to want to give my two year old the best Christmas ever

[mancmama1614]

When I was a little girl, growing up my parents were really poor. However they saved all year for Christmas and used to spend up to £1k on each of us so we had loads of Christmas presents to open. We made loads of family Christmas memories too (Disney on ice, Christmas Eve hampers, eve-of-the-eve-of-Christmas-eve presents) and I look back on those Christmases with the fondest of memories.
Now, I am in a similar position to what my mum and dad were in when they were younger; my partner earns a good salary (I am a SAHM) however we are paying off quite hefty debts from our hedonistic twenties 🙄 so we are strictly on a tight budget.
AIBU to still go what some people would class as overboard at Christmas? So far the presents I have bought him are about 35 in total, I have spent about £350-£400 (don't count) but still want to get him all the clangers merchandise which will be another £150.
Added to this there will be visits to the santa train, Christmas parties at all the playgroups we go to and a winter wonderland trip.
His birthday is in January and we would like to have a big party for him and all his friends and also buy about 10-15 presents for that too.
Can I just add we aren't taking out any credit for this because I wouldn't be accepted for any anyway
All I see on Facebook and in the news are people only buying their kids one present, letting the grandparents pick up the slack or following that bloody soulless four gift rule.
Not buying for adults this year and me and my partner aren't buying for each other but we are buying for kids of friends.
Does anyone else do a Christmas like this when they are on a bit of a budget? Or any free trip ideas (ideally in Manchester) to add an extra special touch?

Also, £1k could go towards a lovely holiday for you all. Maybe take him to Germany or Austria for Christmas- they are very big on Christmas there and you may get snow! And think of the amazing chocolate and gingerbread houses!

That's way too much IMO, and very overwhelming for a 2-year-old, who will expect nothing and not remember it later. My 2.5 year old refused to open more than a few presents on Christmas day.

I agree with a lot of the above, he's two, he won't remember that much. Even when he's older if you give him 35 presents that's a lot! He'll get bored of opening the things.
You've already got him lots of stuff, split it between Christmas and his birthday and concentrate on giving him good memories, loads of cheap/free suggestions above.
Start creating some family traditions, because when he's 35years old with his own kids he's going to remember making biscuits every Christmas Eve with you etc...not how many presents he had under the tree.

Personally I remember one or two Christmas presents in particular when I was young and they stick in my mind because I was particularly 'desperate' for them.

The things I remember most are the things we did as a family together, including our lovely, long family holidays abroad. My parents obviously bought us presents, they were not poor nor particularly loaded, but I think they'd agree that in terms of budgeting they prioritised the family holidays. I think it paid off as both of my sisters and I have some lovely memories of our experiences. I too would prioritise my budgeting to enable us to do things together throughout the year.

I think you're slightly crazy, sorry. Particularly for a two year old. But as always with these things, if you and your dh are happy with your choice then who is anyone else to rain on your parade?!

It's your choice how you spend your money. It's not something I would do. I don't care if it is what you want to do. To me, Christmas is magical whether you spend £10 or £1000 on kids. It shouldn't take 35 presents to make it magical.

But you are definitely unreasonable for asking people what they think about throwing away what they consider to be ridiculous amounts of money on a two year old on one event in a year to buy toys I can guarantee will barely ever make it out of the cupboard beyond January, when he no doubt will get another pile of plastic tat, then complaining their responses are harsh.

I’d go for quality presents over quantity. My daughter was 2 last year and we didn’t go overboard but with gifts from grandparents etc it took about 2 weeks to open all her presents as it was overwhelming. With all those presents he won’t end up using/ playing with everything.

I just asked my daughter what Father Christmas brought her last year and she can’t remember.

Stealth brag 😂 Not at all, I have no problem with families who only buy a few gifts or one if that's all they can afford or want to but all I see at the minute is people trying to put rules on Christmas - that rhyme really irritates me.

Are you for real OP

what a waste of money, he won't even have any concept of it.

And I agree with other posters that your parents were absolutely not poor if they could spend thousands at xmas, and if you've got debts to pay then you are insane to spend so much. Sorry YABVU.

Don't bitch about being judged when you've judged those who "buy 1 gift", "let the grandparents pick up the slack" or "followed the bloody soulless 4 present rule"

From being one of those kids who got everything I could ever ask for and now working with children who have very little aside from the love of their parents and a few other cherished items I can honestly say they are far more appreciative and just as happy if not happier than those like myself.

"all the clangers merchandise" Christ almighty.

You're a grown up, you can do what you want, but I wonder who you are really doing it for.

Your DS won't remember it at all and most children aged two don't really understand what is going on at Christmas anyway. He'd probably be just as happy playing in the used wrapping paper and cardboard boxes as he will on hundreds of pounds of presents.

To me, paying off debts would be more important, but it is your money, so you do what matters to you.

How long is going to be spent opening presents? How is he going to find the time to play with his new stuff? Where will it all live? I couldn't be arsed to wrap it all up, let alone find a home for it all. I really can't see this being an awful lot of fun for anyone.

The environmental impact isn't just about the boxes being recycled (the best thing you can do is reduce waste, then reuse then recycle) it is about the the oil used in the plastic, the fuel to transport etc.
I'm no lentil weaver but mass consumerism is just so wasteful. He can only physically play with one thing at once.
His generation will face some shit challenges due to climate change but as long as the look on his face is worth it..

Agree that a 2 year old will be overwhelmed by all of that stuff.

The one thing I agree with you about is the Xmas - eve - eve - eve presents BUT I do it as a way of spreading out the presents because toddlers really can only manage a few presents in a day before they get overwhelmed. We're still opening presents at new year, and that is with dp and I buying them very few presents, the majority come from kind grandparents, aunts and uncles, friends etc.

It's up to you how to do Xmas. But acknowledge that you are doing this for yourself. You have described a recipe for an overwhelmed and stroppy two year old with more presents than he could ever play with, let alone appreciate. He's too small to really enjoy many of the experiences too. I think you may be setting yourself up for disappointment when he doesn't behave with the joy you're expecting.

Just... No.

Even at 3 my DS found an average number of presents completely overwhelming (I think we got him 4 things ourselves but he had maybe 10 more from relatives).

He also didn't really enjoy Christmas activities much until 4.

good lord that's an insane amount of presents for a 2 year old...actually for any child.

would the look on his face for 1 clangers present not be as good as for 5 or 10 ?

we weren't poor growing up, we weren't rich either. my best christmas memories are of the things we did together, absolutely not what presents we got

my husband and I are better off, the kids (4 and 2) will get 2 or 3 presents from santa , 1 from each set of grandparents, and one from 3 each of 3 aunts/uncles.

I know they will be absolutely delighted with that, and the look on their faces will be every bit as good as if they got 20 gifts ....

My birthday is just before Christmas, as is DD1 and DD2's is early January.
I love this time of year, and it was always very special.
But if I recall back, I can only probably remember one or two of the gifts I received and not all the 'stuff'. I certainly don't remember my 2nd Christmas at all, so I've no idea if it was the best ever.

What I do remember are the experiences. Panto, visits to santa, Christmas markets, food and family on Christmas Day. If I were you, just get him one or two lovely things and concentrate on paying stuff off, so you're in a better position in years to come.

As an aside, my DD's got more presents than usual last year. We were moving house, and I lost track.
We all found the quantity, waste and mess overwhelming and actually, 'soulless'!
They'll be going back to a few items this year.

Yes you will doing your son a great disservice by keeping this up throughout his xmases. I think 12 presents (two decent ones and 10 little things) and a stocking is more than enough for a 2 year old. Do you really want a spoilt brat on your hands? Spend the money on doing lovely things with him - mine are older now and all they remember fondly is the fun things that we did - going for a long cold walk on xmas eve and then getting crisps and lemonade in the pub, going to the local garden centre xmas display, going to London and seeing the lights - inf act even as teens thats what they want to do this year although the lemonade may have been replaced by prosecco

Wait until you get that awful feeling on boxing day of 'where the hell am I going to put all this stuff?' and the need to throw out everything else you have just to make space.
Environmental impact does not just apply to the boxes things come in.
No matter how many gifts you buy, FGS wrap up as you go, many's the time I've been up until 0300 on Christmas eve, wrapping like a crazy dervish, to be woken by DCs at 0500.

Were your parents really poor because they were saving several grand a year?

Sod off op.

It is your life and your money to spend as you wish, however I would never scrimp all year to blow it all at Christmas. it is more important to me that my DC have things all year round, cinema trips, theatre trips, days out, cheap holidays etc, as those are the things that they will remember when they grow up.

Even at age 4 my DC were overwhelmed once they got to around 6 presents. After that they didn't want to open any more, just play with what they had.

You say that you are not taking out credit, but only because you couldn't get it, which is a worry because it indicates you would if you could. You say you are on a strict budget, so are you intending to blow that budget?

He's 2. He won't even be able to remember it, so you're not making memories for him.

Also another idea for things to do, we have a local children's appeal here and a food bank.

I've always taken mine out to pick a gift (we were absolutely not well off so only about £10 or so) to donate to a family in need as well as some "nice" treats such as selection boxes, biscuits, chutneys, Jan's etc.

They like choosing things and I like to think it's given them a bit of community spirit

I think I just jealous you have the storage space for £500+ worth of presents and similar the month after.

I'd leave the presents where they are do Santa, Market, maybe Sea Life Center or something Similar. Then get the Clingers PR his birthday. Pay some extra off your debt.