To ask of times when you were really broke

[Dollardime]

We've had a really hard time financially the past 3 months. Bill after bill after bill.

My car has just failed it's MOT and needs £230 worth of work done it which we physically haven't got.

I feel really down and depressed today - please give me times of when you were broke and how it got better on the end to give me some hope 😞

DDs and I are currently sat in a freezing cold home because I don’t have any money for gas till tomorrow and the emergency ran out last night. I’m currently busting my ass at college (single parent on benefits) with two offers from two excellent Unis on the table so I can make sure this shit doesn’t ever happen again. Since ExH ghosted me when I was pregnant with baby DD I’ve been on the bare bones of my arse. Some of the 2.5K he owes me in child support would be nice. —fucking useless CMS—

We're at the point where our home is being sold (we rent privately), with no savings to put a deposit down on a new home, we owe thousands of pounds to various companies, I have £1.97 in my purse to last until the 28th (payday) and overdrawn by so much I haven't slept properly for months. We have 2 DD to feed, so that £1.97 will go on them. We haven't put the heating on yet. This will be our youngest's first Christmas and we'll have to start getting creative to get presents for either of them. Let alone the food. I turn the TV over if a Christmas ad comes on now. Hopefully the new year will be better. I hope it does for you too, op.

We're also trying to get back into the black. We live in London and the cost of childcare and everything else is terrifying. Plus I have a child with ASD and the costs of raising a child with SEN are huge. Specialist equipment, childcare so that we can attend appointments and activities. Special swimming lessons etc. We get no DLA.

I'm just back to work after mat leave. We both have good jobs but have no choice but to end each month overdrawn. I am so worried about the future and sadly counting down the days until the youngest is in school and we don't have to pay for full time childcare.

This thread has made me cry, but it has been good to read and I know it's important to know you're not alone and this too shall pass. It does. I have so many awful bits. Too many to mention, but when I was pregnant with my 2nd I couldn't afford to eat and only just fed my eldest. He had a potato with beans every day. He was 4. I would drink cheap vegetable stock and eat his leftovers (on the rare occasion there was any). The local
Chinese takeaway knew something was up because I looked so malnourished by the end, they started leaving me leftovers on my doorstep at the end of the night. Usually prawn crackers and rice! Years later things are much better, but I still worry a great deal. Things change like the flipping of a coin, but they can change back to good just the same. Please don't be disheartened, this will change. I promise. X

Pawning my engagement ring and eternity ring which meant the absolute world to me,
Last year when things were very bad.
I missed the deadline to get them back and have said they are lost.
It breaks my heart and I hate lying to dp.

I spent the money on food and bills and it was gone- just like that.

We're still pretty poor and am desperately trying to get a job but I have a chronic illness and other problems which make it pretty near impossible.

Although things haven't improved for us yet,
I know they will. Once you're at rock bottom the only way is up.

I watched a programme with my dd who is 6 about "poor children" and said an extra prayer that night. Those children really had nothing and made me feel ashamed for moaning.
There is always someone worse off, not that I like thinking like that of course but it's a case of me being optimistic about the future.

I think human beings are so resilient and one day I will look back and wonder how I coped, but I am and I did.

Lovely to hear all of the stories of people who have better times

Being 2 days from my due date and having to get a wonga lone because I had no formula or nappies in for the baby. It's dad insisted he'd got the stuff (the only things I asked him to get) and it was in his car and it wasn't. He really had got fuck all for his baby.

Toddler DD had to eat apple sandwiches and tea biscuits for tea 3 days in a row (little trooper she didn't mind she said) and I lived on asda £1 frozen ready meals or super noodles and not much else as too tired too skint and too depressed to have anything else. DC2 was worth all that and more wouldn't be without him but it makes me sad to think instead of being excited he was due any day I was praying he would be a week late because then my next lot of
Tax credits and wages would be in. Even though I'm perfectly happy with my 2 I'd love one more chance to have a happy pregnancy.

Going without electric on weekends when DC was at his dad's, and missing many meals so I could afford food for dc and electric when he was home with me.
Getting the bus to bring DC to school and then walking home and back again (10 miles) and getting the bus home with him, to save a return fee.

Now I'm living comfortably, in a nice house, in a good area and never have to do things like that anymore. DC remembers our time together back then, fondly.

This is honestly such a humbling post to read. I have £3,000 debts i'm trying to pay off, but reading this thread reminds me I have food in the fridge, a roof over my head, and electricity to keep me warm.

My mother was a single parent of two and struggled for years - in fact she still does struggle I suppose. So I grew up knowing the value of everything. But nothing as bad as the situations i'm reading here.

Very humbling.

Can echo the full cupboards and toilets hoards. Growing up food was rubbish, there were no treats except for the adults, no school stuff, little heating and when I left home at the earliest opportunity I lived on pasta for months whilst living under a duvet.

Uni was out of the question so I studied a different path that led to a job after doing some work experience and since then I've changed careers three times but have never not worked. Work was what broke the cycle.

My children will never experience my childhood, I've made sure of that. I try to teach them to value education, never rely on others and don't have children unti financially stable as they cost a lot.

I rented and lived on the floor of someone's cleaning cupboard. You could just fit a mattress on the floor.

Is it wrong to read this thread when I’m comfortable to remind myself how life can change so quickly and to be grateful? I’m in awe of all of you for getting through it and hope I never find out whether I’m strong enough

I've had times of highs and lows. I think the lows were living on tinned tomatoes and toast for weeks whilst waiting for benefits years ago. I was out of work 3 years ago and burst into tears at the job centre. They wouldn't help towards my travel costs for an interview but would have if I hadn't had a job previously. We had over extended ourselves to move and then I walked out of the job as it was horrific. I was so sure I'd find something. I didn't for a year. We were about to have to sell the house. Dh was working 6/7 days a week,I was attending interviews for jobs that I wouldn't have considered before. The interviewers knew I was desperate and went with less experienced people and it really dented my confidence. I came onto mn and started a thread about how low I was. I got some lovely pms and I did have some offers to help me afford to go to the interviews. I didn't accept but it made me grateful that I had an outlet to really say how I felt and get some support.
We are now ok ish financially. I have helped out a couple of mners when they've been skint,not much but a little to get a bit of shopping. They have always paid it back too.
Life is sometimes shit,sometimes fantastic. I hope your luck improves soon op

Right now. No money for gas so cant cook a decent dinner and its bloody freezing. It is fucking soul destroying and i feel like a failure of a person and a mother.

When I ended up finally having the courage to walk away from an abusive relationship I was left buying out his share of the business we had and paying the rent on a joint tenancy trying to get his name off. I was working from 4 am til 8 pm and not making any more money than paid for the rent and debts he had run up I hadn't enough money to eat some days just feed the dog. On days I did eat it was out of date stuff or when my best friend (now DH) cooked. I ended up run down and then got food poisoning and ended up in hospital for eight days and in bed for weeks and had to close the business. Ended up with ibs and several chronic illnesses as a result. Last day I felt well was 31st January 2009 Married now DH and still have the dog and 2 DCs mind you so every cloud .

17 and living in a bedsit. On "emergency" on my electric meter, middle of winter. No heating or light. Sitting in bed, fully dressed, coat and hat and gloves on, hungry, no money coming for days. It was scary. I survived, things got better. In my thirties now and comfortable. Terrified of being skint again.

I had no money after leaving uni & had to borrow money to buy tampons. Was so embarrassed. Had to squat in a flat for months. I’m so afraid of being in debt again. It makes me wary of spending money at all.

2009,
Lost my job in the crunch and had no income with 7, 3 and 1 year old.no work, so on dole and went self employed. Things had just started to show signs that we say be improving when diagnosed with cancer.

Surgery and chemo whilst being self employed with no money was excruciating but somehow things improved.

Now in a great job and cancer free with good income but still feeling the effects of it all these years later.

Chin up up, as long as you all have your health you’ll be ok

When I was an apprentice I used to forage in the bins for sandwiches which were chucked out.

Noodles for dinner every night, sometimes a mate of mine gave me some army ration packs that were being chucked out due to short date...

Sounds worse than it was, but living like a pauper meant I could afford petrol for my 20 year old car and have a roof over my head.

Also, not my story but I know one exceedingly wealthy friend of mine remembers his parents claiming they'd been burgled once when he was a kid. He found out years later they had sold the TV and his computer (that he'd bought with money from his Saturday job) because they were broke. Same friend also found out in his teens that his parents had been driven to giving him dog meat on sandwiches and pretending it was meat paste as they had nothing left. This was back before the days of food banks.

He is now very well off and doing well.

This thread has made me feel so embarrased. Here i was whinging about money and reading this has made me realise my problems are tiny in comparison to what they could be.

I sincerely hope things improve for those having a hard time, you all deserve it

Budgeting app? Which is a good one?

“Daily Budget”!!

It’s brilliant. It calculates a daily budget based on your incomings and outgoings and then obviously you tap in your purchases and it tells you how much you have left for today.

But the best feature is the “big spendings” function where you tell it, for example, that you want to save £100 for Xmas presents by the 10th December or that you need £10 for drinks with friends on Friday. It then calculates how much you need to save a day until then and takes it off your daily budget.

I’d say I’ve saved about £150 in the last 3 weeks I’ve been using it.