To ask of times when you were really broke

[Dollardime]

We've had a really hard time financially the past 3 months. Bill after bill after bill.

My car has just failed it's MOT and needs £230 worth of work done it which we physically haven't got.

I feel really down and depressed today - please give me times of when you were broke and how it got better on the end to give me some hope 😞

My husband opened up a business for which he took out a huge loan. The house was secured on the loan. We had 2nd baby soon after but the business was not making enough money which landed him in debt. My 2nd child ended up in intensive care because medical problems and my husband could work as he was at the hospital which landed us in more debt. Luckily the mortgage company gave us a payment holiday when he explained our situation. It was hard going when my little one came home. Eventually my in laws gave him some money to cover some of the debt which he has now returned to them as the business started to take off in last few years.

I found myself living alone at 20 after my partner died of cancer, I literally had just enough money each month to pay the bills with none left for food or anything else. I sold absolutely everything I could sell for a tenner here and there I used to sit in at night after work with my little dog and just feel hungry and cry! Mum luckily found out and used to bring me bags of shopping before I finally gave up and moved back in with her.

Just to echo what a few others have said, this thread has made me feel very very grateful for the roof over my head, the food in my fridge and the fact that I know we can pay the bills.

Thank you so much to everyone for your honesty and I truly hope things turn around very soon for everyone who is currently struggling

I once had to make the choice of a few pound in the electric or in the gas meter. My cooker was electric, but my fire was gas so I chose warmth & ate cold potatoes out of a tin that someone had given me. I was in a council flat & had a mattress on the floor & not much else.
Today I live in a lovely big house & have an Aga... is like a parallel universe! 😀

When I was pregnant, DH was made redundant whilst I was on maternity leave and nothing was forthcoming despite him applying for every job going (seasonal area). We couldn't afford to run the car so that limited job options further.

I went to bed every night crying because I was worried sick, thinking the stress and lack of food would harm the baby because all I ate was toast and the most basic pasta meals (tinned toms, value cheese). I also had DD to worry about - DH and I went without so she was never without.

My mum helped where she could (pensioner on very little herself), my dad didn't want to know and ILs helped when they could too, but god it was hard and I'm forever grateful to the support we had. I remember sobbing on my birthday because my friends ha got together and got me a Boots voucher. I got us all basic toiletries (washed our hair and bodies with value soap for ages) and nappies stocked up for DS arrival.

That was four years ago now. Luckily DH found employment for a short while then got the job he wanted which he remains in now. I came off maternity leave early and was able to work 30 hours plus a week thanks to my DM looking after the baby. I got a promotion and a pay rise too.

Eventually we cleared all our bills, and now we always have food and toiletries, kids have everything they need including nursery fees an tuition, and we have a tiny disposable income for odds and sods. We are hoping to increase this next year when we don't have to pay certain fees and be able to start finally saving properly.

It does get better OP but fuck me, it sucks. Second time in my life I've been beyond broke (1st was mum and I living on beans on toast for what felt like forever as Dad fucked off and wasn't keen on paying maintenance for me). I hope I'm never there again.
for you. Please take care of yourself.

And saving up £700 is a great thing in this climate. You will do it again and hopefully increase it. I'm aiming for at least £500 saved from January to December.

Mine was when I was a student. Walking everywhere as I couldn’t justify the cost of the bus or train. Skipping meals or eating breakfast cereal as it was cheap. I remember going to the supermarket with a calculator to make sure that I didn’t buy anything over the amount in my purse.

I remember having friends over and going out for dinner and pretending I was full as I couldn’t afford to eat out. I was so embarrassed.

Going to bed early instead of eating dinner in the evenings and walking 3 miles to the supermarket and then 3 miles back with the shopping.

to all of you who are currently going through difficult times.
It's been many, many years since I was a single mum to 3 young children and life was very hard. I was very slim back then because I walked everywhere and ate very little!
One weekend we had a tin of peaches and custard in the house so that's what we had for sunday dinner. As adults, my children remember that meal as very exciting because I'd presented it as a real treat!
I hope all of you who are hungry or cold get fed and warm soon.

Lived for a week on rice and peas for tea and tesco value white bread for toast in the morning. Had to sell my engagement in the end we were so hungry. Sorry, you are going through this OP it's crap when you are broke. I know this sounds a bit bleh! but things always work out in the end.

Looking out of the window every morning hoping and praying that it wasn’t raining as i had holes in my boots as I’d had to wear them throughout summer as I just couldn’t afford a new pair and i walked miles to work and back as I couldn’t afford the bus fair. I remember being so embarrassed when I visited a service users home and they asked me if I would mind taking my shoes off and my socks were soaking wet though with holes in.

I sympathise and hope that you get a break from big bills soon enough to get your head back above water.

Years ago we had a bad time when we redid our mortgage to a fixed rate one (the rate was fixed high and meant £400 extra per month!) and then afterwards the bloody Bank of England base rate dropped so we would have been better off on a tracker.

Same month both our old cars had huge issues costing nearly a months wages a piece. Plus costs of getting to and from work. In this month a family member DBinlaw, had an issue with a bill and DSinlaw said all of the family would club together to pay and we were too stupid timid to say no and it was almost my last few pounds.

Then at the end of that week I had to do client visits in London and was supposed to be meeting them at their offices. When I got there they said "oh we thought we could go to the coffee place around the corner" and proceeded to order lots of things! The shop was only a little kiosk type thing in a park that didn't accept card and I had to count out change from my purse like a scav. They looked embarrassed for me and I was honestly sweating as to whether I had enough money! That definitely sticks in my head as being a struggle and I felt very sorry for myself!

When I was a student nurse I was working as many shifts as I could on the nurse bank but they'd not paid me the right amount and it took weeks to get sorted.

I was mainly living off plain pasta as it was all I could afford, I definitely couldn't afford stuff to make a packed lunch for the placement I was on, but I didn't want to admit it, so I'd move between offices at lunchtime so other staff didn't realise.

After a couple of days a really wonderful social worker who was part of the team (but in no way responsible for me) left a sandwich on my desk with a note saying She's accidently brought in too many and thought I might like it. She did the same every day until the end of the month when I got paid.

I remember feeling so embarrassed that she obviously knew how poor I was, but also so grateful for her kindness.

Other than growing up poor, my worst time in terms of money was after getting rid of the abusive boyfriend. My rent was exactly the amount of my pay. I managed to get a better job, ft as opposed to the part time he had allowed me to have

Then it was a question of eating at work, subsidised canteen, and got into sever rent arrears. Ran up credit card debt. Food at home came from the staff shop where the store used to sell over date but still safe food to staff. Iventaully moved out, when I moved in with DH, and spent the next five years paying off the rent arrears.

A very strong bunch on this thread. Just goes to show, life can throw some absolute shit at you but it does come around again. Keep your chin up, your head held high & keep moving forward.

Every year since I have been okay - roof over our head, food, heating etc - i've done a massive food shop for the food bank. A sort of 'thank you' because without soup kitchens i wouldn't be here. I like to think that it will help people who genuinely need it, in times they are desperate. I hope 2018 is a much better year for everyone here 🌷

I was so sick and tired of using cheap toilet paper as makeshift sanitary towels that I asked my mum to lend me £2 to buy some tampons just to feel clean again at that totm. She said no as she needed to pay her 'friend' at work some random make-up shit she had ordered from her.
She didn't want to look bad in front of her workmates. I was her unpaid childminder at the time while she worked.
Now that made me feel like shit. And it always will.

These times will pass. I promise you. And you will come out stronger for it. Trust me.

When I left care social services paid my rent and the fostering allowance , to " foster myself". It wasn't apparent to them that fosterers were not living on that money alone.
I had a prepaid money but used to knock on the student house next door to borrow £5 fir the meter, really it was for food. I used to walk to the Kwik Save and buy beans for 8p.
Also I would regularly walk 3 miles to Cash Covertors to pawn my stereo system for £16.
The worst time was when I lived off a milky bar for a week- the kind WH Smith's flog for a pound.
Eventually I finished , college then Uni and know financially I have no worries.
I do hoard food though, as I have an irrational fear of myself or my dc going hungry.

Grew up poor and ended up homeless at 15 in a B&B then council flat via social work when I was 16. I had a YTS placement which I got paid £29.50 per week which I had to pay to travel to my placement, electric, food etc. Had a couch of a charity and the tiniest tv I think ever invented. Lived off cheap noodles and remember huddling against whatever heat my storage heater had left in it after the power went off. I really was alone apart from the social worker who would come by occasionally until the final time when he tried it on.

I had to put all my dirty clothes in a suitcase and drag it to the next town to my mums house and she would let me wash them in her machine. That was tough, couldn't afford the fare and it was a very heavy old case.

Im much more comfortable now, im a single mother to two great kids but i've always worked and I think thats what saved me from a lot of what I see around me. I have a nice car, small savings for emergencys and the same as a lot of people on here cupboards and freezer packed with food and clothes i'll never wear!!
I make sure my oldest studies really hard and am pushing for him to go to uni so he'll never end up like me.
When the youngest starts school im planning to retrain and still work part time so im never ever huddled up against a crappy storage heater again! I know NEVER to rely on anyone else for your financial security/roof over your head. Im in a council house so I know if I become sick and can't work i'll at least have a roof over my head/boiler repaired. I won't give up that security unless I win the lottery!

These posts are really making me cry!
Hats off to all you amazing folk who have made it through tough times and are still standing xx

When we were skint due to 15% interest rate on mortgage, we went off grid.
We only had one car that dh needed for work, but it was the most economical to run at the time.
We grew our own fruit and veg and bartered lots of services for goods with other neighbours and friends.
We tried to spend as little as possible and had no treats or luxuries.
very much like "The Good Life" they were some of the best days of our time together tbh.

Oh OP I'm sorry you're in this situation. But the one thing I always hang on to (and I use present tense because honestly I know it can happen in a heartbeat again) is that my bills were paid. 2010 I think was my worst year. After the bills there was around a 5er left for food. I walked everywhere, as did 7yo dd, in that awful snow. We lived in my bedroom exclusively, except for cooking and bathing. We shared bathwater, and me, dd, 2 dogs and a cat slept in my bed with 2 sets of curtains up at the window, and all the duvets, hot water bottles etc. Heating would go on for an hour while I magicked up whatever I could to eat then bath and into bed before house cooled down too much it didn't really warm up and we watched TV, with no lights on at all. That was a hard winter, I lost 2 stone from walking and not eating much at all. Dd went to her dads for Christmas and I volunteered a double shift on the day so I would be warm and fed. Had some good friends in the same situation and we'd sometimes pool what we had, stick it on one houses gas/electric and cook a big communal meal. It was bloody hard but those friends are so dear to me because of what we shared that winter.
Things got better, I've had blips when things have happened, but in general it's not that dire now. I am grateful every day I don't have to live like that now. Please don't lose hope, you did amazingly well to save that £700 and you're now not in debt by that £700. I think that's great! I have £118 saved for Christmas, plus £30 on a store loyalty card. I am excited at the prospect of having that just for Christmas and not having to rob Peter to pay Paul at Christmas this year.
It will pass OP, good luck x

My experiences are nowhere near as bad as others on here. Mostly caused by my own stupidity

I quit a job I was miserable in assuming i would get something else. I didn't. I was already spending loads as I was so miserable, I could not afford to quit really.
I was very overdrawn and had credit card debt and I remember getting a letter from the bank telling me I had to have a certain amount of money going in to keep my overdraft and i had no job.
I used to scrabble about for pennies and steal from DCs piggy banks,sold everything I could. I used to take money out of cash machines and then put it back in the bank to look like income and hoped they didn't notice.

What it's given me is the 'fear' I am much more careful about money now - I have a job, I am very very frugal generally. I have no credit card debt, I paid off my overdraft and I have a few thousand in the bank.
I vowed never to overspend again,
I never want to have to make a begging call to the bank ever again.

I grew up poor so it was never a big shock to me in adulthood if money was tight. I remember getting a job at 12 so I could feed me & my sibling. Even then it was pasta with tomato ketchup. I was so skinny my clothes didnt fit. I worked in a takeaway so at weekends would always work the close shift, then I could have the food they'd usually bin.

In adulthood there's been times when it's been tight, but always made sure the basics were covered. Parents thankfully would buy eldests clothes, shoes, toilet rolls and bulk veg. We'd cook it up and freeze it.

My first taste of adulting was possibly worse than when eldest came along. My family would make sure we had a meal every day, his Mum who looked down her nose at me and mine would do nothing. First hubby had expensive tastes but a wage packet that didn't match. We'd have Sunday lunch at my family too, then get given left overs to make up lunches. My family also added the extra needed for the mortgage if we were ever short. I find it funny now that his Mum thought she was better than us, when it was my family keeping us from being really badly off.

This thread is stirring up memories of my past and it saddens me to read posts that have mirrored my own experiences. It has hit home that out there it is a daily struggle for lots. I read a lot of threads on mumsnet about “is it justifiable to buy bedding for £1000 , “ we can’t afford x y and z even though we are both earn £100k a year etc etc etc, people whining about their comfortable lifestyle stresses and then you read about how a mother goes without food to feed her children,brings tears to my eyes. My heart goes out to anybody who is in a struggle at this moment(most of us normal human beings have all been there at some point).