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AIBU?

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Original poster

Anyone remember the Flexi-time CF?

885 replies

Abouttoblow · 09/12/2017 20:12

Thought I'd heard the last of her but unfortunately not. Colleague who left her job due to cheeky fuckery with her flexi-time for those of you who missed the first instalment.

I'm moving between fuming, embarrassed and incredulous at the moment. I've also laughed but I think that's shock more than anything Smile
DH and I were out for the afternoon at a Christmas market. Had a lovely day and stopped at an coffee shop with tables outside before coming home.
We'd been there about 10 minutes when I noticed a group of ladies in their 60's a few tables away and one of them was staring straight at me. I didn't recognise her and carried on with chatting with DH. I noticed her again when all her friends started turning round to have a look. I didn't know any of them.
I'm starting to think she may be someone I'd been in contact with in a work capacity as she is looking quite angry. As I said in the original thread I work with children/families and I have been approached by people previously who have been angry and upset. Only a couple of times though.
I continue to ignore it and we're getting ready to leave. DH goes inside to pay and use the loo and the minute he does this lady gets up and comes over, with her takeaway coffee cup in her hand. I can tell by her face it's not going to be a pleasant chat.
She asks if I'm pleased with myself and I say "I'm sorry, I don't know who you are". She says she's FTCF's mother and who do I think I am to refuse her daughter a reference! Do I realise I've ruined her career and I should be ashamed of myself. Everyone is looking now and I don't want to get into it so I just say she really doesn't have all the information.
She then takes the lid off her coffee and empties it into my fucking handbag on the table and walks off!!!!
I'm absolutely gobsmacked Shock
I'm home now and want to call FTCF and give her a mouthful but DH is trying to talk me out of it.
Maybe I should just have a large G&T Gin

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/3023633-To-make-an-official-complaint-about-colleague

OP posts:
MyBrilliantDisguise · 09/12/2017 22:26

Would her mum have seen you on her daughter's FB?

Her daughter is a really crap criminal, isn't she?!

Original poster
Abouttoblow · 09/12/2017 22:26

DH has gone down to the local station. I know they will have more important things to deal with on a Saturday night but at least it will be on record for now.
We thought I was too upset had a tad too much gin to do it myself Grin
They'll maybe come and speak to me tomorrow.

OP posts:
Makingahome · 09/12/2017 22:28

Remember your old thread. Awful situation. Do report.

ItsNachoCheese · 09/12/2017 22:29

abouttoblow i have just caught up on your other thread and you are a legend! Ftct is a top class idiot Xmas Grin

expatinscotland · 09/12/2017 22:30

Glad you are reporting. People like this need to be taught the hard way to have boundaries.

AnneLovesGilbert · 09/12/2017 22:31
Shock

The batshit message she sent you is really scary. Hope police can help OP. The pair of them need a talking to to stop things escalating further. You poor thing, what a horrible experience.

MiddleClassProblem · 09/12/2017 22:31

Now with the text too it really sounds like a harassment case building. I hope they back off pronto. How bloody awful! What a pair!

Nannyplumssillyoldelf · 09/12/2017 22:34

You can see where she gets her manners from.

Blatherskite · 09/12/2017 22:35

Reporting it is definitely the right move. They're deluded!

EBearhug · 09/12/2017 22:36

I remember the first thread and assumed that would have been the end of it - as no doubt did everyone. Some people are determined to hold a grudge and blame everyone else, it seems.

RockinHippy · 09/12/2017 22:36

So glad it's getting reported. I'm not surprised that you are shook up, the CF mother assaulted you! Followed up by barking mad texts from the CF. Be kind to yourself tonighthave another gin

Puzzledandpissedoff · 09/12/2017 22:36

I can't believe how she is so completely unaware of how entitled she behaves!

I can Hmm As a (retired) employer myself, I know just how many struggle with the word "no" ... it's just that some react more badly than others

Obviously you're doing the right thing in reporting this, OP; I only wonder how those who accused you of jealousy and sticking your nose in where it wasn't wanted will feel if they read this

Munrow · 09/12/2017 22:42

Take action. Have it recorded.

Thats terrible behaviour! Aggressive and bullying.

Without them being taught that there will be consequences for their actions, there is a likely chance they will continue their ill behaviour towards you.

This way, you have it logged at the very least and should they do horrible things again, continue to log it.

It'll stop them in their tracks and make them think twice before they decide to pull another trick like that.

I had the same with my in laws who thought it was acceptable to be physically aggressive around me every time I disagreed with them or stood up for myself.

Finally had enough and just reported them for harassment when they tried it again. Saved all bullying messages. I haven't heard from them since. Don't feel scared anymore either.

You're doing the right thing. Sorry for your ordeal.

kaytee87 · 09/12/2017 22:52

Wow her and her mum are off their rockers. I hope the police take it seriously. WineThanks

RandomMess · 09/12/2017 22:55

Shockthey are both utterly unhinged!!!! So glad you are reporting it.

HollaHolla · 09/12/2017 22:59

Keep records of EVERYTHING!

FlashTheSloth · 09/12/2017 23:01

Bloody hell! I remember your previous thread. I would have felt serious threatened that she was going to pour the coffee over me in that situation, perhaps something to mention to the police? Would be an appropriate response to someone who was stood having a go at you then took the lid off their coffee.

WTF has the twatty mother told her equally twatty daughter?! I'd probably reply to find out tbh.

blackteasplease · 09/12/2017 23:05

It is criminal damage even if it is just stained or even if the damage is only temporary.

A common example is over night prisoners smearing shit on cell walls. It cleans off but it's still criminal damage.

UtahGirl12 · 09/12/2017 23:07

Absolutely bat shit crazy! The pair of them. So sorry you had to encounter this. There are some crazily unhinged people out there.

Original poster
Abouttoblow · 09/12/2017 23:10

DH said police were really nice about it and community officer at the market had already recorded it.
They're going to pop round tomorrow to get all the details. I don't know where either of them live so don't know how they take that forward.
On the plus side lovely DH suggested we go out after they've been to get a new handbag Smile
Thanks for all the support lovelies and, believe me, I know there's a lot worse things happening out there but it really has upset me.
I'll update you tomorrow.

OP posts:
Katyazamo · 09/12/2017 23:11

I am really angry on your behalf this happened to you! Must have been so intimidating!

However I'm pleased as I never read your original thread and it was brilliant! I'm sure her mum doesn't know the full story - though she must be on glue to do that to you!

GrapesAreMyJam · 09/12/2017 23:12

This reply has been deleted

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ at the poster's request.

MrsMozart · 09/12/2017 23:13

Bloody hell. There are some barking mad CFs in this world.

I hope it calms down OP.

KeepServingTheDrinks · 09/12/2017 23:15

I remember your last thread very well (I think I posted on it). I was so pleased by the resolution back then.

What's happened today it totally horrible. I'm so glad the coffee shop contacted your DH and are being witnesses. And v glad it's being reported.

Whatever you do, don't respond to the text message (unless it's a "please do not contact me again" message). But do keep it because it demonstrates (together with today's assault) that this family are targetting you.

Oxcheeks · 09/12/2017 23:16

You definitely need to report this, you have CCTV evidence of her mothers attack on you and then the completely weird text message from ex-colleague alledging that you upset her mother and therefore ex-colleague and her kids???? Totally bat shit both of them in my opinion 🙄

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