AIBU to get butt-hurt about pples reaction to my pregnancy ?!..

[Littlehouseonthepraririe]

Am pregnant with my 6th! I want to share the good news on facebook, not with a fanfare or some obscure balloon riddled/ cryptic sign (tho I do enjoy other pples announcements like that)! But just with a standard f.b post as we have a lot of friends /fam all over the world (and mainly because I'm excited)!

However, when I shared the news of our 5th along with the congratulations I had a Lot of OMG ur mental/ mad etc comments.

Would I look weird if along with sharing the news I tagged on a little light hearted something like ' we know the Waltons life isn't for everyone and we might seem a bit bonkers, but we are really excited to introduce a new member to our clan'.. In the hope that it will ward off What's Wrong With You type comments ?!?

We have a large home for lots of children and my OH works from home so the children aren't lacking in time or space etc and they are always asking for more siblings, and this is the life I've Always wanted, so I don't really Get why pple would write comments like I had last time..
I mean I have lots of friends travelling in the back of beyond or moving up the corporate ladder , which personally is my idea of hell, but I am genuinely happy that they are happy and following their dreams, so obviously just write positive, congratulatory comments when they announce they've landed in a new country / got a promotion..
Am I being butt-hurty and overly sensitive unnecessarily , and would it look rude for me to write something jokey in an attempt to ward off the bat shit crazy comments..?

You are so blinkered PeiPeiPing.
Breastfeeding past a year isn’t weird. There are no negatives. It is environmentally sound and good for mother and child.

Plenty of larger families don’t claim any benefits and never have. They are all highly educated and successful people.
Jacob Rees Mogg, for example, Nicola Horlick for another. Then Jude Law, Angelina Jolie, Eddie Murphy. Amongst four plus families I know there are couples who are Consultant Physician/Solicitor (6), Chemistry teacher/Covil engineer (5), GP/GP (6), Dentist/Planing Officer (5), Diver/Primary teacher (5), Politician/Barrister (4) Urologist/Paediatrician (7).

Plenty of advantages for those from larger families. Most of the young adults I know are well adjusted, able to commit to long term relationships, love their siblings dearly, are home frequently through choice and are confident, successful young adults.

Sorry Daily Mail article
www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-3204000/Big-FAMILIES-new-status-symbol-s-not-just-parents-Benefits-Street-affluent-having-mega-broods.html
But also Guardian
www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2012/apr/01/elizabeth-day-large-families
And the Independent
www.independent.co.uk/voices/large-families-queen-victoria-immigration-improve-the-economy-a7233466.html
And The Telegraph
www.telegraph.co.uk/education/3356892/The-bigger-the-family-the-better-says-Cassandra-Jardine.html

There is NOTHING positive about having 6 kids in this day and age.

Adding yet another human to the planet COMPLETELY outweighs those other life choices of being vegan and driving eco cars.

You should really know that since your husband works for an environmental company.

*In terms of carbon footprint (I lost my original post)

Best time to announce is after the babies born with a cute pic, nonone would be insensitive enough to put a rude comment on that. Would they?

Just say what you want to say. You're hormonal it's going to make you more sensitive to comments. People like that won't get it whatever you say.

I have twins and I get "you've got your hands full" (imagine negative tone) and similar negative rude comments 6-10 times on a trip to the supermarket.
I've taken the tact of being happy and breezy "yes there's another one too", "I'm very lucky". Usually confuses the negative ones into submission. Give it a try. It's amusing at least.

Focus on the positive people who have brains.

Wow. The vile spiteful brigade are out in force on this thread. Ugh, nasty people, what little rays of sunshine you are. Pat yourselves on the back for your clever, cutting comments.

Congrats op, we’re suffering from secondary infertility and I’m very envious of you having six!

Still laughing my tits off st the poster who thinks 'butt-hurt' is slang for being dominated by anal rape.

Some people have overly vivid imaginations.

I wasn't going to bother coming back on here to comment, but felt it rude to not thank those who have left lovely, kind and congratulatory posts Thank you :)

Honestly, the rest of you - I suggest you start your own environmental thread. My children are Here, so what good is it telling me that they shouldn't be ? Am not really sure what you are trying to achieve ..

Those of you who took time out of your lives to leave comments such as ; this baby is more likely to be disabled / your children less intelligent because there's lots of them (in case you're actually concerned I can reassure you that this isn't the case with mine)/ your grammar is rubbish/ lol you used txt speak in your post etc I can only presume you have unhappy lives to leave such shitty, pointless comments on what was meant to be a light hearted, happy post.

For those of you obsessively talking about how we can't have enough money to look after our children / your DH can't earn more than 60k and work from home , and have time to interact with your DC, let me reassure you once and for all- he actually earns more like 150k and the business pretty much runs itself by this stage , so he only has to make the odd phone call throughout the day. We have 7 bedrooms , so all the children have their own room to retreat to, if they wish to (though every weekend they Choose to make dens in one of the bedrooms and all sleep under it together❤ They would do this every night , but we like them to have a proper sleep on a school night). I'm sorry if our life enrages some of you. I know we are very fortunate. If it makes a difference my husband and I were just as in love and happy when we were starting out and I was studying and his yearly wage was 14k . The money is a necessity to have the family we want and that he has worked very hard for. We give an absolute fortune away in tax and Again obv receive no tax credits ourselves !

I'm sorry some of you had crappy childhoods as a result of being in a large family. I guess, I can only reassure you that my children enjoy their childhood immensely , that their friends are always angling to stay at ours and that our house is always filled with family and visitors because our home is a happy one and people enjoy coming to it and being part of it. Xmas will be absolutely rammed with guests popping in (which makes it even more special and the children love- yes they are consulted) because people Enjoy being around our family and our children and all eloquent, sociable and happy (!)

Thank you to those of you from big families who left comments to say how close you are to siblings/ how fondly you remember your childhoods :) My children often talk about how when they grow up they will travel / live together etc
And yes, they Do ask if we can add to the family with another sibling , when we tell them the news they will be over the moon .

I will merely skip over any comments left now tht are negative, as the original post said - I'm not interested in unkindness. Though a lot of you seem to enjoy being unkind to someone who is pregnant , that's your own issue and I hope in real life , when you don't have a username to hide behind you are nicer people .

(Additionally) I can't be bothered to scroll through the negs (OH No, I used a slang word I must be ''too young to be able to parent 6 children")!
But I wanted to say to the woman who left a lovely comment &also discussed the loss of her twins- I'm so sorry, my heart goes out to you xXxX

Those of you who also discussed that you can't or have struggled to have children, or left posts to suggest my having 6 and discussing it on Facebook is insensitive to those who can't have children , I (as everyone does) do know women in that very sad situation and I'm really sorry if you felt my OP, or my attitude to be boastful or it made you feel crap. Its not my intention , and I really do feel an awful lot for you. I can't imagine the hurt, and I certainly don't want to add to it. And will be more mindful of any Facebook announcement I do make. Which (despite the charming comments left saying no1 actually gives a shit) I will do, as this baby deserves to be celebrated as much as my first, because it's a wanted person in its own right, and I would hate for my fb friends and family to feel that this baby isn't wanted if I failed to mention the news like I did with my others.

Again, thanks for the positivity , hope you all have a good day and a(n early) Merry Xmas to you all

I think you can have as many children as you want and your set up sounds amazing.

I am interested in your comments about money though. Is it your view that people should only have lots of children if they can afford what is basically two non working parents, a bedroom each and so on. That’s how your posts read and if that is what you feel you actually have quite a lot in common with the negative posters on this thread!

Splendide, I appreciate your question - I didn't mean for it to come across like that, I was just responding to the negative comments people had left me saying things like - your children must be unhappy crammed into a house together/ unable to have hobbies because you won't be able to afford it etc..
I actually felt pretty crass discussing money and house sizes, which is why I only played our situation out after 13 pages of comments questioning our circumstances (as if they impacted on my DC happiness) .

My lot hardly ever spend time away from each other in their rooms and our house at night is like musical beds because they'd much rather stay together all the time. We bought bunk beds for the rooms for this reason , so no- i really don't feel someone should be chastised for having children with less money or a smaller house. As I said above, we didn't start out with my husband's wage, and we were just as happy :)

If I’m honest then I do believe the governments of the world should be looking at limiting the number of children people are allowed to have from the perspective of future resource issues etc. HOWEVER since they haven’t done so yet that means childbirth is purely a choice based on people’s beliefs and desires. So congratulations on your newest soon to be addition to the family. Do I think you’re crazy? Yup, but that’s a compliment because clearly you have this mum thing aces to be wanting more. I have two children and will be having no more because honestly I feel like as hard as I try, I am clueless and inadequate as a parent most of the time. so for anyone to have three times that many must require super mum 😂

Honestly, the rest of you - I suggest you start your own environmental thread. My children are Here, so what good is it telling me that they shouldn't be ? Am not really sure what you are trying to achieve ..

You started your thread asking if you were being unreasonable to be butt hurt about people's reaction to your sixth baby, so what did you expect?

On the face of it, I would guess that you move in some environmentally aware circles (your husband works for an 'environmental company', whatever the fuck that is, and being vegan). I find it hard to square that with you being completely unaware of the ethical objections surrounding enormous families, but now you're not, so job done.

Please think of this thread if you consider a seventh kid.

I’m a bit of an eco warrior so I wouldn’t be over the moon with your announcement. But if we were RL friends you would know that

Good god Crumbs did you imagine we'd be moved by a list of celebrities having lots of children? How fatuous are you?

I really don't care how affluent, middle class, or high-achieving you think the products of large families are (hint: they tend not to be). I care about their footprint. In this sense it's better for poor people to have bigger families than wealthy ones, because they consume far less.

Crumbs has brought celebs into this because she doesn’t actually have children.

Some how also trying to turn this into a BF V FF argument.

Next it’ll be WC v MC

I actually find it hysterical you mentioned Jacob Reese Mogg - he’s anti abortion for a start so of course he has lots of kids (unless abortion results in him making a profit of course using Yano the abortion pills he invested in)

For every moaning environmental post I'm going to burn a tyre in the garden....

Also, crumbs

You were slagging off people for living apart, but everyone on your list is divorced apart from Rees-Mogg and he would never get divorced as it goes against his religious beliefs.

OP, if you don’t like unkindness, I suggest (a) you don’t post on AIBU, and (b) you don’t announce your 6th pregnancy on Facebook.

I'm one of six and didn't like it mainly because with the best will in the world my Mother just could not give us the amount of attention that smaller sibling groups get. My best childhood memory is being taken out by my Mother by myself. It happened once in my entire childhood.

This isn't about carbon footprints or even money it's about time spent, no one can split themselves in to six pieces. I'm very close to two sisters, slightly less so the others. That's the other point with large groups of siblings you can get some kind of faction splitting sometimes, if I want a weekend away I dont always want it to be six of us but I know people can feel hurt if left out.