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Original poster

To feel like resigning to avoid a horrible team building event

405 replies

evilharpy · 13/12/2017 19:11

It's been announced that my team (of about 15, all of whom I like but most of whom I don't know very well at all) is being sent to a team building event at the end of February. It's three days. Residential. Outdoor physical stuff. In February. It will be wet and freezing. We will have to share rooms. I hate the outdoors, especially when it's wet and freezing. I hate physical stuff unless it's a nice gym-based class. I will have to buy suitable outdoor clothes. And most of all I hate hate hate sharing rooms even with very close friends and will be desperately uncomfortable and miserable the entire time. The only way it could possibly be worse is if it involved camping.

I won't actually resign obviously (for one thing my notice period is longer than the end of Feb) but I will probably worry about it every single day until it's over.

Has anyone been on anything similar and can either confirm that it will be miserable or convince me that it might actually be fun?

OP posts:
Nyx1 · 14/12/2017 18:18

Cotton "You get to do this in work time?"

well I doubt the OP works 72 hours in a row...! (Sharing bedrooms with colleagues isn't just an invasion of privacy, it puts you "on duty" in my book).

OP already said upthread that she reacted with horror when she was told so to look enthusiastic, then feign illness, will be difficult now.

TheFickleFingerOfFate · 14/12/2017 18:24

Concussion. You tell the doc you tripped and hit your head and he'll sign you off for a week. I discovered this by accident when I tripped and hit my head off the wallof the living room. I remember all that. I don't remember the next 3 hours until I 'woke up' in the middle of the town....

user1485778793 · 14/12/2017 18:34

D&v! No one will want to go near you never mind share a room, pretend your 'coming round' to the idea 'can see the benefit to the team now's blah blah blah.... Let other people whine..... then d&v day before, you're sorted

ForalltheSaints · 14/12/2017 18:35

Do not resign. Get a doctor's note if you can, or even self-certify to avoid going. It is too stressful for you.

If you have a doctors note you can offer to remain in the office as cover or just doing normal work. Probably being denied privacy which sharing a room entails could be covered under human rights clauses or something similar, but I would suggest not using that if you can.

user1485778793 · 14/12/2017 18:39

I was once asked to go to a trade show for 4 days and I'd have to share a room with a male colleague, I said I wasn't comfortable doing that so they sacked me ( I was agency staff and was conveniently not right for the company lol)

manicmij · 14/12/2017 18:56

Horrible. Just because you work together doesn't mean you have to sleep together. Can you offer to pay the additional cost for a separate room?

Booboo66 · 14/12/2017 18:58

You can still salvage the letting slip you hate the idea. You have plenty time to ‘come round to the idea’ but the vomiting bugs are full swing in February so it will be with great sadness that you have to pass when you are cruelly struck down the day before!

DagenhamRoundhouse · 14/12/2017 19:03

Surprised there's still companies that can afford these crap so-called team building exercises. Total waste of time.

SemolinaSilkpaws · 14/12/2017 19:05

Just say ‘these dates do not work for me, it is not convenient’.

Otherwise if you have the courage, stop wearing deoderant and washing for the forseeable future. No-one will want to share a room with you! Bit extreme though.

crunchymint · 14/12/2017 19:13

This all depends on whether you have to go. That will depend on your contract.

luckylorca · 14/12/2017 19:27

Hmmmm... I think I would have a sudden, unexpected death in the family.... onevthat you're really far too upset to talk about - but need 4 days off (to fly to the funeral and help with the prep beforehand/fall-out after ie sorting clothes/taking things to charity shops etc - not that they would dare ask)....

Polarbearflavour · 14/12/2017 19:28

I’m sure many people have invisible disibilities or women in the early stages of pregnancy who don’t wish to disclose it yet. They can’t force you to do physical activities, it’s not the military.

Blu99 · 14/12/2017 19:44

You need to make up an occasion that conflicts with the time of this team building hell.

“My best friend has just announced she’s getting married in Feb”

“My partner has booked a surprise holiday”

Etc

Sweetpea55 · 14/12/2017 19:50

This is my idea of hell. Is it planned for a weekend?

theSnuffster · 14/12/2017 20:03

I'd want to resign to avoid this sort of shit too. Sounds like my worst nightmare.

Nyx1 · 14/12/2017 20:33

Manic "Can you offer to pay the additional cost for a separate room?"

Why should she?!

LassWiTheDelicateAir · 14/12/2017 20:36

I will have to buy suitable outdoor clothes.

I hate the great outdoors. I don't own any "outdoor clothes". If I were forced to do this I'd have to buy clothes , which for me, would be hideous, useless and which I would never wear again.

josbd · 14/12/2017 21:14

If this were an outdoor sport at school, I am pretty sure it would be considered unfair on those who are not good at such things...!

thebeerfear · 14/12/2017 22:50

Waving at @pog100

Isn't there a single person here who has enjoyed weekends in bunkhouses, walking in hills, sharing meals, getting cold and laughing about it later?

Me!!! I'm shocked at the outrage on this thread too - no one I've ever worked with has ever had a negative reaction to these types of activities!

And all the people saying they won't stay overnight for work - eh???? I've never done a job where I didn't at some point have to stay away somewhere Hmm

SherbrookeFosterer · 14/12/2017 23:18

These events always sound worse then they actually are.

Just go with it.

Treat yourself to a nice weekend afterwards, even if it's just Champneys, to make up for it and give you something to look forward to!

IrkThePurist · 14/12/2017 23:28

How can people just go with it when they have kids? Or a disability, or a dodgy knee?
This type of event is in breach of the Equality Act. If an employer discriminated against anyone for refusing to participate they could find themselves in legal trouble.

He11y · 14/12/2017 23:40

I’d rather stick hot pins in my eyes! YANBU

LassWiTheDelicateAir · 14/12/2017 23:51

Isn't there a single person here who has enjoyed weekends in bunkhouses, walking in hills, sharing meals, getting cold and laughing about it later?

I have never stayed in a bunk house and have no intention of doing. Hills are much of a muchness- seen one- seen them all. What is enjoyable about getting cold?

And all the people saying they won't stay overnight for work - eh???? I've never done a job where I didn't at some point have to stay away somewhere

Er, yes. In a hotel in my own room. That is a ridiculous comment. That is not what the OP is objecting to.

This type of event is in breach of the Equality Act. If an employer discriminated against anyone for refusing to participate they could find themselves in legal trouble.

Indeed it is.

Cindie943811A · 15/12/2017 00:38

I got out of staying overnight because of disabilities and commuted everyday. I get that it is some distance away OP but is there somewhere relatively close you could stay?

HelpTheTigers · 15/12/2017 01:19

OP, don't you have some zombie sleep walking and strangling problem, that would endanger the life of any roommate?

Some people are even nutty enough to pay a small fortune for the privilege of extreme misery / having a good time, depending upon your view of this type of boot-camp.
Your post has also taken me down memory lane. Ex-H ran off with a colleague who he met on an outdoorsy week of team building. I am eternally grateful for that event!
Good luck with getting out of it, you might find that you aren't the only one who's dreading the prospect especially as it lasts for a few days. Not many people are in a position to be able to drop everything and join in The Fun.
Tbh, I would really like to do this apart from the room share aspect!