To cancel the traditional sugar fest at Brownies.

[SoddingSoda]

I started volunteering at a Brownie unit around a year ago after moving back to the area. I absolutely love the girls and how enthusiastic they are, and also the other fellow leader/parent helpers are fantastic. In the summer term I took over the unit as the leader in charge stepped down due to family commitments but still continues to attend most weeks.

Last year when I joined the end of term party went a little like this:
-Girls came in with their contribution to the party food. Someone passed me a bottle of cherryade (I honestly thought they stopped making this stuff in the 90s!!) and I hid it under the table. Then another parent came in with another two bottles of pop.

i made the food into a spread and the girls helped themselves. But the pop was still hidden as I honestly thought that kids didn't drink that stuff/parents wouldn't be too impressed if I poured it out. I must admit I felt uncomfortable serving it when the leader asked what had happened to it (I did ask each child if they were allowed to drink it at home before giving them a glass).

The girls had piles of party rings, jammy dodgers, sweets, watits, skips with one of those nasty tinned dog dogs etc all washed down with a cup of cherryade and coke.

Que absolute mayhem, imagine an American Black Friday sale. Girls not listening to instructions, running around, back chatting, being nasty to each other, not just having fun but being absolute nightmares. An hour later the girls are whining, getting hurt (not listening and messing around), crying for no real reason (struggling with the craft cause two to burst into tears) and just having a total come down. It. Was. Hell.

Now, not wanting to go into detail the other leader's daughter is the worst behaved and her ADHD is easily aggravated by junky food. If it was any other girl at brownies i would have called her parents to pick her up as a) I don't want to be held responsible b) gets aggressive with the others c) is just a plain nightmare. On most nights she can be kept engaged with 'being the helper' but after tonn loads of junk it's impossible but so are most of the other kids. See this is the problem if I write a nice little letter asking the parents to only send party food with the first three ingredients being 'natural' and no fizzy/artificial colours the other leader just doesn't get it. I don't want to be the leader who comes from out of town and kills the 60 year tradition but I just don't agree of giving kids pure shit. I wouldn't eat that stuff, nor let my kids eat it so why would I let other kids in my care eat it. It's a small village, and it seems that not much has changed in the last 100 years. So in my opinion nothing will unless small changes are made for the next generation. I guess I've answer my own AIBU but if I am being AIBU please be nice haha.

Don't be that adult who is so over concerned about what other people's kids are eating that they wreck parties to make themselves feel better

I agree with this. If as a parent you have a problem with your child having fizzy drinks/ party food then you should tell whoever is running the party. If a child has ADHD and is sensitive to sugar of course the parent would mention it.

Perfectly reasonable idea by the OP, in a sense adjusting for one of the members of the pack having a specific condition. Talking to the parents may make this easier to do.

I'm a Brownie leader and it's one evening out of many. I'd let this one go and see what you think for next year.

You sound unusual, in that you have very strong opinions about what otherseat and feel you have the right to police it and re-educate them.

^This. It is a once a year treat that they look forward to. Who are you to dictate what food and drink can be eaten or not. You haven’t even been there long enough and you are trying to tell people what to do.

You seem to think your role as an outsider is to come into a village community, educate them abd bring them up to date on all the trendy food obsessions of suburbia.

It's a party. A plastic tumbler of pop isn't like giving them crack.

If parents are sending them with party ring then the parents are fibe with it. They probably know that one night of junk food isn't the end of the world.

Next year it'll all be artisan sandwiches, cheese sticks, root veg crisps with water or natural juice but don't worry because they can have a tiny beetroot brownie on the way out.

A couple of things

@Animation86 said

(If funding is an issue, do you claim Gift Aid? You can do so via GG charity number(assuming you are in England))

PLEASE don't do this. Most English units don't have a charity number as only certain guiding units (districts etc) have the income levels to meet the requirements for a charity number.

If asked you say that your unit has 'exceped charity status' and give a link to the relevant law

www.gov.uk/government/publications/excepted-charities/excepted-charities--2#scout-and-guide-groups

The HQ charity number must only be used for money going to HQ or you must register for a number specifically for the unit.

BTW did all the people new to guiding find the guiders's hangout on the forum yet? 🙂 www.mumsnet.com/Talk/extra_curricular_activities/2775707-guiders-staff-room-part-3

There is no scientific evidence to prove that an overload of sugar causes hyperactivity, sounds like the chaos was probably caused by excitement, change of routine, just what girls are like when they get together. Lighten up, it was a party.

Oh god how utterly joyless.

Can you send out for pizzas and ask them to bring £2 each? Then it might seem more exciting and would look less like you had an issue with last year. Btw when you are in charge or volunteering there will always be people who moan....

I was a Brown Owl for many years and you really need to get a grip.

Firstly, you can't police what other people's children eat. That is bog standard party food although YABU as a leader to not sit down as a pack and write a shopping list and assign their final choices of party good to each child.

Seondly, if they are running around being a nightmare, you aren't doing your job properly. Why aren't they engaged in games, dancing and activities? Do you just feed them then let them run loose? That sounds bizarre and it's no wonder they're bored.

It's one night a year. Let them eat crap and enjoy themselves if the parents are fine with it.

Just eat towards the end. After the craft - then send the sugar high brownies home. One evening of eating rubbish does not make an unhealthy diet.

God is there no place for learning how to have a pig out for Xmas but be sensible the rest of the time?

If any parent cared strongly enough they would make you aware that their child shouldn't eat X/Y/Z.

If any parent doesn't care at all and their child drinks cherryade all day every day, then feeding them one carrot stick at the brownies Xmas party isn't going to change that.

There is no scientific evidence to prove that an overload of sugar causes hyperactivity, sounds like the chaos was probably caused by excitement, change of routine, just what girls are like when they get together.

That's what I was going to say. You could probably feed them nothing but raw vegetables and water and you'd have the same hell.

I'd be horrified if my kids went on a junk escapade at Brownies. You can have treats without the serious junk - marshmallows, cordial, crisps, cupcakes, sandwiches.
Definitely should be the last activity, not the first.

Sugar doesn't cause hyperactivity. It doesn't aggravate ADHD symptoms. There's plenty of research on this.

They were probably just like that because of the party atmosphere.

If the parents are sending the stuff in they must be ok with it.

I don't personally serve kids fizzy juice, but fell you are massively overreacting, and overstepping. It's not normal to be so invested in what others eat as a one off.

If you want to encourage a healthier approach try what the other poster suggested who said assign something to each kid. But a party isn't a party without a few party rings etc.

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However personally I would insist that Party Rings are never brought again as they are gross chunks of dry cardboard disguised as food Never liked them!

I am a BB captain and have being doing parties for years. Planning is key. We do a couple of easy seasonal crafts to begin with, then some active games - team games and individual ones. About half an hour before the end, the kids get the food, portioned out either in party boxes or on paper plates. We usually stop after a couple of games so that the boys can have a drink as well.

After snack, we plan a quiet came like pass the pumpkin/cauldron/santa hat so that they are not running around full pelt making themselves sick.

This outline has served us well for many years and avoids too much over excitement.

Good grief. It's a party!

I don't generally allow my kids to drink fizzy drinks, but that's why it's a treat to be allowed them a couple of times a year at a fun event.

It is not for you to police what the child with ADHD eats. If you genuinely think the bad behaviour is linked to the food, then why not leave food to the last 30 minutes of the party and do games and activities first? Keep it very structured if you don't want chaotic behaviour.

Are you sure the food and drink was the reason behind behaviour?
I think as it's the parents providing the food you risk the parents backlash of you stop it straight away.
Wish here was a solution but I think you may just have to just send a letter askijg for food donations but no fizzy pop please as it spills easily and you are providing bottles of something!??? That don't spill

Also leave the food till the end of the party. Last 15 mins.

X-post with less stressed. That is exactly the sort of format I would suggest.

@becles
I’m in Scotland and that’s what we’ve always been led to believe English units have to do, interesting, thanks for the info. Up here every single unit should be registered as a charity in their own right

It's definitely the atmosphere not the food.

Haven't you been to regular children's birthday parties? The kids are over excited from the moment they arrive. In fact in my experience they start to calm down when the food comes out!

Getting the food yourself isn't something I'd do, but it's 100x better than a letter specifying "first 3 ingredients natural"!

There are lots of good suggestions here about managing the format of the party that will help.

To reduce the sugar overall, and the complication of asking who is allowed fizzy pop, why not just say in the letter "food contributions only please - we'll provide the drinks". Totally non judgemental and an excuse to put any pop aside.

I think you’ve got a discipline problem not a party food one!
Brownies are still 7-10 aren’t they?

Que absolute mayhem, imagine an American Black Friday sale. Girls not listening to instructions, running around, back chatting, being nasty to each other, not just having fun but being absolute nightmares. An hour later the girls are whining, getting hurt (not listening and messing around), crying for no real reason (struggling with the craft cause two to burst into tears) and just having a total come down. It. Was. Hell

I wouldn’t have dared behave like that at brownies or anywhere at that age tbf. My brownies had a annual sleepover and we’d have a midnight feast (only at about 10pm) we’d eat all sorts if sugary rubbish and I never remember anyone of us behaving the way you describe. Do you have yellow/red card rules? Being nasty or back chatting would have got us banned for a week, a repeat would could have seen us banned completely.

If you want to change the food though, I’d say the simplest way would be to ask for a contribution of say £1 per child and you do the shopping and food prep. Just say it’s so you don’t end up with too much of the same thing.
We used to get a McD’s happy meal at our Xmas party with a McFlurry for after. Although I’m sure we didn’t pay either, it came out of our yearly subs, not sure without checking with my mum though.