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AIBU?

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Original poster

113 women killed by men in the UK in 2016, 78 of them by their current/ex-partner [possibly triggering]

64 replies

CaveMum · 10/12/2017 08:03

Not an AIBU, but posting for traffic.

Statistics released today show:

113 women were killed by men in England, Wales & Northern Ireland in 2016

100 of them were killed by someone they knew

78 of them were killed by their current/ex-partner

More than three-quarters of those women killed by their former partner died within the first year of separating from them.

Full article from BBC: www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-42270719

“The Femicide Census says the total number of killings of women by men in 2016 is thought to be higher than the 113 it recorded because a number of cases are still under investigation and police forces did not provide some details to its freedom of information requests.”

OP posts:
sagamartha · 10/12/2017 14:55

Signed and shared.

The person who came and talked to us was explaining about the link between the World Cup and DV. Incidents go up massively during the World Cup - which is next year.

Funnyface1 · 10/12/2017 16:09

I've never had anything to do with this topic or known a violent man, but I'm astonished at the lack of help there is. And yet they want to cut back further? The idea that at risk women and children will have to be turned away when they desperately need help is heartbreaking.

Original poster
CaveMum · 10/12/2017 16:54

Bumping.

OP posts:
Whoyagonna · 10/12/2017 17:04

The scariest thing from your OP for me is this:

More than three-quarters of those women killed by their former partner died within the first year of separating from them.

They are not joking when they say you're most at danger when leaving them.

BahBumHug · 10/12/2017 17:23

Thanks CaveMum my mum’s always found it hard as she honestly had no clue it was happening. My aunt hid it from her as she was so worried what her sister would think Sad. From talking to other women this stigma is still very much alive and kicking; this is just one of the hurdles we need to overcome.

Signed and shared the petition and will keep pushing.

Original poster
CaveMum · 10/12/2017 17:39

You are right Whoyagonna, looking at th figures in more depth:

Of the 31 women killed within a year of separating:

32.3% were killed within the first month

19.4% were killed in months 1-3

16.1% were killed in months 3-6

9.7% were killed in months 6-12

OP posts:
Whoyagonna · 10/12/2017 17:44

Shouldn't be reading these stats when I've just left a previously abusive relationship.

Whoyagonna · 10/12/2017 17:48

When he's recently started on cocaine and still has keys to my flat! Yup. Need to get those back fairly lively.

deckoff · 10/12/2017 17:49

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

JulietNeverMetRomeo · 10/12/2017 17:51

These statistics and stories are heartbreaking. Stranger danger is taught everywhere but in actual fact that's not where we should be focusing on, it's the people we know and love.

I've signed the petition.

Original poster
CaveMum · 10/12/2017 17:53

I’m sorry Whoyagonna, please do get the locks changed ASAP. Have you reported his abuse to the Police? You could ask about getting a priority tag on your phone number and address.

OP posts:
Pumperthepumper · 10/12/2017 18:00

I think change the locks ‘whoyagonna’, I hope you’re ok flowers]

Pumperthepumper · 10/12/2017 18:00
Flowers
Whoyagonna · 10/12/2017 18:01

Oh priority tag already here on this address.

Whoyagonna · 10/12/2017 18:03

Can't afford to change locks right now, might look at getting a key chain, though he'd probably break through that. He has broken through locked doors before.

Whoyagonna · 10/12/2017 18:06

Council are supposedly changing the whole door system (last month?) and giving us all new keys and a cctv system. No sign of those works starting this side of Christmas though. Can't lock the blooming door from the inside once he has a key though. Maybe just one of those sort of those slide over things? Unsightly, but I might sleep better!

Pumperthepumper · 10/12/2017 18:09

Can you leave a key in the lock and jam the letterbox shut? Or put sellotape over the key so it can’t be pushed out?

Whoyagonna · 10/12/2017 18:10

I don't know. I'd need someone to test from the outside. I don't know anyone here.

Whoyagonna · 10/12/2017 18:11

Hang on, I'll check it out with the door open!

deckoff · 10/12/2017 18:13

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Whoyagonna · 10/12/2017 18:14

Ok, well that doesn't work. Key on inside, key on outside can still open it.
Ach, it's unlikely to happen. More likely to get hit by a bus.

Whoyagonna · 10/12/2017 18:17

Honestly, if he has a key and was in a temper, hell or high water wouldn't stop him. Hopefully council will update doors soon.

Pumperthepumper · 10/12/2017 18:20

I hope so too Who, maybe give them a phone and chase them?

Whoyagonna · 10/12/2017 18:23

Yeah, I'm sure the letter said the works were to be completed in November. Probably leaving it to January now.

passmethewineplease · 10/12/2017 18:27

Just unbelivably heartbreaking.

There was a docu on more 4 last night about Natalie Hemming, she was killed whilst her babies slept upstairs. Couldn't stop crying.

I'm just waiting on someone to pop up on this thread and say what about the men though.. Sad