never been invited to my sons house.

[pinky12]

My son lived on his own fro 3 years before he got married and i use to see him regularly, and visit his flat, now he has been married 15 months i have not been to his place once, even though his wife and him come to see us regularly to have dinner at home or in a restaurant, and they are both happy for me and my husband to fork out on expensive gifts for them including holidays. Her parents live some distance away but they visit them often, what have i done wrong.

Lots of you saying your MIL is a nightmare, I'm sure your own mother is perfect

Mine is. She tells me so, all the time. 😄

Lots of you say your Mil is a nightmareetc

My first mil was an absolute bitch!

To be honest, there's a reason you don't feel comfortable just popping round to your son's house - the dynamic has changed. It's a shared home. You call before you visit to make sure it's convenient. If you want to visit you ask and then there should be no issue.

Don't buy presents to expect something in return either. And I can't stand parents or in-laws who comment on the amount their child sees the other set of parents in law. It's nothing to do with you. Reach out to your child in a non confrontational manner.

I don't invite my in laws over. It's because for me it's normal to see parents about 3 times a year. I did this for 20 years with my parents before i met my DH, and have continued since. For my in laws is normal to see their kids about one a fortnight. For me this is far far too much. But I appreciate a different family has a different dynamic. I already see my in laws every few weeks, i cannot envisage every wanting to see them more, even though they are nice people. I would just rather be with DH and kids.

My parents will often message and say is it ok to pop over (they live 10min drive away) I'm currently on mat leave and 9 times out of 10 I say yes if we're in. I have a small baby and toddler and the house often looks like a tip but it's my parents. They don't judge me, they want to come around and see me and their grandkids.

My in laws live the same distance away, they never message me and if they were to come over I'd have to spend 3 hours cleaning for my snooty mother in law. Conversation is awkward therefore I'd never seek out their company. We usually pop around to my in laws about once every 6 weeks when my husband is with me, it means I don't have to scrub the house like a psycho and we can leave when we want to. My husband doesn't invite them over or visit them himself either.

I don't think my son has ever invited me to his house or that I have ever invited him to mine. I just go and visit when I want to and he just comes to mine anytime.
No need for an invite within a family.