make phone calls on the ward to calm me down but no one was allowed they had to go outside which I obviously couldn’t do in a nightie in the middle of the night with a baby only hours old. Things were even worse in the morning when they took DS away because he couldn’t breathe and no one was telling me anything (I know they were more concerned with DS but surely they could spare five minutes to send one person to just explain the situation to a screaming mother). I couldn’t call anyone or do anything. Worst experience of my life. I then had to spend the next two days on the ward without my baby with a load of mother’s and their screaming babies including the ones snoring through their babies crying. I hated every single one of them. At last DH and FIL lost their tempers with the staff and got me moved to a room on my own for my own sanity. Even then they had the wrong chart in the end of my bed and wrote stupid observations like “Jessica is upset” no shit, my baby is attached to machines three floors away and no one will discharge me from the ward so that I can go down and see him. Maternity wards are generally crappy is my point...kinda went off on a rant then sorry.

My next birth was done at home. I actually highly recommend it. So relaxed and calm and I got to sleep in my own bed and sit on my own sofa eating a mars bar etc afterwards and because I was relaxed DD was relaxed.

JaneEyre70 · 17/12/2017 18:06

My eldest DD had to stay in with her 2nd baby, and was beyond it after a night in there. She discharged herself rather than stay a 2nd night, and had some issues with blood loss but said there was no way she was going back in. I think we've lost sight of new mums needing rest, quiet and limited visiting.
When I had mine, partners were allowed from 9am to 9pm, visitors were allowed between 4 - 5 pm in the visiting lounge not bays, and it was lovely. I felt very protected by the midwives, established feeding well and was able to sleep at night on quiet 4 bed bays.

Mummymiller85 · 17/12/2017 18:08

I had similar when I was in after having my youngest DD. She was up until the early hours chatting away. When her visitors came in later in she told them she hardly slept because of "all the noises the babies were making"!!

PeppaPigTastesLikeBacon · 17/12/2017 18:09

A woman in the mat ward had her god damn tv playing (without headphones) for 2 bloody days. It was awful!

Congratulations on your baby. Hope you get out soon

StefMay · 17/12/2017 18:10

Thisworldsnofun
Sounds familiar. I'd just been taken to ward at 10.30pm from delivery and needed to sleep after 2 days being induced. I was going to be woken every 4 hrs for baby diabetes and I'm hypothyroid bloods/feeds- so generally a tired, whiny, woman.

Mum in next bed on phone from my arrival until 11.45pm when I buzzed the nurse (still had epidural legs!) and told her that she "must make her stop or I will kill her" :)

passemoilevin · 17/12/2017 18:11

I've been pissed off for 3 years ever since I was discharged 2 hours after the birth of my PFB aged 21. Reading these stories, I'm bloody relieved!

KimchiLaLa · 17/12/2017 18:12

I had a woman in the bay next to me who Facetimed her other kids at 6.30 am while other babies and parents were sleeping (obviously not all of us). Her kids were screaming and It was LOUD. Those awake kept looking at each other like WTF? It was just rude and disrespectful.

stopfuckingshoutingatme · 17/12/2017 18:18

I read on here to take floor wipes and wet wipes in and by god I am glad I did

It was the same in a the visitors toilets when my dad was in ICU . I took in floor wipes and an air freshener there too

I don’t understand why the staff are so lenient on visitors . Probably too scared

When we need more security guards in hospitals it’s a sad day Sad

stopfuckingshoutingatme · 17/12/2017 18:18

And ear plugs are essential !!!

Sallystyle · 17/12/2017 18:19

I only had to stay in with one of mine for the night.

I was home with the other four in four hours. I am very glad because hospital wards are just so shit. I worked in a hospital as an HCA and there really is no such thing as peace and rest.

smilingontheinside · 17/12/2017 18:21

I think @Lolita is a wind up merchant and male Hmm

bestthings · 17/12/2017 18:23

lolita you sound a barrel of laughs. God help anyone that'd come to you wanting a bit of sympathy and understanding. You'd pounce on them like a ton of bricks if they didn't pick their words ever so carefully. Shock

Original poster
user1494667160 · 17/12/2017 18:23

I can't afford to pay for a private room.
I don't why you are trying to make it a language problem 'polar bear'.
I was just stating that because it's another language it is harder as it's just more noise as your brain can't process it.
I have been here 3 days as I've had recovery complications.
The staff are amazing here it.
It's just other people that are not considerate of others.
The lady next to me is sick all night, her baby cries all the time and I feel really sorry for her. She can't help it. Noises like that are not a problem. She is sick and we are all in the same boat trying to get better.
It's the really noisy tvs and endless telephone conversations people have in the middle of the night that is wrong.
For the record the lady on sat morning was talking to her husband who lives 10 mins up the road. Just because she was speaking a foreign language it doesn't necessarily mean she was speaking to someone else in another country in another time zone. She was talking loudly since half 6 that morning.
I eventually asked to be quiet and she put phone down. Her husband came later that day and they both spoke loudly together for 5 hours.

OP posts: