Is a nice advent calendar too much to expect?

[IsLindtTooMuchToAsk]

Ok, so......

Every year I buy DS and DH a well thought about, nice advent calendar, well in advance of December 1st.

Around about November 28th and usually while in the supermarket DH says “ooh, you don’t have an advent calendar yet, choose one you like while we’re here” and so I end up with “whatever’s left” in said Supermarket.

Same thing happens at Easter. Every. Fucking. Year.

So, around mid October this year I send DH a link to a very lovely advent calendar containing my absolute favourite chocolates (see username!) with a jokey #justsaying lol he says “is that a hint? Lol” YES!!!

Cut to start of November I come home with advent calendars for them both. Knowing DH prefers sweets to chocolate I bought him a Haribo one. Top wife points!!

Now here’s my dilemma...... there has been no hint or suggestion of my advent calendar so do I:

A) hold out til December 1st in the hope that my hint plus Haribo effort get me the advent calendar of my dreams?

B) start dropping some MAJOR hints again while he still has time to sort it?

C) outright tell him that he better be planning to buy me the fucking advent calendar.

D) but it myself because let’s face it, I’m not getting the advent calendar from DH am I?

Buy it yourself when you're buying DC advent calendars. Get one for DH too if you fancy! Why stick to a "tradition" that just makes you unhappy. Also, have you noticed that DH isn't sticking to it himself when it comes to his own immediate family?

I'm still chuffed with myself for finding a knockoff scented candles advent calendar. £3.99. Bargain!

@ginwithcucumber have you seen the advent calendar from Morrisons?

huffingtonpost.co.uk/entry/morrisons-black-friday-gin-advent-calendar-deal-will-make-your-heart-sing_uk_5a0d4f79e4b0b17e5e1408d0

Fascinating.

Another one here who didn't realise advent calendars were an important part of anyone's life

It's just one of those things which have past me by i guess.

Surely its only in the last couple of years that they've been marketed at adults though. Previously it was crap waxy chocolate that you struggle to push out of the plastic, and prior to that we had proper calendars with pictures (which were just as exciting to open as a young child imo).

I must admit I've bought myself the M&S one this year simply because its such good value and I was buying school uniform anyway. I am struggling to understand the concept of adults getting annoyed about not having a chocolate advent calendar though. Buy yourself a bar of dairy milk!

We have a wooden one. Same every year and the DC take turns in opening it (bah humbug)

Surely its only in the last couple of years that they've been marketed at adults though.

Nope. They've made chocolate advent calendars for adults for years; at the very least, well over a decade or perhaps two.

Nope. They've made chocolate advent calendars for adults for years; at the very least, well over a decade or perhaps two

Which ones? I've only ever seen Cadbury's etc and chocolate advent calendars with kids characters on. Which brands have marketed them at adults for 10-20 years?

Advent calendars used to be for kids. Obviously companies were onto a good thing by realising they could market adult ones too. That doesn't mean that they aren't still a predominantly children's thing which few adults would expect or demand as a matter of course. As if there weren't enough grabbiness and angst surrounding the giving and receiving of actual Christmas presents, without getting all flouncy about advent calendars too!

Copy my trick - put DS in charge of yours. Then he will mither DH to get it, and you can hint to your hearts content about which one.

I always assumed those which are less obviously child like ie not covered in pokemon pictures or my little pony, were for slightly older children, not for fully grown adults.

I do accept that the ever increasing commercialisation of Christmas does now mean that every retailer has their own calendar for every person on the planet who might potentially have a few quid in their pocket. But I genuinely did think this was a new phenomenon over the past couple of years.

It's all bonkers. Grown ups do not need advent calendars at all. Buy yourself an actual treat instead.

If you have to heavily hint for a present, it's not a present.

The whole idea of advent calendars for adults is deeply bizarre anyway and a ridiculous commercial exploitation of what used to be a charming way for children to mark the run up to Christmas.

Adults have advent calendars? Seriously there's adults who will spend 60 quid on 24 gin miniatures instead of 25 quid on a decent bottle of gin? I'm astounded!

You just took the words right out of my mouth Desmondo

I'm glad so many posters are here to tell everyone else what the universal rules are for who is and isn't allowed advent calendars.

Buy your own and then get him the zoella one in revenge!

But a Jacquie Lawson online one for yourself couple of pounds as an adult I like them much better than paper or chocolate.

@EmilyChambers79 Yes, it is lovely to count down to Christmas

I don't really care about your definition of fun Silvercatowner

Surely this is not about the advent calendar.
It’s about the fact that OP’s DH has been informed that the gesture is important to OP and he isn’t responding to that?

@NewtsSuitcase They were originally targeted at all ages when they were all paper with meaningful symbols behind each door. Advert being a time of contemplation for Christians worldwide in the lead up to Christmas Day.

"I'm glad so many posters are here to tell everyone else what the universal rules are for who is and isn't allowed advent calendars."

So am I. Some people need telling!

Seriously-it's not about who is allowed. It's about what's important. If the advent calendar thing is a symptom of the way the OP is treated in her family, then that needs addressing-and not by buying herself one. If her family know that this is a big deal for her and still don't get her one then they are being unkind and unfair. But it's not like women having to buy their own Christmas presents. Everyone knows that people in a family buy each other presents, and not buying one for someone, or expecting them to buy their own is the action of an arsehole. Not buying an adult an advent calendar is not necessarily the action of an arsehole. Although it could well be.

I have the liberty one (I did last year as well) and I bought it myself. I wouldn’t have wanted to leave it to anyone else to buy as they sell out so quickly.

Its a fucking advent calendar and youre an adult. Grow up.

Well I definitely don’t think you’re being unreasonable Op.
For me it wouldn’t be the advent calendar itself, it’s the lack of thought. If you’ve always put some effort in to get one he likes, I’d expect that same effort back.
I’m really not one for expensive gifts or anything, but my favourite bar of chocolate when I’m feeling down or things like this, knowing which advent calendar I’d love.
I think those little things matter.

And definitely no age limit on a advent calendar. My grandad makes my grandma one up every year, it’s a cloth one but he fills it with her favourite sweets/chocolates.

You should buy it for yourself and then tell your DH he owes you ten quid, so it’s still a gift from him.

My nine year old has asked for the Asda cheese one - I have been to about 20 Asdas and they are completely sold out.