The worst complaint you have ever received

[planetclom]

I’ll start.
Someone complained they when they arrived early for an appointment I saw them early, they did not want to be seen early ...
Someone complained that I was only interested in box ticking and in the next sentence complained I spend to long trying to sort out their issue...

Work in the NHS if that is relevant, I suspect it is.

I had an alcoholic complain that I detoxed him against his will.

My manager responded, saying in essence, that my patient was in prison and alcohol was illegal in prison, so as a detox nurse I had fulfilled my obligation by giving him a safe and gentle alcohol detox.

I get complaints (10+ a day) from prisoners that I’ve stopped their nicotine replacement therapy. I stop it because they are smoking the plastic patches mixed with the contents of a tea bag and spice, and I don’t want the plastic to damage their lungs!

I also have patients complain that I’ve cancelled their prescription, which only ever happens if I see them giving their medication away at the meds queue.

Once I had 32 angry men all shouting abuse at me from behind their cell doors as I had the audacity to have a spice attack, caused by inhaling passive smoke when helping a prisoner who had overdosed on spice, meaning I was incapacitated and it was not safe for me to give them their medication!

The judge Judy outcome was basically he gave the dog back when he didn’t have to. Because he had adopted the dog he could do what he wanted provided it wasn’t to harm the dog and yes she was raging

Bleak oh god, did you keep a straight face? I would have howled like a hyena and fell to the floor. One of my worst traits is that if I start screaming with laughter I do literally keel over to the floor.

I was travelling back from London on the train which was unfortunately delayed slightly, but still enough to miss the last local connecting train home at York.

We were met by a GNER (at that time) member of staff who asked us to wait there whilst she organised taxi’s for us. A couple of minutes later I was affronted by an obviously angry woman who was demanding to know where her taxi was, I simply stated that someone had said they were being arranged. This obviously wasn’t a satisfactory reply, as the woman proceeded to loudly vent her spleen at me, despite my stating that I didn’t work for the railway and was merely like her a passenger.

When the taxi’s arrived, by joyful coincidence I lived in the same locality to her in my home-town 20 minutes drive away, so I had to enjoy her continual moaning and promises to make a formal complaint about my “unhelpfulness” and “attitude” during the journey home. My pointing out that just because I was wearing a charcoal grey suit, it didn’t mean I was a railwayman didn’t seem to help.

Thankfully, I was sat in the front with the driver, even he said “look he doesn’t work for the railway, so why don’t you quieten down etc”, but she was having none of it. I think the final straw for her must have been when the taxi driver said, “I’ll drop you off first” to me – which was followed by more accusations, threats of complaints, repercussions etc….

BSA5431

But at least you aren't married to her - Some poor bugger probably been got GBH of the ear'ole for weeks about that - and with the added garnish of the taxi driver's attitude of dropping her off first, and your attitude of actually getting out of the cab, and leaving her, A Defenceless Woman, alone with a taxi driver who could very well be a murderer (and might have been by the end of the journey - who knows )

*you off first, not her

(sorry)

I would suggest "no problem" and similar are often verbal fillers, ie said not for their meaning but just to be saying something : "fillers are parts of speech which are not generally recognized as purposeful or containing formal meaning...normally frowned upon in mass media ...but they occur regularly in everyday conversation, sometimes representing upwards of 20% of "words" in conversation. Fillers can also be used as a pause for thought." (Good old Wikipedia)

ReturnOfTheMackYesItIs I used to work in a spit-and-sawdust pub and someone came in once & asked for some sort of complicated cocktail. The response from the rather puzzled barman was "I could do you a gin & tonic!". Can't remember if they took him up on it but at least it got a laugh

I worked for the NHS. I've had more unreasonable complaints than you could shake a stick at.
One vile woman rang up screaming and shouting that her 14 year old had to have most of his teeth removed because they were all 'black and rotten.' This was my fault as I worked for the NHS and it was our responsibility to keep his teeth nice.

I actually had some pervy guy complain that I slapped his hand away when he put it down my top to check if I was wearing a bra

That day was the first time I ever heard my boss swear actually. The guy seemed to honestly think I would get fired for not letting him grope me.

Batshite that's an assault.