To cancel the traditional sugar fest at Brownies.

[SoddingSoda]

I started volunteering at a Brownie unit around a year ago after moving back to the area. I absolutely love the girls and how enthusiastic they are, and also the other fellow leader/parent helpers are fantastic. In the summer term I took over the unit as the leader in charge stepped down due to family commitments but still continues to attend most weeks.

Last year when I joined the end of term party went a little like this:
-Girls came in with their contribution to the party food. Someone passed me a bottle of cherryade (I honestly thought they stopped making this stuff in the 90s!!) and I hid it under the table. Then another parent came in with another two bottles of pop.

i made the food into a spread and the girls helped themselves. But the pop was still hidden as I honestly thought that kids didn't drink that stuff/parents wouldn't be too impressed if I poured it out. I must admit I felt uncomfortable serving it when the leader asked what had happened to it (I did ask each child if they were allowed to drink it at home before giving them a glass).

The girls had piles of party rings, jammy dodgers, sweets, watits, skips with one of those nasty tinned dog dogs etc all washed down with a cup of cherryade and coke.

Que absolute mayhem, imagine an American Black Friday sale. Girls not listening to instructions, running around, back chatting, being nasty to each other, not just having fun but being absolute nightmares. An hour later the girls are whining, getting hurt (not listening and messing around), crying for no real reason (struggling with the craft cause two to burst into tears) and just having a total come down. It. Was. Hell.

Now, not wanting to go into detail the other leader's daughter is the worst behaved and her ADHD is easily aggravated by junky food. If it was any other girl at brownies i would have called her parents to pick her up as a) I don't want to be held responsible b) gets aggressive with the others c) is just a plain nightmare. On most nights she can be kept engaged with 'being the helper' but after tonn loads of junk it's impossible but so are most of the other kids. See this is the problem if I write a nice little letter asking the parents to only send party food with the first three ingredients being 'natural' and no fizzy/artificial colours the other leader just doesn't get it. I don't want to be the leader who comes from out of town and kills the 60 year tradition but I just don't agree of giving kids pure shit. I wouldn't eat that stuff, nor let my kids eat it so why would I let other kids in my care eat it. It's a small village, and it seems that not much has changed in the last 100 years. So in my opinion nothing will unless small changes are made for the next generation. I guess I've answer my own AIBU but if I am being AIBU please be nice haha.

Yeah because I'm sure hospitals up and down the country are backed up to the hilts this morning with fat kids who've consumed too much cherryade and only a handful of adults who had way too much to binge drink last night.

I agree museumum. I'm wondering what the craft was. Especially with one girl having ADHD. My DS has ASD&ADHD. Some crafts he'll happily do, others he wouldn't sit still for longer than a few minutes if you paid him.

Surely it'd have been better to do party games instead of a craft, did you do any party games too @soddingsoda?

Yabvu it's a one off party, not every week.

I'm with you. The thing is its not just 'once a year' - those same girls will be having christmas parties at gymnastics, school, football etc etc as well, plus 'indulgent' food at home all through advent and christmas.

Is there some central girlguiding advice about healthy eating, or can you seek it? Or weave it into a topic for the girls - what non sugary natural foods would you like to include in our spread, as well as a cake, some crisps and some chocolate? Try not to get into too much detail about 'healthy' versus 'unhealthy' foods, as this is impossible to define, and can be a trigger point for girls vulnerable to obsessions or eating disorders. Just talk about 'having a treat' but keeping a healthy balance.

As a cub leader, we always do a Christmas party. I don’t have a problem with giving the cubs some sugary food, but I don’t give them fizzy drinks, as I know some parents would have an issue with this.

I put a notice out on our Facebook page to ask parents to bring a food contribution, and I make a list of suggestions, including carrot sticks, tomatoes etc as well as sandwiches, crisps, cake and so on. It seems to work, and we get a good variety of foods.

I always state that we will provide drinks (usually water or squash)

I agree that you should do activities/ games first, food at end. It really helps! We’ve never had a problem with bad behaviour (at least, no worse than a normal meeting!)

No child gets fat from having fizzy drinks and party rings at parties. How often realistically does this happen? For us we have parties probably about twice a month, maybe a few more at Christmas time. If children are getting a balanced diet at home and are active then it really won’t matter. Most people in real life seem fine letting their children have pop sometimes and the occasional jammy dodger. It’s only on Mumsnet people think it’s some major parenting achievement that their 32 year old child has never had a sip of coke.

Exactly, these parties will not be often, it does not constitute the main part of a child's diet!

Re ADHD and sugar

No link.

And yes we have lots of anecdotes about how some people couldn't eat blue smarties in the eighties - I have my own anecdotes about how my organic seeded toddler tried to fling himself into Rutland Water whilst watched in horrified silence by his Haribo-Bedazzled chum on a picnic with preschool. Sugar doesn't cause or exacerbate ADHD, brain chemistry malfunctions due to an underdeveloped frontal lobe cause it, and excitement can exacerbate the behavioural symptoms.

Have you actually asked the Brownies what they would like at their party? Guiding is after all supposed to be girl led ( about 50% girl input and 50% adult at Brownie age). I am probably like the guider you took over from, as I run a village pack for many years. I usually give the girls the choice to either have a sit down tea and a few games at a party or, to spend most of the evening on party games and just have a snack. Most years they choose games over food.

I haven't read the whole thread but surely there's a middle ground to be had?

Why not put up a list of food broken down into small chunks and ask people to put their name to a specific item?

For example,

25 cocktail sausages x2
2 bags of sharing crisps x2
10 cupcakes
bunch of grapes
packet of cheese twists
etc.
That way you have some control over what's provided, it's not massively expensive for anyone and manageable.

And a BIG notice above stating that you will provide water or squash.

It’s one party. It’s once a year and you have absolutely no business as a Brownie leader trying to police what the girls have at this one party. If the girls then go to other parties, it is up to their parents to check and balance.

Our girl rarely has fizzy drinks, but she knows she is allowed to at a party (except irn bru - it does something crazy to her!). We never have fizzy drinks on the house, so it’s perfectly fine for her to have it when out. And she also is quite good at self regulating so if she’s faced with the option more than a couple of times a week, she will choose something else. But, at that party, you will see her drinking the juice and eating the sweet stuff and assuming she is going to grow up to be obese, apparently.

I agree with those who are saying this was a leadership problem, not a sugar problem. Our unit had a Halloween party, full of sugar and excitement. The girls behaved very well, because they were listening to the leaders.

Ask for a small financial contribution and do the food yourself. Also, perhaps do craft first, food at end and then they go home.