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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To be upset at a woman kicking my friendly 4 month old golden retriever?

496 replies

Marshmallowpops · 14/11/2017 21:22

I am so upset. I've just come back from a walk with my puppy. She's a lovely friendly golden retriever. I've been letting her off leash in the local park as the trainer said it's best to do it early. She is really friendly and loves to play with other dogs- she often meets them all for a play date in the park in the morning- there are always lots of dogs off leash in this park. Normally when there aren't other dogs she trots along beside me, sometimes going off to sniff but coming back when called. She's not too bothered about people but will say hello and sit down (not jump up) as she is trained to do. Today it was dark at 8pm and I let her off as normal, she just trots along and comes back when called. But today she saw two women, one with a baby in a carrier) so went over to say hello (she's normally not bothered but today was a little hyper), but she just trotted over like she does, really gently and not aggressive at all. I said to the woman 'don't worry she won't jump up she'll just sit down and say hello', but before my puppy had even reached the woman, the woman started kicking her away! I could understand if the dog seemed aggressive but she's the sweetest thing. She kicked her repeatedly, my puppy came back to me, I put her on the lead, and the other woman started having a go at me asking if I thought it was acceptable for my dog to go over and attack her baby. She was smoking a cigarette. I wanted to say that is going to cause more harm to the baby than my dog ever would but I didn't. I know of course that as a mother you are very protective of your baby but I just would never attack a friendly dog. Maybe they've had bad experiences in the past. I'm just very upset. I know not everyone likes dogs but that park is so dog busy that I thought everyone was used to it by now. I think I'll keep her on a lead at night until she's really 100% with recall. She's about 90% now. So I know there will be people who say I'm in the wrong letting her off but if she had an aggressive bone in her body I would never let her off.

OP posts:
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Barbie222 · 16/11/2017 20:21

I like dogs but only from a distance as I have a bad allergy. To be fair though I have only very rarely been approached by a dog and when I have I have to say that 99% of owners are very understanding - just to give some perspective. Sounds like the op has taken views on board and learned from experience.

MsHarry · 16/11/2017 21:31

I walk my dog on shared paths. When I hear a cyclist approach, I hold onto my dog's collar if she's off lead. Most cyclists say thanks. Th problem I have is with cyclists with no bell! They approach at speed and I don't hear them until they are nearly upon me.

MsAdorabelleDearheartVonLipwig · 16/11/2017 22:08

A cyclist tried to overtake my friend’s horse without letting her know he was approaching from behind. The horse apparently heard him at the last second, wheeled round in the road and the cyclist was forced to swerve and went up the grass verge and fell off. There’s a man that’s learnt a quick lesson in road manners.

Anyway. Yes it’s annoying having an excitable puppy running about but equally you’ve got to be a twat to kick a puppy, so, equally to blame really.

CherryChasingDotMuncher · 16/11/2017 22:55

Also they kind of have to prefer dogs because they're such twats that no fucker else wants to spend time with them, witless drooling animals that eat each other's shit being an honorable exception

😂😂😂

I do think it has something to do with enjoying the company of a creature who is blindly loyal and doesn’t answer back, too. The “I prefer dogs to people” people I know all have huge control issues.

Nancy91 · 16/11/2017 23:05

People that don't like dogs aren't to be trusted. They are of the same ilk as the people that hate Christmas. Or parties. Or joy in general.

Ropsleybunny · 16/11/2017 23:06

The posts on this thread just confirm my view that people aren’t very nice really. On the other hand Golden Retriever puppies are adorable 😍

user1497997754 · 16/11/2017 23:07

I much prefer the company of my dogs to people.....that does not make me a control freak or a nasty person to people....it's just a personal preference....simple as

CherryChasingDotMuncher · 16/11/2017 23:12

I love Christmas and parties. I dislike dogs as they make me nervous, I wouldn’t want harm to come to one though. If a ‘hyper’ one off its lead ran at my baby I can’t promise that I wouldn’t kick it out the way.

missyB1 · 17/11/2017 09:58

Nancy91 I'm with you - and so was the famous vet James Herriot who said he didn't trust anyone that didn't like dogs.

missyB1 · 17/11/2017 10:00

I should add that of course James Herriot's real name was Alf White but I will always think of him as Herriot!

Mittens1969 · 17/11/2017 10:28

The posts on this thread just confirm my view that people aren’t very nice really. On the other hand Golden Retriever puppies are adorable 😍

This, sadly I agree. Some of the posts on this thread have been absolutely vile. I also love Golden Retriever puppies, but I still wouldn’t want to own one.

BertrandRussell · 17/11/2017 11:08

If you don't know much about dogs, you would' think think that a 4 month old retriever was a puppy.

BertrandRussell · 17/11/2017 11:09

wouldn't think

Mishappening · 17/11/2017 22:36

It's a power thing I think. Blind loyalty must be the ultimate power trip.

It is not love - pets appear devoted because that is where their food comes from and that is how they survive. Stop feeding them and they will change their allegiance to someone who does in a blink.

Mittens1969 · 17/11/2017 22:56

That’s definitely true of cats, Mishappening, I should know as I’ve always had cats. But it’s not true of dogs; my DSis’s Labrador Retriever has a blind loyalty to her exh, who abused her as well as my DSis. It’s to do with being pack animals, I believe. It’s obviously not love like humans know it, but there’s a lot more to it than cupboard love.

Nancy91 · 18/11/2017 00:03

Mishappening, you're wrong there. Isn't love as we know it just oxytocin levels? It has been proven that dogs love their owners by monitoring the levels of that hormone when the dog is around them vs strangers. The same hormone bonds you to your kids and partner. So dogs do actually LOVE their families.

Cats on the other hand probably wouldn't piss on you if you were on fire.

blueskydreams · 18/11/2017 00:38

Stop feeding them and they will change their allegiance to someone who does in a blink
not to mention the fact that it will eat your face if you die

ChocolateDoll · 18/11/2017 00:49

I'm interested in how your dog says 'hello'.

Any chance of a short video clip.

I have a feeling this may be where some of your problems lie.

BertrandRussell · 18/11/2017 07:14

"I'm interested in how your dog says 'hello'.

Any chance of a short video clip.

I have a feeling this may be where some of your problems lie."

I'm a fully paid up member of the "Animas are animals and people are people and anyone who prefers animal to people has issues they need to address" tendency, but my dog most certainly says "hello". And can very clearly communicate lots of other things as well.

Redguitar2 · 22/11/2017 21:16

Going off on a tangent so apologies but I disagree with the cat comment. I don't think we know enough to say but this article points towards cats being more than just food-orientated eating machines! www.bbc.co.uk/earth/story/20151015-your-cat-can-pick-up-on-how-you-are-feeling

RunYouJuiceBitch · 22/11/2017 21:52

She should not have kicked your dog, but you shouldn't have allowed your dog to approach a stranger in such a way.

You do not know how people are going to react to your dog. You cannot predict or be responsible for their behaviour, so you shouldn't put your dog in this position.

You have a responsibility to your dog not to let this happen to her again. Use the lead more effectively and do not let her off around other people until she has fully learnt her recall.

You are not exempt from being a responsible dog owner simply because your dog is young or cute, I'm sorry to say.

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