To think you often get a better discussion with men?

[splendidisolation]

I've been noticing this fairly often recently.

It seems easier to get into debates/quite in depth discussion about politics or ideas, more conceptual/abstract stuff with men than it does women.

Obviously my female friends are like this, that's why we're friends! I'm talking about casual encounters, random people you meet through events or friends of friends.

At least, it seems more frequent or easier to go down the path of having those more "pondering" discussions with a lot of the men I come across, whereas with women it tends to focus on their families, or past relationships, music, books, clothes, travel etc. More "real life" stuff.

Have you noticed this, and if you have, why is it?

I am a man. I disagree. Subjects are more varied in conversations with women.

I do find that with men you can disagree and they don't get angry and personal like on this forum. They sort of just, politely disagree and that's it.

I am a man. I disagree. Subjects are more varied in conversations with women

Now you've caused us all a dilemma.

I do find that with men you can disagree and they don't get angry and personal like on this forum

That's because they're not listening to you.

*However, what really interests me is response to the OP. They have posed a question and, from the replies I've seen, the majority of posters have not chosen to debate the topic, but instead make fun of the poster.

Which, given I'm assuming most posters thus far are women, does rather give credit to the original point made....*

Exactly. No-one in AIBU seems to be able to rationally debate an abstract point, they just take cheap pot shots at each other.

That's because they're not listening to you.

They are, because they reply with some counter-points to my points in the debate. The difference being you don't get called goady/given biscuits/told to fuck off/ODFOD/called a cow/the many other things I've seen on AIBU....

Yolo - have you ever had a debate with aman that started woth you saying 'I think you are dull and incapable of debate, and deep interesting coversation purely because of your sex, and I won't listen to any arguments to the contrary ?'

Because of you haven't then you can hardly compare this thread to debates you have had with men.

'I think you are dull and incapable of debate, and deep interesting coversation purely because of your sex, and I won't listen to any arguments to the contrary ?'

But the OP didn't say that, did she. She didn't say women were dull/incapable of debate and that she won't listen to counterrarguments - she said that in her experience, she ends up discussing people/things/events with women and abstract concepts with men, which she finds more interesting to talk about, and have other people found this to be the case?

That's a perfectly valid non-offensive question.

Persnally, I haven't found that, as I have the most political/philosophical conversations with my mum and my most bitchy-gossipy ones with my male friends. But I don't see any reason for all the rudeness to OP. And being rude to OP instead of just debating the bloody point seems to be a feature of AIBU.

Please can someone go on Reddit, that arse one or the other site that men frequent (I think it’s called ‘the internet’) and post the OP, just with male and female switched and report back on the measured, Debate Team stylee responses?

And it's not really an abstract point is it? More a sweeping generalisation based on virtually no evidence

It is using the very small sample 'men and women I have talked to' and extrapolating a general principal. Rather shaky grounds on which to build an argument. More lazy, woolly thinking than the deep philosophical debate the OP hankers after.

I get better discussions with my family than my in-laws. The man thing - no.

I've worked in male dominated places and it was football tedium a lot of the time tb frank. Mixed groups tend to more varied conversation ime.

I dunno, doesn't everyone "notice" things in their social circle/life and wonder if it generalises to everyone?

But I don't see any reason for all the rudeness to OP. And being rude to OP instead of just debating the bloody point seems to be a feature of AIBU.

I think starting a thread which you know will provoke strong feelings then disappearing only to momentarily reappear to say you won't engage with people, is the height of rudeness.
OP starts a thread presumably to provoke debate then can't be bothered to debate, or is unable to robustly defend her argument. Which is probably why people were getting irritated with her.
You can't really debate a topic when one side of the argument is out to lunch.

It is also hard to debate anything with someone who sets out their stall at the outset by saying they don't enjoy debating with women. You're on a bit of a hiding to nothing. Despite that I'd have discussed the issue with the OP, if she'd had the courage of her convictions and turned up to the dance.

Man here too. A Bit mixed - it depends what one is looking for, in conversation, but yes women are broader in their topics and quite a bit funnier.
Just read above that women will tend to become 'subversive' and take disagreement personal. (hence the spontaneous fighting on MN) Men will just give a gallic shrug of shoulders. And yes ime women DO want the last word...

Strictly

No we don’t.

I don't agree with your view Yolo - but I very much respect the fact that you have had the courtesy to reply to people and to argue your point. That is generally all people ask in AIBU. On all sorts topics, OP get a better reception if they at least engage.

Yabu

U remind me of the woman i sit beside at work who laughs gaily at all the men and literally doesnt even hear me when i say something funny! She has selective deafness around mere women

If a man proudly proclaims he gets on better with men than women, he is roundly (and rightly) dismissed as a sexist twat.

If a woman does the same, the same applies.

Your post just makes me want to make this face...
You can't really be serious that you did not intend/anticipate you would get a bad reaction to posting on a Womens Forum that IYHO women were by implication, a bit stupid?

I haven't experienced this at all.
I do chat about more mundane things with women but that's probably because I interact with more women than men, also because it's mostly small talk with the school gate mums.

I find women and men equally interesting to talk to about more serious issues, but have found that women are a lot more open to hearing opinions. The men I've spoken with prefer to give their opinion than hear one.

At the school gate the dads and mums will talk about tv in the morning vs no tv, world bloody book day, the weather or sports. At work both men and women talk about the module plans, how to teach neural circuits and whether cardiac physiology should be moved to October. With male and female friends it is Brexit, wine, Zimbabwe and Music.

It's you, OP.

Superb example of why I'd rather discuss things with men, women ( yes the whole homogeneous mass of 'em) get a bit twatty at the drop of a hat.

Have you tried to discuss things with men on internet forums?